That Trick Cressida Bonas Is Back!
This past summer, I waived Cressida Bonas away when she was spotted getting on Prince Hot Ginge at a club in London. Just like that wart on my taint, I didn't think Cressida would stick around for long. And just like that wart on my taint, she came back and it doesn't look like she's leaving anytime soon. Cressida Boner really showed me to not underestimate her skills at luring the hot ginger one, because here she is snuggling up to his ass on a ski slope in Switzerland yesterday.
I know, how can Prince Hot Ginge canoodle with a chick named after a mid-size Toyota sedan in public, in front of the cameras, in front of our eyes! How can a hot ginge be so cold? I want to scream the same thing my ex-boyfriend's mother screamed at him when he brought me home for dinner, "How dare you bring your WHORE into my house?!" The audacity! But whatever, that is just the jealousy talking.
I mean, look at this bitch's life. After a long day of skiing with PHG, she gets to warm her frozen hands on his piping hot flaming dick bush. Then after warming her frozen hands on his piping hot flaming dick bush, she gets to sip tea while the Original Fergie gives her the juice about THE QUEEN. Then after the Original Fergie gives her the juice about THE QUEEN, she gets to burn her tongue on PHG's stovetop nalgas. The life: she is living it!
But The Mirror and their insiders are wrong for calling her "the one." Unless she's a puppy wrangler who shoots vodka from her butt and can beatbox the European house song of his choice on command, she's not the one.
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Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 02/21/2013 - 8:40am.
MissAnn: yes, it was a pretty icky scandal, IMO. She was selling access to Prince Andrew.
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I always believed that Andrew was in on Fergie's selling access to him for money. Either Fergie was giving him some of the money, OR, he wasn't taking a cut, but knew exactly what Fergie was doing, and was on board with it.
(Andrew would be okay with Fergie selling access to him without giving him a cut because it meant she wasn't coming to him for money, and he in turn, wouldn't have to go to the Queen and ask for additional money to support Fergie. The Queen would just say "no" anyway).
The reason Fergie got all the blame was to protect Andrew, and by extension, the crown. Fergie is a fuck-up anyway, so her getting caught isn't that bad. If it had come out that Andrew was involved, it would have looked worse because he's the queen's son. Also, people would have wondered if other of the Queen's children/relatives were doing the same thing.
If hanging Fergie out to dry was a ploy to protect Andrew and the crown, they could only keep up the "punishment" for so long. After all, if Andrew was in on it too, that mitigates her responsibility in the situation. And, she might talk. So it makes sense to me that the Queen eventually let up.
Also, I've always believed that Beatrice and Eugenie went to William's wedding dressed like the Witches of Eastwick to protest their mother's banishment from the festivities.
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An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
My ex-friend's cousin had a little girl named Sequoia.
OT: I agree, Fergie is looking a bit rough these days. I guess she said screw this diet shit.
Damn. The original Fergie looks like she comes from
the planet "Damn"!
She fell off the Weight Watcher wagon hard.
Submitted by justjane on Thu, 02/21/2013 - 10:36am.
There must be a name-your-kid-a-Toyota craze happening. Saw on Toddlers & Tiara's or one of those child exploitation reality shows, a girl named Camry, but spelled "Camree".
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Can't wait for a kid named Tundra, RAV4, Highlander, Sequoia, or Landcruiser.
Proof positive that gingers don't age well.
TEAM Chelsy Davy
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"OBAMA PLEASE HELP ME I DON'T HAVE A JOB"
"NO SORRY BUT HERE'S SOME WEED AND A VOUCHER TO GET MARRIED TO YOUR UNCLE" THANKS OBAMA
Sucky 12/19
Submitted by joe shmoe on Thu, 02/21/2013 - 6:04am.
You should over-protect your kids however you like. :) But I skied out of bounds and through the trees for years and only hit my head on one once (after drinking). Wait a minute...
Janetrenowins : So funny, I was thinking the same thing! Like pulling off the cameltoe in ski pants takes mad skills.
There must be a name-your-kid-a-Toyota craze happening. Saw on Toddlers & Tiara's or one of those child exploitation reality shows, a girl named Camry, but spelled "Camree".
Okay:
1.) Fergie is looking like Rosie O'Donnell.
2.) I thought there was backlash that Waity Katie didn't work, so why is a blonde socialite, model and dancer a-okay now (at least Kate's parents are self-made)? I mean, let's face it. She doesn't really work. Her "jobs" don't support her. And her mom's marriage history is a hot mess and she was a bit of gossip rag main-stay in her hay-day. Being that the Royals go to such lengths to keep Fergie out, I'm surprised they're letting someone so close to her and like her in.
3.) I'm confused as to why I give a fuck, but yet, I do.
BOoo @Cressida.
William has the boring girl already. Prince Ginge needs to up his game and get himself a hot one...
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"Bye, Whore" -MK
MissAnn: yes, it was a pretty icky scandal, IMO. She was selling access to Prince Andrew.
My take on Fergie is that she is very likable and charming. I don't think she's a bad person. But I wonder if she isn't a little bipolar or something. I think she's on the far side of vivacious, and her track record with money makes me wonder about her impulsivity. But all in all, she seems like a good time gal, like Harry. And we need the Fergies and Harrys.
He looks miserable not a single smile in the whole string of photos including the ones of him "partying" at the club. He misses that hot sloppy mess Chelsy. All his women since her have been blonde clones. She showed out with her new beau and he just had to top her.
Now that Harry has been embroiled in a few embarrassing scandals it's silly for him to try and hold the moral high ground against his aunt. And anyway she's still his cousins' mom. As for Cressida, get that money and prestige girl! Nah, but seriously I hope she really loves him.
...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...
Aw man, I was hoping he'd get back with that hot, sloppy mess Chelsy Davy. I'd love to see that royal wedding - she'd show up with baggy eyes, reek of alcohol, tiara askew and half-way down the aisle the heel would come off her shoe. And some point during the royal celebration there would be a nip slip.
That Cressida chick looks like bland oatmeal.
Nobody wore helmets while on their bikes when I was a child, and I'm talking early 90s.
who's sucking on fergie's toes these days?
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Wow, Fergie looks like a ginge Rosie O'Donnell in the face. Poor gal.
Why is Fergie still in the picture? Literally and figuratively?! She did a lot of crap to piss off ANY family she would have married into. Her and Prince Andrew (do I have that right?) are long divorced. There was some kind of scandal with her several years ago concerning the royals, right?
Why is Harry hanging with Fergie? Did I miss something?
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"Somewhere, Jennifer Love Hewitt is vagazzling the words "FUCK MY LIFE" onto her crotch while deep throating a Pillsbury cookie dough roll".--MK
The hell kind of name is that? I seriously thought MK made up this name for her.
And I couldn't even tell that was Fergie. EEKKK!
these people are bores ---- next!
ahahahahah Brilliant post, whore <3, just brilliant
God damn, Fergie looks ROUGH. And from certain angles, this Cressida ho reminds me of Avril Lavigne.
The original Lady Red Bush always did look a little wide. They're both too young to settle down anyway so I doubt that "the one" will end up being the one.
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If anyone is going to pee on him it's going to be me.- Nicole Kidman
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Thu, 02/21/2013 - 1:03am.
The Original Fergie looks wide and rough. She's got like 4 layers on, too. It can't be that cold.
People skied without helmets for a century. Shit, they raced GS without helmets. Don't understand why they're essential now. It's not like motorcycles, football, or hockey: you can fall or hit your head and nothing happens 99% of the time.
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Stinks though when you're in that 1%.
See: Natasha Richardson :(
Although Michael Kennedy and Sonny Bono both of whom weren't wearing helmets apparently wouldn't have been saved by wearing one...
Skiing seems like a relatively safe sport but when my kids go they wear helmets. As I like to tell them, brains don't respond well to being bashed.
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What a chick. Why does she do that merely for fun????
6 qt crockpot pulled pork recipe
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She's got that Taylor Swift appeal and we all know what's up with that. We'll see how long she keeps the prince amused.
Maybe it's too early but I read this looking at the thumbs thinking the lady in red must be this "Cressida" and no wonder MK is so mad.
She is the sister of Harry's brother's former flame Bella. Wills was devastated when she dropped his and Kate got him on the rebound so I can see why Harry hasn't brought that trick home yet to his immediate family. I'd expect them go go through Fergi it is a outlaw relationship kinda because of Wills x factor. And Fergi is his cousins mom and they got the trick with Harry. Drama. She looks loopeykinda taylor swiftish, but is just what he is looking for. He has got to get married to hold on to his royal stability. As much as he says he dislikes it he is having a damn good time spending the taxpayers money traveling the world sexing up his women LOL. She will be his diana while Chelsy will come back into the picture later on as his Camilla.
She is the sister of Harry's brother's former flame Bella. Wills was devastated when she dropped his and Kate got him on the rebound so I can see why Harry hasn't brought that trick home yet to his immediate family. I'd expect them go go through Fergi it is a outlaw relationship kinda because of Wills x factor. And Fergi is his cousins mom and they got the trick with Harry. Drama. She looks loopeykinda taylor swiftish, but is just what he is looking for. He has got to get married to hold on to his royal stability. As much as he says he dislikes it he is having a damn good time spending the taxpayers money traveling the world sexing up his women LOL. She will be his diana while Chelsy will come back into the picture later on as his Camilla.
This is GREAT!! She is the set up by his cousins but Kate is not going to like drama because her sister was all up in William and dissed him leaving him with a broken heart and Kate got him on the rebound Bella is engaged now but Harry drumming up a "relationship" with Cress will bring the old flame back into the family and Kate cannot be liking that. I notice that the trick has not been seen with Will and Kate yet. Anybody here put any credibility in the rumors of Harry being bisexual?
She looks like a busted Marcia Brady.
Well, I guess Fergie is the argument for Harry not to find a "suitable" mate and instead go for the Koo Stark type, who I think might've worked out better for Randy Andy.
The Original Fergie looks wide and rough. She's got like 4 layers on, too. It can't be that cold.
People skied without helmets for a century. Shit, they raced GS without helmets. Don't understand why they're essential now. It's not like motorcycles, football, or hockey: you can fall or hit your head and nothing happens 99% of the time.
Wow that next to last shot she manages to pull off a camel toe in snow pants AND the "I look 42 but I'm really 30" look. Ouch. Harry should never let someone put a cock ring on it. He is too beautiful to be not be free. But he can do better than a ho like that.
These tags are fuckin awesome! Damn I love you, MichaelK. Never, ever one to mince words, EVER.
My point is, it's ridiculous to call any of Harry's girlfriends for the next 15+ years "the one".
And his family will hope that a marriage will settle him down - it won't.
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An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
Harry's not going to get married until
1) He's in his 40's, still fucking up like a 20-something
2) Has spent through his trust fund, and
3) His father announces that if he doesn't settle down, he'll be "cut off".
A marriage will be "arranged" for him (no one will trust Harry's judgement to choose a wife) with some suitable socialite, who, like Kate, wants a title and a life of luxury. She'll be reasonably attractive, and expected to look the other way when Harry cheats on her. The eventual divorce will be scandalous, and so will the tell-all book she writes about the royal family.
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An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
I thought the Duchess of Pork was persona non grata wif the casino royales after all her embarrassing escapades? Anyhoo, she looks like crap. Where are the Royal Cosmetic Surgeons?
You are faithful MK because this is all around meh. The puppy photo is adorable though. And I bet you secretly beamed at your ex-bf's mom, you hot ho! ;)
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Fergie needs a plastic surgeon, stat.
Oops I meant Katherine Jenkins, not Kathleen. Duchess Fergie looks more busted than ever.
I'm already on a two-day-a-week diet.
Is that that drunkie South African chick?
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Damn M.K.! The stuff people say to you, your life is like a telenovela, the drama!
On my own front, I had three old grumpy people ask me/sort of tell me, in a very hurried, pushy, arrogant way, one right after the other, if I would just move aside and let them go first at the library, to return a book, to complain to the librarian, and to jump ahead of me in line to check something out. Damn, oldies! WTF is your rush? Got to get everything done before death?!
I was polite, and said yes, but after three in a row you get a little p o'd. These are also the same people I notice who lay on the horn when you are in their way in the shopping mall parking lot. Calm down oldies.
And btw what happened to O. Fergie's face?
Lol on the helmet thing Hekki, I remember all those hot European ski bums in the Olympics with their hair flying.
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 02/20/2013 - 10:28pm.
Ugh, my mother MADE me wear my ugly helmet on my bike all the time. If I took it off I swear she was right there to bust me. In her defense a kid in my neighbor hood did die hitting his head. But still it was SO ugly! A scooter though when you are there is kinda silly.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
I thought he was with that singer Kathleen Jenkins........whateva
bitch looks haggis.
but then again, harry isn't a prize either.
Hekki-- You're not alone...my son doesn't wear a helmet when he rides his bike.
LMAO at the tags. Hand me my shank...
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012