Afternoon Crumbs

April 8, 2013 / Posted by:

Some smart-brained genius bought toy poodles for $150 at a bazaar in Argentina and they turned out to be ferrets on roids. So if your toy poodle always looks ragey and can bench press twice its weight, it’s probably a ferret on roids – Buzzfeed

The paparazzi hung upside down from a helicopter to get pictures of Goopy Paltrow’s backyard party and they didn’t get one shot of her beloved outdoor wood-burning pizza oven. For shame! – Lainey Gossip

Things I didn’t need to know: When Vladimir Putin gets a hard on for activist nipples, he makes a Zoolander face – Jezebel

Mark this day in history as the first time that Kate Moss’ nipples didn’t make an appearance in a photo shoot – Drunken Stepfather

Also mark this day in history as the first time that a purse was stolen in Hollywood and Lindsay Lohan wasn’t somehow involved – The Superficial 

“You’re stealing my heart right now….” is pretty much what people said to Ryan Gosling when he fake robbed a bank – The Berry 

What you look like when you’re in the center of a Blue Man Group circle jerk – Towleroad

Even Kim Kardashian’s scale tells lies – Celebitchy

Kaley Cuoco or a blond Katy Perry? – Hollywood Tuna 

Tater Head’s hair looks like over-fried hash browns – ICYDK

Jessica Alba’s bikini top looks like a tuxedo bow tie – Popoholic

Bravo should stop postponing the inevitable and replace all of The Real Housewives of Miami with La Bruja and her maid – Reality Tea 

All of us should put our coins together and get Sara Gilbert and Linda Perry a bottle of detangling shampoo as an engagement gift – Just Jared

My heart just melted and leaked out of my butt and it’s all Lentil’s fault – OMG Blog

Why, hello there, HammacondaSOW

Megan Fox’s red hair is not very April O’Neil-ish – Popsugar

They should’ve titled this important story: “Various celebrities and Ashley Greene at the airport”Videogum

And in the NASCAR parking lot, a drunk 65-year-old grandpa is wearing the exact same outfit as RiRiIDLYITW

Martha Stewart faps to Ryan Gosling too – I’m Not Obsessed

What in the slutty first communion outfit hell is Mischa Barton wearing? – Hollywood Rag 

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