Night Crumbs

Guess who got this temporary eagle tattoo? Hint: It was probably drawn on using actual blood from an endangered bald eagle and it’s better than your tattoo – Lainey Gossip

Presenting Bill Clinton’s “the things I’d like my cigar to do to her” face – The Superficial 

Miserable-looking Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutchie may look miserable in Chicago – Celebitchy

Red, white and CHICHICHIIIIIIS – Hollywood Tuna  

Amanda Seyfried as Linda Lovelace looks more like a young Shelley Duvall as Rose McGowan – Towleroad

You can choose to look at Miley Cyrus in a bikini or you can put your eyeballs on Thor’s anaconda arm – Drunken Stepfather

On this Inauguration Day, I wish I was wearing an exquisitely classy American flag outfit – The Berry 

Olivia Munn’s got metal brows over her tits – Popoholic

This news is extremely shocking coming from a completely stable, classy and sane couple like Jenelle Evans and Courtland Rogers – ICYDK

Katy Perry brought her wayfarer-wearing tampon to the Inauguration today – Just Jared

Okay, so how many times do you think Al Roker sharted when he met Joe Biden? – Buzzfeed

Leonardo DiCatchAHo is a brave bitch for standing in front of Naomi Campbell when she’s got her weapon of choice in her hand – Popsugar

George Stephanopoulos thinks all black old men with snowy beards look the same – Celebslam

I really though Nicole Richie was carrying her kid around in a shopping bag. I was like, “That’s a good idea!” – I’m Not Obsessed

Mario Cotillard as a pre-waxed Kardashian – Cityrag

Things that will exist: Girls, the reality show – Videogum

What in the name of Amy Winehouse as a slutty gladiator is Kat Graham wearing? – Moe Jackson

Kanye West’s ex-piece is telling us something we already knew – Crunk + Disorderly

The 70s had Bob Marley for a stoner idol and we have RiRi. It really is the end of days. – Hollywood Rag