This Is What Michelle Obama Wore To The Inaugural Ball

CNN is showing scenes from the Inaugural Ball and the DJ played “Let The Music Play” for the crowd. How I wish the camera would’ve panned to Michelle Obama dancing on top of a go-go box as a strobe light flickered behind her. I really hope the DJ plays “When I Hear Music” next.

Anderson Cooper, Piers Morgan and a bunch of fashion-loving queens of CNN lost their minds, found their minds and lost their minds again when Michelle Obama sashayed out tonight wearing A DRESS by designer Jason Wu! Michelle Obama chose a Jason Wu dress for her last Inaugural gown, so how could she wear a Jason Wu dress again? The main fashion bitch on CNN slapped herself and pinched her titty, because she couldn’t believe that Michelle Obama wore Jason Wu for a second Inauguration. This has never happened! This is history in the making! This changes everything! The world stopped, Mel Gibson hugged a Jew, Lindsay Lohan put down the vodka bottle for a second, John Travolta slipped Kelly Preston the tongue without getting the heaves and it’s all because Michelle Obama wore Jason Wu AGAIN! As soon as you pick the pieces of your brain off the floor and stick them back in your head through your ear holes, watch Michelle Obama’s HISTORIC!!! gown in action:

Usually, I’m not really into the First Lady’s Inauguration gown, because I only like gowns that are covered in rhinestones, see-through or slit all the way up to the left nipple (aka classy ones), but I kind of like this one. But I have a feeling that in a few weeks, I’ll be doing Michelle Obama’s signature “side eye and roll” at this dress, because copy cats of it will be everywhere. You’re going to see on every bridesmaid at every wedding. You’re going to see one on every 11th grade at the prom. And I’m sure that right now, my cousin has pulled a white halter dress out of her closet, dyed it red and has glued patches of crushed velvet all over it. I just hope she doesn’t wear it with her clip-on bangs. Not today. Not ever.