Kim Kartrashian Really Does Bathe Her Face In Blood
I know, the last thing you needed to see on a Monday morning is a close-up shot of a dirty maxi-pad face. Well, at least it's all up from here and nothing you see this week will be grosser than a portrait of a Kartrashian looking like the tip of a 5 day old tampon.
On last night's episode of Kourtney and Kim Taint Miami, one of the Illuminati's secret beauty regimens was revealed when Kim Kartrashian got a Vampire Facelift. Since Kim is a vapid dildo of vainness, she will inject anything into her face (examples: resin, liquid nails, the sperm of Lucifer, the syrupy nectar that forms under Kanye's titties when he throws a tantrum, etc...etc..) to keep her mug looking as tight as Kanye's puckering pussay. And before she got knocked up, she tried some procedure where they take blood from your arm and separate the platelets before injecting it into your face. Here's how Wikipedia explains this Elizabeth Bathory shit:
The Vampire Facelift is the trademarked name for a non-surgical cosmetic procedure involving the reinjection of a gel-like substance—platelet rich fibrin matrix (PRFM)—derived from a patient’s own blood back into multiple areas of the skin of their face in an effort to treat wrinkles and “rejuvenate” the face.[1]
Platelet-rich plasma (PRP) is blood plasma that has been enriched with platelets. When activated, either by thrombin[2] or calcium chloride,[3] PRP takes on the form of a viscous gel (PRFM) containing high levels of several platelet-derived growth factors (cytokines) that may then be injected into the face in much the same manner as other dermal fillers such as Juvederm and Restylane.
Although any of the many available commercial and non-commercial methods for isolating PRP could theoretically be used to obtain the PRP necessary to perform a Vampire Facelift, most media reports about the procedure to date have described using the Regen Lab system to generate the platelet rich plasma utilized.[1]
As of April 2011, there are no scientific publications that describe the Vampire Facelift procedure or examine its efficacy.[1] There are, however, three publications that report that PRP may be useful as a facial filler.
The Vampire Facelift costs around $1,000 and that doesn't include the mace you'll have to buy when the hyenas smell the blood on your mug and try to eat your face off.
There's no way that Kim used her own blood, because she doesn't have any blood. Kim had all of the blood lipoed from her veins years ago, because she thought all that blood made her look fat. Obviously, Kim used the blood of the virgins that Khloe Kardashian caught in the forest.
And no to all of this. The only vampire facial I want is one from Vampire Eric. Wait, I know that vampires cry blood, but do they cum blood too? Not that that's a deal breaker or anything.
(screen shots via The Daily Mail & The Sun)
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If I was about to become a first-time mother the thought of "facial fillers" or wrinkle prevention would be the LAST thing on my mind.
Of course she probably has a slew of workers to design the nursery and do all the "work" but wouldn't you actually WANT to do that kind of stuff? She's too dumb to make proper use of her free time and money. What a waste.
What's next for Sluntrashian, the Giovanna Plowman style facial?
Submitted by Thamar on Tue, 03/12/2013 - 1:41am.
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ITA with all you said Thamar, also others, not that she'd pay any attention. Won't waste my time thinking about this ignoramus one minute longer.
And I never would have guessed it was Neneh, even though it looks like her. ha Night. ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Dlisted is a finalist! http://2013.bloggi.es/ Voting closes March 17.
Rande you might not see. Avie is Neneh Cherry.
There's a lot of bonding happens during pregnancy. If the mom stays tuned in, when baby arrives the relationship has already developed. After all baby has been listening to mama's heart for all those months. Like a beautiful drum beat. Kim seems unaware of all of this. No understanding that she is carrying a human life inside her and that everything she does has an effect on her child. It's not what you say, it's what you do and who you are inside that they pick up.
I agree with comment, don't have name sorry, that after Kanye's mother passed he went over the edge. Dragging your pregnant girl friend all over the globe, fucking her on the cover of a magazine. Dressing her like she's ready for more fucking and parading her around like you are her pimp, while carrying your child are not things Kanye's mother would approve. I bet she has turned over 6 times in her grave. The poor woman.
Ed: ah it was you Labreezy said it. Although Kanye is something of a jackass I liked him too. Maybe he was looking to belong and thought the Kardashian cesspool would be ok.
I'm a Kanye fan but I can't with his ass anymo. Ever since his mom died he has lost his damn mind. I can't see Dr. West approving of her slore ass. Yuck. Kanye pick up the remaining marbles and take a step back and have a seat please, thank you.
*Crackie is growing up*
we're the same age and i still pretty much look fresh and the same as i did 10 years ago i don't understand why this bitch feels the need to alter everything and worry about wrinkles when the real aging process is only just beginning for her, i wonder what she will look like in a few years when she'll really need some of these already performed procedures, it feels she almost has done more than her freakishly looking mother ALREADY!and what about her petrol-burn-victim faced father?! how can you look at those "successful examples" each day of your fucking life and still want to also do stuff to your own face????
Those pictures are beyond unflattering. WTF is she thinking? How is this "glamorous"?
MK - only a few posts away we had the adorableness of pit bull puppy friend and now this vapid,useless,piece of trash???
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
This idiotic bitch. MK, only your writing and "Kanye's puckering pussay" make this worthwhile, lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠♡░░░░
Dlisted is a finalist! http://2013.bloggi.es/ Voting closes March 17.
This is effing disgusting. I thought this was a new sex tape scene. She is the ugliest ugly cryer around.
Omg. This is one of the worst things I have seen on this site. I can't believe such a thing exists as Vampire Facelift. And it looks like it hurts. Dumb bitch.
Vapid cunt.
Yeah, I said it.
I'm not a bio genius, but... I don't understand how platelets could give you a facelift. Surely she is getting paid for this shit.
$1,000
Too bad she couldn't spring $10 for a box of condoms.
I have never seen anyone more narcissistic than her-well maybe Kanye-you are pregnant and injecting shit into your body? You have no idea the effect on your baby? What an ass you are
What a fucking idiot and what a waste of money. I think I'll stick to eating my beets and plant oils to keep my skin looking young.
Dr. Nick's website says the gel that's injected combines "hyaluronic acid fillers" and platelets. She's either not pregnant or dumb for undergoing such a procedure while pregnant. I mean, the baby's already plenty cursed without increasing the odds of a problem.
@ everyone who already mentioned this... She couldn't keep this questionable 'treatment' off camera, let alone question the necessary participation??! Forget that this is an "anti aging" crap treatment she is doing at "32". Wow. She has major psych issues, no laughing matter, really. Just fking no. I bow down and pay respects to my parents for somehow, regardless of stern upbringing, damn near abuse and teenage nightmare years and all, raised me to be self-possessed, self-aware, self confident and an introspective inquisitor.
She is as fked up as Rihanna. The both of them acting out at this stage in their lives. Just extremely sad.
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"Discussions about what is good, beautiful, noble, pure, true, could always go on. Why is that important? Because that is the only conversation worth having." C.Hitchens,1949-2011. *caprica six was/is here*
Fking the most beyond shit. Disgusting
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"Discussions about what is good, beautiful, noble, pure, true, could always go on. Why is that important? Because that is the only conversation worth having." C.Hitchens,1949-2011. *caprica six was/is here*
What Boomsy said.
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Maybe I'm a bit bitter, but this selfish sow pisses me off. All she has to do is just live her life and let people pamper her, yet she can't seem to go a single day without causing some sort of melodrama. All I'm asking for is a week without having to hear her name or see her face without actively trying to avoid it...is that too much to ask?
Submitted by what do i know on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 12:07pm.
This broad is the UGLIEST chick when she cries.
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Fucken A ....lmfao
@Lucifer_Sam, your avie is everything :D
Oh please, that's just Kim in her natural state after she hunted down and feasted on a deer.
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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson
I thought she tried this before she got knocked up?
It doesn't matter...one of these days she is going to go too far. She is going to end up dying from a botched procedure or have some super-serious complication that will disfigure her. Either way, she better watch it. Her bread and butter, what makes her the real money, is her slutty looks. If those go, she is FU*$ED!
Submitted by Craigypants on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 6:06pm.
She is a fucking idiot, nothing else needed.
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Those were my exact words when I read this shit.
She is a fucking idiot, nothing else needed.
Submitted by Thamar on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 3:37pm.
Is that you in your avie, Thamar? If so, very lovely. If not, also very lovely. :)
.....and in 10 years we find out this procedure GIVES you wrinkles.
This girl is so effing dumb.
This after her faked near miscarriage? Still injecting poisons and crap into her body. Her doctor permits this nonsense? This kid could be born seriously ill. She's not worried. That's just another E! series for her. Wow. She's dangerous and dumb as an ox!
What. A. Shallow. Cunt.
She's having a baby but she's still getting cosmetic treatments? You know what? All the Kardashians are awful creatures.
Just awful.
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"I swear, sometimes good dick is a thing of evil. It blurs your vision and screws with your brain.- MK, 01/17/13
Yes, the jokes really do write themselves! Signed, Satan
ugh does that Jonathon dude follow her ass around everywhere?!
www.twitter.com/so_infamous
Submitted by winniwins on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 1:55pm.
Submitted by Esteem on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 1:18pm.
Submitted by MoRgaNNo on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 12:58pm.
Anybody else notice that looks like an 18 gauge needle? No fuckin way is that going in someone's face unless they're gettin some shit pierced. Another publicity stunt from this stunt kween kraptacular.
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Agreed. That needle is the size that they use for marrow extraction and spinal taps right? And it's completely buried in thumbs 2 and 5? No fucking way. Fake shit for her show no doubt.
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Me three! Fakity fake fake. I'm no expert but the length and gauge looks like a needle used for extractions. I use a 22-20 on my horses (18 if the vaccine is thick)and the needle is less than half that length. I hope she has to answer some questions about this.
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That needle only held the blood/serum/placebo that was dripped on her face as the torture device steam-rolled over the skin (thumb #2).
I happened to watch this by accident last night and giggled as she cried about the pain. It's total bogus science and the 'wrinkle reducing' comes from the temporary swelling of the skin. Same effect as hemroid cream. Dumbass.
She is the most wretched pseudo-celeb alive. I feel overwhelming sorrow for her child...thank goodness the child will be raised by nannies!
Not quite "What to Expect While Your Expecting"
but it has a message for Kim
Wait, this is the same vacuous cunt who gave away that poor little prop kitten, Mercy, b/c she couldn't be bothered to get allergy shots after supposedly discovering she was allergic to cats, right?
She has a lot more money than sense. I wish someone WOULD try to charge me a thousand bucks to reinject my blood and plasma back in my face! Once I stopped laughing, I would have a few choice words to them.
Here's a thought- stop worrying so much about what you look like all the time. Worry causes wrinkles, self- involved mom-to-be Kim.
Good luck Kimye's spawn.
Submitted by CandyPerfumeGirl on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 1:25pm.
Why does a 32 year old who is objectively, her cunt personality and image aside, beautiful, need any kind of work done?
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It's that bitch mother of hers. That woman is a monster, hands down. I've seen an earlier episode where Kris Jenner was crying to all of her daughters because she thought she looked bad in a bathing suit.
Really? You're how old and care about that to the point you're crying to your teen daughters about it? That's a nice message. No wonder the whole Kunt Klan is image obsessed.
Submitted by Ophelias evil twin on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 10:44am.
That is up there with Stephenie Meyer saying she wanted to be a lawyer.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 11:13am.
I hope he does some dna tests on the kid. Assuming it isn't a burrito baby.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
No fucking way is THAT needle going in her face, unless they're lobotomizing what little is in there.
Submitted by Mel-Tang on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 12:55pm.
It would be so funny if the baby ended up rebelling and spent all its time and money serving the poor, refused plastic surgery, wouldn't be involved in showbiz... the Kartrashians would explode.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 11:35am.
When she has the baby, I would be totally okay if she wanted to wear the placenta like a second face.
hahaha. The fake placenta?
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 1:00pm.
IMO she just left the Nair on her face for too long.
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LOL!
Submitted by Esteem on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 1:18pm.
Submitted by MoRgaNNo on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 12:58pm.
Anybody else notice that looks like an 18 gauge needle? No fuckin way is that going in someone's face unless they're gettin some shit pierced. Another publicity stunt from this stunt kween kraptacular.
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Agreed. That needle is the size that they use for marrow extraction and spinal taps right? And it's completely buried in thumbs 2 and 5? No fucking way. Fake shit for her show no doubt.
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Me three! Fakity fake fake. I'm no expert but the length and gauge looks like a needle used for extractions. I use a 22-20 on my horses (18 if the vaccine is thick)and the needle is less than half that length. I hope she has to answer some questions about this.
If she wants to look better, she needs to remove those huge ass implants (and save your fake x-rays, bitch). She looks like a squat bowling pin. Not to mention that shit is fake as hell. If that needle was really that deep in her forehead, she'd have brain damage (not that anyone would notice)
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"If it was sea jasper, we all know it was our favorite ethics professor." LaChaylo
Is there anything worse than being a narcissist?? I don't think so.
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
Why does a 32 year old who is objectively, her cunt personality and image aside, beautiful, need any kind of work done? I mean ok if you are 50 or 60, I get it, you want to look refreshed, but at 32? What does she think her face will look like when she turns 50? it's one thing to get a facial (ha, not that one) or go to a spa and get an enzyme exfoliator, but injecting and experimental plastic surgery and just messing around with the structure and molecules of your face like that? at 32? In a way it is kind of sad actually. I mean this bitch has sunk so deep, she is willing to butcher her face for a dollar, a dick and a dream.
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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
Submitted by MoRgaNNo on Mon, 03/11/2013 - 12:58pm.
Anybody else notice that looks like an 18 gauge needle? No fuckin way is that going in someone's face unless they're gettin some shit pierced. Another publicity stunt from this stunt kween kraptacular.
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Agreed. That needle is the size that they use for marrow extraction and spinal taps right? And it's completely buried in thumbs 2 and 5? No fucking way. Fake shit for her show no doubt.
who the fuck tries this kind of procedure when they're pregnant? her face is already all jowly because of the work she's had done. and she should just do acupuncture!! this girl's a nut, for realz tho.
Fight club! Selling their own fat asses back to them!! In this case how appropriate that would be, fucktard.