IMPORTANT BREAKING NEWS: RiRi Scraped Her Knee
RiRi was in London last night for the launch of her fashion line, which is perfect for the Tampa Bay-area beach hooker who wants to look like she bought all of her ho shit uniforms at The Salvation Army in the early 90s, and while going to the after-party for her show, she scraped her knee. ESCANDALO, I know.
America's foremost literary journal of all things true Media Takeout (via HL, TMZ, DM and everywhere else) says that when RiRi and model Cara Delevingne were walking into The Box, some batshit crazy fan started screaming some stuff about Chris Brown while throwing a glass bottle of Lucozade at her. The bottle didn't hit RiRi, but all the chaos made her fall into a metal grate and the grate cut her knee right open. MTO says that RiRi's knee SLICED open, but I'm sure most of us have had razor cuts on our assholes that were deeper than that cut.
After the crazed fan tried to hit RiRi with a bottle, her bodyguard went after the bottle hurler and hurt his leg while doing so. The fan got away and RiRi's bodyguard had to go to the hospital for treatment.
There are thousands of pictures of RiRi going into and coming out of The Box last night and I couldn't find one picture of the crazed fan or a picture of a bottle flying at her head. So either it didn't happen or the crazed fan is a pap-proof ninja ghost. If that's the case, can't the crazed fan use their ninja-like powers to go after The Difficult Brown next time? Speaking of The Difficult Brown, England better pull in the welcome mat, lock the doors and turn off all the nights, because I have a feeling that Chris Brown is going to land on their shores after smelling RiRi's blood.
For even more RiRi fuckery, click here to see what happened when The Sunday Times Magazine lost their minds and put a whole lot of WRONG on their cover.
And more importantly, why is Cara Delevingne dressed like the sluttiest member of JJ Fad?
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Submitted by Hotmami on Sun, 02/17/2013 - 5:48pm.
I was never into the whole club thing, even when I was younger. Staying in with a good book, a good movie and some tea satisfies me much more.
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If you could stop stealing my life, that would be great.
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass!
Same here. All you'll find int the clubs is trouble.
Well, I'll bet the neighbors are just LOVIN' this!--Mama.
It's like, I should feel pity for her because of her abusive dad and the whole prostitute thing, but...it's like being so messed up makes her proud.
I think I'm rambling.
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Every saint has a past and
Every sinner has a future
Submitted by misslainey on Sun, 02/17/2013 - 5:45pm.
Giant eyeroll. Everything in her life is dramatic. Damn, I'd get sick of that shit, but she is one of those women whose lself esteem is so low that the only way to feel good is to attract drama. Bored with her. She is a marginally talented one-trick pony.
^^^^^^^^
You sure got the "trick" part right!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
I was never into the whole club thing, even when I was younger. Staying in with a good book, a good movie and some tea satisfies me much more.
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Every saint has a past and
Every sinner has a future
Giant eyeroll. Everything in her life is dramatic. Damn, I'd get sick of that shit, but she is one of those women whose lself esteem is so low that the only way to feel good is to attract drama. Bored with her. She is a marginally talented one-trick pony.
Submitted by ibnsmother on Sun, 02/17/2013 - 4:29pm.
I don't get the Rhianna Princess Di thing.
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It's absurd. Camille Paglia is a controversial, yet respected social commentator. But saying RiRi is the new Di, is BEYOND reaching.
The paps like them both. The similarities end there, IMHO.
And that "fashion line" is awful.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Cara Delewhatever looks like frosted ass. Why is she successful? Oh yeah, she's the Lana Del Rey of models - "daddy bought my career."
Submitted by Craigypants on Sun, 02/17/2013 - 5:17pm.
Do these people ever stay home? They are out every night.
People who are out every night use it as evidence that they have a life, when, if they did, they wouldn't be out every night.
Christ on crack, RiRi, if you're gonna fall down, FALL ON THE FAT WOMAN.
☆☆☆☆
Do these people ever stay home? They are out every night.
Submitted by Hotmami on Sun, 02/17/2013 - 4:44pm.
The rugburn scab on my knee looks worse than that.
I believe I have a permanent scar on one knee. Not sure why only the one, lol
I never thought i would say this but Riri should be handing out fashion tips to at least one person, namely that Cara-dela-whatsit, model type with the huge Lourdes Leon eyebrows.
Don't worry. She'll forgive the sidewalk and continue using it.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahaha. Bitch was scurred.
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Every saint has a past and
Every sinner has a future
I read this, and honestly, it’s not the severity of her injury, or lack thereof, but just the severity of how insanely stupid people ACTUALLY are. I know we make snarky jabs at these people on here, and whatnot, but I don’t think the lot here think it’d be right or appropriate to do this if we saw these people (who ARE strangers) in person. I mean what the fuck???
However this story did make me laugh:
http://www.tmz.com/2013/02/17/chris-brown-gang-member-los-angeles-video-...
like how when it’s the Frank Oceans, Rihannas and Drakes he acts all hard and tough, but when it’s a supposed gangmember who threatens to bust a cap in his ass, he takes the “humble” route. Yea Fist, thanks for further proving exactly how big of a coward you truly ARE.
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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson
You know she was giving The Difficult Brown a beej and THAT's why her knee "sliced" open. Bitch can't stay away from that turd.
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Steven Tyler does White Oprah drag better than White Oprah does White Oprah drag. - MK
Lucozade doesn't come in a glass bottle, its a sports drink a la Gatorade but sooooo much better.
Low-down ho's always have scraped knees. And bruised legs. Drunk ass skank
Change is coming through my Shadow
Please, bitch is a well-known drunk. She probably fell and blamed it on a white guy.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Carla looks like Elle Fanning in some pics:
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6sfmxBI5n1rpwl7eo1_500.jpg
And just a plain old hot mess in others
I bet it's a cover story. The "crazy fan screaming about Chris Brown" thing just happens to depict the critical as violent loonies, huh?
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
The rugburn scab on my knee looks worse than that.
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Every saint has a past and
Every sinner has a future
A clothing line is better than that shit music she makes. At least I can ignore the clothes. I can't ignore the music every time I turn on the radio and my ears are assaulted by her screeching.
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What separates us from animals is that we don't use our tongues to clean our own genitals.
Gotta give it to her -- great legs, great bod.
The trick in the Gucci shirt looks like a five cent hooker.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Lovely. Even their fans are violent.
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A Lannister always pays his debts.
Considering what a skank she is, that cut is probably from her being on her knees blowing her bodyguard just because.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
I scraped my knee this evening too, chasing after my 2 year old nephew - first time I've fallen in my favourite MiuMius.
I don't get the Rhianna Princess Di thing.