Answer: Not a one!
Whoopi Goldberg went to a Vanity Fair party at the Tribeca Film Festival in NYC last night and UsWeekly asked her a few questions. Based on the way Whoopi was dressed, they should’ve asked her what it was like teaching a young Harry Potter. But instead they asked her who she thinks should replace Joy Behar and Elisabeth Hasselcrack on The View next season. Whoopi’s internal hard drive processed that question for a quick second before she opened up her empty hands to show UsWeekly how many fucks she gives.
“Let me tell you this about The View: I take a paycheck every other week. That’s all I do. I could give a shit what comes. I do my job — I have a contract. That’s where I stand. I don’t give a fuck.”
Just in case we didn’t get it the first time, the honey badger of daytime talk show hosts let us know that unless ABC pays her to care, she no care!
“I don’t care. That’s not my job. My job is to show up and be cute by 11 o’clock and get the fuck off that show by 12. And that’s what I try to do. I think it’s the only way to keep your sanity because these are not decisions that I get to make. It ain’t my show. It’s Barbara’s show.”
So all Whoopi does is show up on time, leave on time and be cute? Barbara Walters needs to bring up that last part in Whoopi’s next employee evaluation, because I’ve seen the shit she wears on TV and it definitely doesn’t fall into the cute category. But seriously, where can I get a job like Whoopi’s, because I really want to get paid to not give one shit. Oh…wait….
And here’s a knocked up Evan Rachel Wood, Sandra Bernhard and Sienna Miller at last night’s Vanity Fair party and I’m sure Whoopi doesn’t give a shit about any of them.