Damn, Dat Ass

March 22, 2013 / Posted by:

I don’t know where I’ve been, because I have never noticed David Beckham’s beautiful bubble bottom butt before. It’s glorious. Is he wearing push-up panties, because his ass is so high that it looks like it’s worshiping God. No wonder Becks’ former stalker Tommy Girl wanted to surgically attach his tongue to Becks’ anus lips. He wanted to wake up in dat ass for the rest of his days and I can’t blame him. I want to lay my head on that ass. I want to eat Thin Mints off that ass. I want to miniaturize myself and jump on it like I’m in a Sleepy’s commercial. I want to stay miniaturized and twirl around on his butt cheeks while singing, “the hiiiiiiiiiills are alive.”

Screw that football shit, with nalgas like that, he should be the captain of the Twerk Team. It’s a damn shame that Posh Beckham won’t munch on his ass, because she thinks butt has too many calories in it. When he wiggles it and convinces her to lick it, she probably pours a little Sensa on it before she eats. How dreadful and a waste of some good Honey Baked ham ass.

Here’s pictures of Becks’ nearly busting the back seams of his pants at a stadium in Bejing yesterday and also pictures of him signing autographs at an event for his H&M bodywear line in Berlin.

Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >