Over four years ago, we all learned about Shauna Sand’s ethereal powers when she floated on the sand in Miami on a two bars of exquisite lucite. Religious historians noted that day as the day that a saint actually topped Jesus’ walk on water act by walking on sand in heels. It was such an important moment that I’m pretty sure they added it to the Holy Bible. Chapter 1, verse 1, I think. Well, who ever adds stuff to the Holy Bible is going to need more paper, because they’ll have to add a new chapter now that the Empress of Lucite has done it again.
Yesterday, Miami got a long-awaited encore performance of Shauna Sand’s magic show when she glided along the sand in heels made of raw marble (or faux cork from China, same thing). Shauna greeted her young disciples, cleansed the air by flipping her weave made of the finest hay and healed dehydrated animals with her beauty.
A true goddess. Miami should declare that sand an important landmark now that Shauna Sand has touched it.