Hot Slut Of The Day!
The extremely hot, trouble making inmate who tries to destroy Claire Danes in Brokedown Palace!
I don't know why, but every time Claire Danes' finest film Brokedown Palace (emphasis on "broke down") comes on cable, I have to watch it until the end. I already know that the hot Australian dude seduces Claire and Kate Beckinsale and unwillingly turns them into drug mules. I already know that they get christened into the lady prison by getting haircuts that give them a special kind of "just stepped out of the cell" glamour. I already know that even though they make escaping from a Thai lady prison look really easy, those stupid bitches still get caught. I already know that Claire Danes boo hoo hoos in front of the King of Thailand and it gets Kate out of the lady prison. And I already know that I'm going to get up and do a chanting dance when that Sarah Brightman song plays at the end. I already know all of this, but I still watch that mess of a movie. I watch, because I love lady prison movies (Caged Heat II is a masterpiece) and because I love Claire's arch rival in it.
As far as my weed smoke-drenched mind knows, they never say her name, but she is everything in it. From the beginning, she screws with Claire Danes. Every lady prison needs a head bitch and she is it. She stuffs fish heads in Claire's bedroll, ruins Claire's escape plan and gets Claire and Kate to touch the forbidden fruit. I think she hated Claire, because Claire was close to Kate and she wanted to make Kate her prison wife. Watch the master at work (although, that's really not saying much since Claire and Kate are so damn dumb in this that they'd put their hand into a fire if you told them a Twinkie was at the bottom of it):
Brokedown Palace was a flop, but they should still make a sequel starring my favorite Thai prison queen. They shot Brokedown Palace in the Philippines, so Claire Danes can't be in my dream sequel, because her dumb ass got banned from the country for saying Manila is a "ghastly city" and smells like cockroaches. My dream sequel will be even better without Claire Danes' crying all over the place.
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The original bee: Transiberian! Yes, that film was AWESOME! I loved all the elements surrounding the smuggling. I think its the most recent of this type that I actually loved!
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
I loved this movie! I cried throughout bc I equated the relationship between Claire and Kate w my sister and I. Also I loved the soundtrack.
Reform School Girls!!!!!! Starring my hero Wendy O Williams. Co-starring Devine. Has to be the best womens prison movie. Has to!!
Submitted by Husbands_and_Wives on Sat, 01/26/2013 - 5:46pm.
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Saw Midnight Express on late-night cable and it was harrowing! Those teef!
I don't remember much about this movie but I think I liked it. *ducks* As for women's prison, Almodovar's High Heels has a scene with the prisoners dancing, lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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YES MK- in my mind we were watching Brokedown Palace on cable at the same time. That bitch has it OUT- escandalo. And Kate looks like a little gutter rat :)As always, Clair is stuffed up.
MK, this reminds me, you need to make the vietnamese hooker from Full Metal Jacket a HSOTD!
And wow, how many plastic surgeries has Kate Beckinsale been through?
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"Sal, darling, you are the reason some women go gay. ♥" - Submitted by Dog on Fri, 07/09/2010 - 6:32pm.
Midnight Express is def the classic drug smuggler locked up abroad movie. As for female prison flicks I'll have to go with "Stranger Inside" starring some randoms and Rain Phoenix as a dazzling chola enchantress in cornrows. It's where I learned, "A fight! A fight! a nigga and a white! the white can't fight cause the nigga's aiight!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tc6GQo0g1wo
...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...
"You like? Go take..."I love this stupid movie.
Anyone seen Transsiberian? THAT's a darn fine example of a great smuggling movie!
It took me forever to see this. I was mad at Claire Danes for giving up Angela Chase for the longest time.
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Lucifer_Sam: "Do you EVER post anything worthwhile on this site? Do you EVER have a point to make?" In case anyone else was wondering, the answer is "No."
Love this movie and cry everytime LOL There's this Filipina lady I know who's worked as a prison guard back in the Philippines. She gives the meanest cut through a bitch side-eye, bitch don't play.
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Someone by the bar keeps looking at us dancing. I see him starring at me, I see what he wants be
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Mr. Mercury ♥
brokedown palace was awful. the acting was Lifetime network bad
Haven't seen the movie and when I hear the title I always confuse it with the fantasy novels "Dinner at Deviant's Palace" by Tim Powers or "Brokedown Palace" by Steven Brust.
However I do enjoy watching that "Scared Straight" juvie prison experience.
Submitted by Hekki on Sat, 01/26/2013 - 12:56pm.
But I DO have to watch last Sunday's "Downton Abbey".
You mean because Mr. Bates is in gaol (a rather stylized one)? Sadly, that show goes downhill season by season. It still has its moments, but that's all anymore.
elanenergy: ooooh, Midnight Express! That movie freaked me out. I cried when they hanged the guy's cat. It's hardcore.
The gold standard of lady prison movies is "Born Innocent," a 1970s TV movie starring Linda Blair. I think you can watch it in its entirety on YouTube.
@ TexnDoc- I love Locked Up Abroad. If you like to read I suggest Damage Done. True story about two Aussies locked up in Thailand. The author admits he was an idiot and pays dearly. Excellent read.
It's weird but when I've been in Koh Phi Phi, Thailand a few Cafe's seem to have this movie and The Beach on a loop. All the wanna-be backpackers sit for hours and watch them (with their packs on the ground next to them -like a fashion statement)instead of actually hiking around and " experiencing" things. Funny.
Haha...I just realized that I have seen it. It was so good, I forgot! Lol
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Every time this movie comes on, I skip it. Prison phobia.
But I DO have to watch last Sunday's "Downton Abbey".
Sounds like a perfect movie for today! I've never seen it, but any movie where Claire Danes is in a Thai prison and harrassed by an evil bitch is my kind of movie!! :P
I just saw "Malibu's Most Wanted" with Jamie Kennedy for the bajillionth time, and it was just as funny as the first time. I love that movie for some reason. Haha
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I love the drug mule series "Locked Up Abroad" on YouTube. Or "Banged Up Abroad" in the UK. Favorite one is the teen who gets caught in Bangladesh.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-lZqaG1_IE (skip to 25:00 for the arrest). It's always funny they're always carrying 40 pounds of cocaine and whether it's Brazil or Bangladesh or Nepal when then get arrested and told they're being sent to prison they always cry and say "For what!?"
MK, this is great. You should make this film retrospective a regular feature of the blog. Yeah, this movie. So....WTF. The classic drug smuggling film of merit is Midnight Express....but it's not a lady prison setting. LOL
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
I didn't know cockroaches had a smell. But then, for a long time I didn't know that some of them could fly or bite. Creepy little critters. I've found some on my parents' back deck (they live in the almost-country) that were half a foot long! ACK!
Ah, the poor-Westerners-caught-in-an-"uncivilized"-country genre- my favorite! Not.