No, that’s not a trick question. I think.
On last night’s season premiere of The Real Menopausal Barbies of Orange County, the original Real Housewife, Vicki Gunvalson, showed us what thousands of dollars, massive amounts of low-self esteem and a silicone chin gets you. After Gretchen’s dried skid mark of a fiance Slade Smiley compared her to Miss Piggy last season, Vicki’s self-esteem plummeted into the gutter with Alexis Bellino’s financial situation. Vicki said she’s always felt unpretty, but Slade’s comments helped to push her under the plastic surgeon scalpel. Vicki had her nose thinned, fat injected into her cheeks and she had a chin implant put in. The picture on the left is Vicki in 2010 and the picture on the right is Vicki last month.
I watched last night and Vicki looked the same to me. Vicki’s face just looked extra squished and swollen. But now that I’m looking at the pictures I see the difference. Vicki’s old face was covered in real human skin and it looked somewhat biodegradable. Vicki’s new face makes her look like she’s got the same complexion as a vanilla candle that has been left out in the sun too long. Those bat pube lashes don’t help either. If Vicki wanted to look like Overly Attached Girlfriend’s grandma, then she got the look she wanted.
And the hell did they do to Vicki’s dimples? Injecting all that fat into her cheeks gave her butt cracks on her face.
Here’s Vicki debuting her “settled” new face on WWHL last night:
For the record, I think Vicki looks better now, but only because she has a pair of beautiful butt cracks framing her mouth.