But Which One’s The Top And Which One’s The Bottom?

March 27, 2013 / Posted by:

People’s Sexiest Potato Alive 2012 Channing Tatum tells The Sun that his dream man is People’s Sexiest Man Alive 1997/2006 George Clooney and that he wants to make out with George’s butt all night long. Whenever Channing is in a room with George, everybody else disappears, his body turns into a giant boner and all he sees is George’s perfect face. Channing would leave his knocked up wife Jenna Dananahwatever and his unborn baby for George. A stream of drool trickled out of Channing’s mouth when he said this:

“I’ve spent time with George Clooney and he’s the most interesting man on the planet. He can do it all. I guess what I’m saying is I’d have sex with him.”

That’s it? Channing Tatum can’t say that he’d bone George Clooney and leave out the most important details. Would they make out or just get right to it? Would they 69 or 88 or both? Would Channing make George slap him in the face with his peen? These are the details everybody (aka just me) wants to know. But more importantly, who’d be the top and who’d be the bottom?

I’ve seen Channing Tatum’s body rolls in that Magic Mike shit, so I’d say he’s the top. Then again, he seems like the sort of dude you’d meet at a bar, peg as a total top, but then when you get to his apartment and make out for a bit, he excuses himself to freshen up in the bathroom. That totally means he’s going to clean his butt out with a balloon enema. BOTTOM!

Then there’s George. That one’s easy. George looks like he loves it most when his ass is up in the air and his teeth are biting down on a pillow. POWER BOTTOM!

So what I’m saying is that they’d totally use a double-sided dildo.

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