Afternoon Crumbs

NKOTB, 90 Degrees and Boyz II Men have blown the panties off of every 30-something by reuniting for a tour called The Package. Yes, their tour is called The Package and I don’t see one package on any of the ads. False advertising. – Just Jared

Brit Brit’s chichis are confused, scared and suffocating, because they forgot what it’s like to sit in a bra – Lainey Gossip

Not pictured: Casper Smart in the ocean, smiling, because he dog paddled without his water wings on for the first time – Hollywood Tuna

Jimmy Olsen gets a sex change in Man of Steel – The Superficial 

If Rachel Dratch ever had a lifelong dream to run the Double Dare obstacle course, she sort of fulfilled it by running the Julia Roberts obstacle course – Towleroad

Leonardo DiCaprio is pressing pause on his acting career, because he really wants to focus on his true love: humping Angels – Celebitchy

The time I mistook Paul Rudd for David Duchovny – The Berry 

The time I mistook Basement Baby for a subdued Lauryn Hill – Necole Bitchie 

Who hasn’t taken a bath with clothes on their body and a face full of make-up on their face? Monica Bellucci knows what I’m talking about – Drunken Stepfather

My mom would be honored that Suri Cruise is wearing a jacket made from the faux sheepskin seat covers in her old Buick – Popsugar

Olivia Munn’s ass in a bikini in case you forgot what that looked like – Popoholic

Well, this is a really smart way to get Lindsay Lohan to move to rural Ireland – Gawker

A baby is coming out of Shakira’s body right now – I’m Not Obsessed 

When motorboating goes terribly, terribly wrong – The Frisky 

Malia Obama should’ve followed that side-eye up with a wig snatching – Crunk + Disorderly

This is probably what Lindsay Lohan uses to tell time – Towleroad

Benedict Cumsinbtches promises a mighty Cumberbulge in Star Trek – Videogum

Red, White and NO – ICYDK

Only Kunty Karl’s lesbian brides would look like creepy virgin vampire sisters – Queerty