Since murdering eardrums and showing off her new face on InTouch didn’t get Farrah Abraham of Teen Mom enough attention, she’s gone full shameless fame whore by pretending that the porn she made with porn star James Deen is a private sex tape that she doesn’t want to get out. Don’t you hate it when the planned fuck tape you made with a porn star in a studio while surrounded by two cameramen, three fluffers, a director and an entire crew GETS leaked onto the internet? That’s the worst.
Earlier today, TMZ said that a sex tape starring Farrah’s post-op Gargamel-looking ass was up for sale and Vivid was going to make an offer for it. They “caught” Farrah shopping for panties at Agent Provocateur in L.A. yesterday afternoon and they asked her about it. Farrah sort of denied it and then a few minutes later her last tattered brain cell tore in two when she tried to figure out what the word “elaborate” means. TMZ has the video of the silicone implant in Farrah’s head exploding when their cameradude used a 3rd grade word around her, but if you don’t feel like looking at her confused plastic face, here’s the transcript:
TMZ: So, Farrah, can you elaborate a little bit on what we spoke about earlier?
Farrah: A library?
TMZ: No, “elaborate.”
Farrah: E-lab-or-ate? Who are you and why are you asking me about a tape?
TMZ: Have you heard about this, though? That you have a sex tape that’s out, that’s being shopped around right now?
Farrah: I don’t know. You know what? There should be no tape and if they’re shopping it around, my lawyer’s going to talk about that.
TMZ: Can you confirm its existence?
Farrah: I don’t exist anything about that. I don’t know what you’re talking about. Personally that is going to make me upset, so I don’t know why you would ask me about it.
TMZ: We have sources that say that they’ve seen the tape and it’s an hour long.
Farrah: Who’s your source? You know what? I think it’s made up. People make shit up all the time.
TMZ: This could be advantageous to your career. A lot of young starlets get their start from these things.
Farrah: I’m not even worried about that. I work hard on my own professionally and I don’t need sex tapes or any of that bullshit.
This bitch had to sound out the word “elaborate.” In this dumb ho’s defense, she was walking and talking at the same time and we all know that’s really, really hard to do.
After Farrah bruised up the inside of her head while trying to form complete sentences, TMZ heard that James Deen was her sex tape co-star and so they asked him about it. James Deen admitted that he slapped his peen against Farrah’s chocha in a sex tape. But James said that it was strictly professional and they got tested on Friday and shot the tape on Saturday.
You know, maybe Farrah’s denials are authentic and genuine, because she is so damn stupid that she probably doesn’t remember what she did 10 minutes ago let alone a day ago. If Farrah is as good at boning as she is at putting together a thought, then Kim Kartrashian will lose her title as the deadest lay in a sex tape.
Here’s Farrah’s silicone chichis melting like two Junior Mints left out in the sun while posing in some photo shoot yesterday.