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Just in time for Easter….Bacon-Flavored Condoms!

Easter, Christmas and all the other holidays have come early for you pork-loving whores, because you no longer have to get your dick and bacon fix by dipping your peen of choice into the glass jar of bacon grease you keep under the kitchen cabinet before you lick it. J & D Foods, the makers of the April Fool’s joke-turned actual thing Bacon Lube, have once again brought pork into porking by selling bacon-flavored condoms. This Sunday, skip the Honey Baked Ham and suck on some bacon-flavored wang instead.

Justin Esch, one of the co-founders of J & D, tell HuffPo that their condoms aren’t made out of actual bacon (BOO!). They’re made of latex and covered with bacon lube. They sell for $10 for 3 and orders will go out this June. Justin said he got the idea after he had sex with Rob Kardashian and wished that he could package and sell that salty and sour taste of fried pork, coagulated ball sweat and rancid goat cheese. No, Justin said that he got the idea after bacon lube became a huge hit.

We’ve already got bacon lube and omelet dildos, and now we’ve got bacon condoms! Throw in some hollandaise sauce-flavored coochie cream and an English Muffin diaphragm and we’ve got brunch! If you don’t want to use this mess as a condom, just wad it up, stick it in your mouth and chew on it like a piece of bacon-flavored gum that never ends.

And this is probably the closest any of us will get to licking on Jon Hamm’s Hammlog.