Beyonce's Publicist Wishes These Hot Pictures Didn't Exist
Beyonce keeps a Beyonce library of all things Beyonce, but I guess these pictures don't have a place there.
After BEYONCE: THE CONCERT (with special guests Kelly Rowland, that other one and some football players) on Sunday night, Buzzfeed did a post on what they thought were the "33 Fiercest Moments" from her show and that post included 7 priceless pictures of her getting into it. Beyonce's publicist Yvette Noel-Schure didn't like any of those pictures and after a phone call with Buzzfeed, sent this email:
Thanks for my taking call. As discussed, there are some unflattering photos on your current feed that we are respectfully asking you to change. I am certain you will be able to find some better photos.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/lyapalater/the-fiercest-moments-from-beyonces-halftime-show
The worst are #5, 6, 10, 11, 12, 19 and 22.
Thank you very much.
Yvette forgot to add: "PS - If you don't, the Illuminati is coming for you!"
These aren't even unflattering to me. These are the best! I don't know which one I like more: the "giving birth in a wind tunnel as a robber is sticking her up" move (see: above) or the "riding a hog while inhaling dirty ass" move or the "GODDAMN! I said just the tip" move?
Team Beyonce wants to drop these pictures off the side of the planet, but I want to print them all out and wallpaper every wall of every building with them. I should ask the forgotten children of Destiny to help me. It's not like they're doing anything.
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She needs to stop fucking up her face with surgery.
Also, I don't find her sexy or interesting at all- she lacks something & is Just a pretty robot
Her unflattering expressions are the result of her trying to be 'fierce' while doing that spastic shit that she calls dancing. Maybe if she actually concentrated on putting on a decent performance, she wouldn't look so jacked in the face.
Also, since this is on the heels of her saying that she has to fuck her nerves away by jumping on Joe Camel, why doesn't she just chalk up her facial expressions to that? Like, 'what? these are my sex faces!'
speaking of BeyBey channeling Tina Turner:
http://www.afropunk.com/photo/tina-turner-beyonce
Tina would have never asked for photos of herself getting into it to be taken down.
Tina knew beauty comes from within...
a monster has officially been born.
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God don't like ugly.
If everyone was like me, she would be working as a waitress. She can take that puddin' all the way out of the leather teddy, wave it around, and do the squats, and I couldn't be bothered to watch.
Girl, you boring...
She looks like her mother and that's not a compliment.
Old lady 'O' face. Icky.
She makes the same face when she blows her nose.
@WinterOwl, I agree with you there. Too bad there wasn't a major wardrobe malfunction. Now THAT would have been something to talk about. ;-)
Tired, old, worn out man in drag.
Of the pics posted here, in #3 BeyBey girl looks like a blonde Michelle Rodriguez during a drunken lesbian rage.
It's really a shame what she is doing to her nose and face.
Oh come ON. She makes crazy faces while performing, of course there will be some funny shots! Get the fuck over it.
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People ask me why I never find a place to stop and settle down down down
But I never wanted all the things that people need to find their lives lives lives
You see we're born, born, born to be alive
Another photo of Tan Mom? Actually, "Tan Mom" is starting to sound like and look like Vietnamese take-out.
Her publicist should be more concerned about dressing Bey in A line skirts to hide those massive nut cracker thighs instead of prancing about in french cut bikini bottoms.
Submitted by City Barbie on Tue, 02/05/2013 - 10:39pm.
Why is everyone still talking about Beyonce's half time show? Who gives a fuck anyway?
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I can only speak for myself but football sucks and I don't watch the games. I'm more interested in the performances.
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I like to smile, smiling's my favorite! : )
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
Lol YES!
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I like to smile, smiling's my favorite! : )
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
Why is everyone still talking about Beyonce's half time show? Who gives a fuck anyway?
Those nostrils are giving Falcor a run for her money...that is one FUCKED UP nose job.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
MK's fucking descriptions are hilarious.
I bet Jay Z likes smelling her sweaty feet after shows. SICKO!
Dear God give me struummff to desk with this tornado of ego
"GODDAMN! I said just the tip!" move"
made me LOL. That is a strangely accurate description of her expression!!
leaf blower face
As much as I disliked it, her show sure has provided comedic gold in the past few days. This 33 things post is kind compared to the funny crap you could compile of all the stupid faces she made.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Tue, 02/05/2013 - 10:15pm.
Why does she want to be white so badly?
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Because, supposedly, famous black guys always want a white girlriend.
If you don't want unflattering photos, don't accept a superbowl gig and fail at being fierce. She just looked like she was putting so much energy at looking angry to dispel the "haters". Girl, fucking bye!
They really complained about some unflattering pics on a blog which published a whole story about "fierce Beysus"?!
BWHAHAHAHA
"Unflattering Photos"? This is what your client does. This what she's doing for the next six months. This is how you get paid.
God that nose. Her old one had nice contours.
#2 is giving me Willow Smith can suck it while trying not to shart myself in church.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Bey is channeling Tina Turner in the main picture. Except that her legs are heavier and her talent, smaller.
Why does she want to be white so badly?
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
#2 and 3 are outstanding. I was telling Withy that in person she is cute and tiny. Watch me eat my words as I toddle to the bench. Jeeebus. LMAO
Now is the time. You're not promised tomorrow. -PR
I thought she looked a bit like Jasmine Guy on "Dead Like Me", but then I realized that no one is a fierce as Jasmine Guy and I slammed hand in a drawer to make a point of remembering that.
Maybe she should stop making that fucking face then, damn why's she gotta look so angry. She really looks to be in her late 30s its probably the new nose
Beyonce WHO?
I think Kelly looked amazing.
The nose job was done to make her look better when she does magazine covers and becomes white. Think about it.
JFC what a bad nose job! How does one breathe out of that skinny beak?
Also, there's something amiss with her brow line.
I sure as hell wouldn't want to be her publicist...
Not for all of the money in the world.
And Lmao @ everyone's comments!
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...the end
If you look closely, that's not Beyonce. It's some Puerto Rican dude in drag. Take the wig off, and look closely at 'his' face. It's a whole other person.
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
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Queen B
The B stands for Butch
Man, she looks like a male boxer on some of the pics.
And that nose job really doesn't work.
Bitch, be thankful you got to perform at the fucking halftime show and go back to sucking on your husband who looks like one of the guys on the left side on the evolutionary scale.
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Raising the bar for lowering standards since 1982.
It's as if the don't want pictures of her looking more Afro-American than White.
"Thanks for my taking call."<---Dyslexia is a bitch huh?
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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson
19 looks like she is pushing out a massive fart.
Epilepsy is certainly nothing to laugh at. That being said, she should probably stop using strobe lights during her shows to save her publicist some time afterward.
MK I love you. Your descriptions of the pics made me laugh until I cried. This ups the bar on future Dlisted posts! Keep up the good work.
Typical Beyonce. One more reason to hate this ostentatious bitch.
Ha Ha Ha In pic #3, she has Paris Hilton's nose.
Memo to all: everyone hates a control freak. Publicists are stupid these days. LET. It. Ride. Beyonce creates her own drama and it will KILL HER CAREER. DUH.
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
Her publicist should be more worried about getting her to lay off the plastic surgery. Remember what her nose used to look like? She is dangerously close to having a Jackson nose. Stop now Bey.