Donald Trump Is Going To Be Somebody’s Grandfather Again

April 11, 2013 / Posted by:

Ivanka Trump is always working, working, working, working and she says that she works 16 hours most days, but yet she still found time to make a baby. My guess is that Ivanka’s husband Jared Kushner rushes into her office in the middle of the day and quickly does her from the back while she’s typing an e-mail with one hand and filling out her expense report with the other. So now Ivanka’s assistant knows why her expense reports are always sticky and covered in lube and saliva.

Both Page Six and People say that Ivanka and Jared’s 20-month-old daughter Arabella Rose is going to get a brother or a sister this fall. A source tells Page Six that Ivanka somehow found the time in between working, working, working, working to tell her friends that she’s knocked up.

Ivanka and Jared are currently in the process of designing a swivel rolling labor chair for her office, so she can work work, work, work, work while giving birth.

Anyway, congratulations to Ivanka and Jared’s nannies on their upcoming arrival! Also, congratulations to Ivanka and Jared’s fetus, because in a few months it’ll get to do what everyone in the world wants to do: spit and barf on Donald Trump’s ugly face.

And here’s the most beautiful Trump of them all, Melania Trump, at the launch of her new skin care line in NYC on Tuesday. Yes, Melania Trump is actually selling a line of skin care products. Is she really trying to make us believe that she uses products on her gorgeous face when we all know that her daily beauty regimen consists of tightening the piano wires that keep her face tight before dipping her mug in a tub of wax? Whatever, Melania is still giving us some cat-faced Sofia Vergara glamour and her eyebrows are a thing of majestic perfection.

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