Screw The Leg, It’s All About The Side Thigh Now
The fame whoring leg move died the day after St. Angie Jo did it at the Oscars and then it woke up and quickly died again when JLo did it, and now it’s definitely covered with grave dirt, because Michelle Williams has ended the trend by bringing us a new trend. At the Hollywood premiere of Oz: The Great and Powerful (which sadly isn’t about Dr. Oz’s eternal search for the perfect banana-shaped shit) last night, Michelle Williams wore a dress that was business in the front and party on the side.
Michelle wore some Prada window panel covered with mirrored flowers and when she turned to the side, she gave hos a peak of her memaw chonies. This works for me, because she can squat a piss out almost anywhere with ease and because you should always look like you’re ready for a pool party. I had this friend in high school who wore a bikini under every damn outfit during the summer, because she always wanted to be ready to tan at a moment’s notice. Or maybe she was an underage on-call stripper and needed to wear her uniform underneath her clothes at all times. That’s possible.
So the side thigh is officially in. Everybody grab your skirts, dresses, pants, culottes, whatever and slit the side of that shit so your side thigh is always showing. I want to see all the side thighs.
Obviously, Mila Kunis, Rachel Weisz and James Franco didn’t get the memo, because they kept their side thighs to themselves last night. But James Franco did float into the premiere on a balloon that was filled with more hot air than him. That’s an accomplishment!