And Finally...Anne Hathaway
I promise that this will be my last 2013 Golden Globes post of the year (no, it won't be) and after this we shall never speak of the 2013 Golden Globes again (yes, we will), but how can I not post about the only reason why the 2013 Golden Globes happened in the first place? The 2013 Golden Globes only existed to pay tribute to the greatest singing and acting talent of this and every other generation!
Of course, Anne Hathaway won Best Supporting Actress for Les Miserables and after she burped out a "blergh," she said, "Oh my gosh, this is happening." Bitch, stop. Don't act like you didn't build a replica of the Golden Globes stage in your spare room just so you could practice your acceptance speech for weeks beforehand. Anne totally screened her speech for test audiences and asked them if she should keep in the line, "Thank you for this lovely blunt object that I will forevermore use as a weapon against self doubt." They voted to keep that line in, obviously. Anne continued to blabber on and she went overtime, but she wasn't done yet.
In the clip above, Les Miserables is named the Best Comedy Or Musical (Note: Les Miserables qualified as a comedy and a musical thanks to Russell Crowe's singing) of the year and before the movie's producer can even start his speech, Anne hijacks the mic and mouth farts out all the names of hos she forgot to thank. Anne looked so nervous, crazed and anxious when she hopped on the mic that I thought she was going to scream, "He's wearing a bomb! Everybody run!" But it was a different kind of emergency. Anne just needed to thank more people. That's all.
After the show ended, Anne jumped back on the mic and continued to thank people while the crew struck the set and moved all the chairs out of the ballroom. The crew then picked up the part of the stage that Anne was on and moved it to the back of a truck as she kept thanking people. That truck is now somewhere between Los Angeles and Barstow, and Anne is still on it, thanking people.
Here's Anne, wearing a lovely dildo cozy, while posing with some of her Les Miserables castmates last night.
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She probably thought that "blunt object" line was cute, but it shows how fucking insufferable she is. What will she call her Oscar (though I hope she loses out of sheer malice) "this lovely aureate item I will forever use to masturbate my ego."
I hope she falls down a well and chips all her giant teefs.
Dustin Hoffman has morphed into Tony Bennett.
Submitted by idiots drive me loco on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 8:07pm.
this cunt, Slutty Swifty, and Goop.
Which one do you marry, kill, and bone?
marry Goop [can get in the BEST restaurants]
bone SS [she's used to the pump and dump]
kill this one [obvious]
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
MK, you are absolutely the best. I am having THE day from HELL, and you made it much better. How could I not laugh my proverbial ass of when you said that AnnE was wearing a "....lovely dildo cozy".
Just SO funny. I was amazingly terrified regarding my surgery in two days, but you gave me temporarily relief.
Well done.
this cunt, Slutty Swifty, and Goop.
Which one do you marry, kill, and bone?
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What was Pimp Mama Kris going to say? That Daniel Craig worked to get the career he has while the Kardashians' fame was handed to them on a glove that didn't fit?--MK
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AnnE outdid herself with her self loving soul sucking the sun and warmth out of LA... Ann with an E didn't disappoint. She has a new portable device to have sesssy self love time with... So she has no doubt.. She mowed down a film director and producer.. Assaulted a cast and crew with a mic.. And she wrestled Amanda Seyfried live. Amanda lost.
All over my Facebook last night folks were posting how much they hate her (myself included). These folks are from all walks of life. She annoys every demographic!
I said a lot of nasty things about her last night before I admitted that I'm just jealous. jealous of Anne Hathaway! I probably would seem really fake, too.
Last night, Ann (with an E!!!) Hathaway demonstrated EXACTLY why I want to cut a bitch whenever her name comes up.
It's not some irrational hatred or jealousy of her success or our need to tear down people after we've built them up. Everything she did and said last night is the reason I can't fucking stand her.
After hearing her speech I hate her even more so. She thinks she's all that but really she's classless. Who makes a speech like she did? It was awful and trashy. I REALLY hope she loses.
Adele's speech cracked me up!!
I used to kind of like her but honestly, I can't fucking stand this fake annoying cunt anymore. And her LOOK AT ME behavior's only gonna get worse between now and the Oscars. Grabbing the mic (and thus stealing the producer's thunder) and assaulting Amanda S was nauseatingly selfish and grating. Amanda should have shoved her aside and told her to lose the Jack-O-Lantern creepy grinning leer, too. WTF.
I hope AH loses the Oscar but you know she won't.
"The way Anne grabbed onto Amanda and held on was very passive-aggressive domination."
^That. Made me uncomfortable to witness it. I was hoping A would have sunk her elbow into Anne-with-an-E's ribcage.
Submitted by bambam on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 7:22pm.
Submitted by heima on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 7:15pm.
Who's the woman with Hugh Jackman in those red carpet pictures, wearing those hideous platform shoes? His mom?
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That's his long time wife and good for him I say.
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Oh, thanks. I guess she's older, according to Wikipedia she graduated from the American Academy of Dramatic Arts in 1981, so probably she's older than him.
Nice to see a quite normal couple in Hollywood.
She WISHES she was as good an actor as DDL...this bish.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Lope - you are correct in your wondering. This FantinE character has nearly no screen time compared to Amanda S., Helena Bonham Carter or the newcomer Samatha B. Yet, we're forced to accept that AH is the phenomenal one of these women? Even her daughter in the movie has more screen time. If only I was an Academy voter...
Submitted by heima on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 7:15pm.
Who's the woman with Hugh Jackman in those red carpet pictures, wearing those hideous platform shoes? His mom?
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That's his long time wife and good for him I say.
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fuck u dan snyder.
The way Anne grabbed onto Amanda and held on was very passive-aggressive domination.
What a cunt.
Unfortunately she's done too many movies with too many people to entertain thoughts of an Oscar backlash. It would be nice, but they vote their friends.
God damn, gurl. It's a big fucking deal, I get it. Take a page from Daniel Day-Lewis and tone it down a notch or two.
Who's the woman with Hugh Jackman in those red carpet pictures, wearing those hideous platform shoes? His mom?
Lmao, Amanda Seyfried's reaction was the best. Gritted teeth with such grace, gtf away from me Anne, haha
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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"That truck is now somewhere between Los Angeles and Barstow, and Anne is still on it, thanking people."
And another gem from the mind of Michael K. This is what keeps me smiling even in this world of crazy narcissist celebs :))
What is up with Mrs. Jackmeoff's outfit? And with hand in pocket? Is she digging for change? Picking a wedgie out of her box? Hiding her Madge hands?
What is that website that uses sock puppets to act out web threads? (I'm far too lazy too look it up) this whole comments section would be perfect for that. You horz are funny! And the sock puppets infinitely more deserving of am Oscar than dear old Ann.
Educate yourself on the badass, not-fuck-giving honeybadger, Olivia! ~MK
Poor Amanda -- I bet she had to use every ounce of restraint not to punch that b!tch out after being put in a choke hold like that :p
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Kitten Kaboodle - a Disney ho who did the ho stroll right ;)
Check out mah page, horz! ;)
https://www.facebook.com/OrderOfTheDimensions
LOL I am cracking up right now
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"I do not drink, do drugs, or lie" --Lindsay Lohan 2007
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:51pm.
I enjoyed the Marigold Hotel infinitely more.
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Yes, a really lovely and touching picture, plenty of chuckles here and there. Still, not worthy of a nomination to me. Had me wondering why.
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fuck u dan snyder.
Someone punch that fake bitch in the mouth.
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"Bye, Whore" -MK
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:49pm.
Orangina, "longest running" is a different story. Yes, I agree there. But not the oldest Broadway show, by far. :)
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My bad, but I pretty much have grammar dyslexia. I meant to say "longest running " but my brain farted out a different phrase.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:48pm.
Submitted by Gigaboob on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:38pm.
doesn't the show award go to the executives and staff, talent are just on stage as [obvious] contributors? if so, it truly was gauche for her to be the first at the mic ;-)
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Blergh, it surely was. But it was HER night, don't forget.
Anne should be put on horse tranquilizers at the next awards show ... might help.
Submitted by CoconutCoochie on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:44pm.
I don't know why everyone is hating on her for (supposedly) wanting an Oscar.
Even if that's the case, so what?
I have never, ever in my life seen someone campaign so hard for an Oscar, and I'm not super young. Kate Winslet was on the ho stroll 24/7 after Titanic and didn't do half the pushing that Anne is doing with the constant talk of her struggles. What's weird is that Fantine isn't really that big a part of Les Mis. I haven't seen this adaptation, maybe they overemphasized her part, but she was more a means to an end- getting the girl to her adoptive father. When you hear nothing from Amanda Seyfried, who really does have a main part, it's just bizarre.
Submitted by kiwikim on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:28pm.
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Don't forget prostitute, call girl, escort or showing the twins or some bush (the old days.) As this relates to Halle's oscar too, you can look it up to see how many winners/nominees there are who went this route.
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fuck u dan snyder.
Lord have Mercy, Hugh Jackman is so gorgeous!
Once again his wife fails with those shoes. I mean, those look like Shauna Sand heels for the geriatric set..
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"If you're going through hell, keep going" ~ Winston Churchill
anne, for fucks sake... take it down a notch, will you?
I enjoyed the Marigold Hotel infinitely more.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
i'm aboard the olivE oylE hate train.
shE is gauchE, tack-E, rudE, sElf cEntErEd time after time.
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
Orangina, "longest running" is a different story. Yes, I agree there. But not the oldest Broadway show, by far. :)
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Sometimes you kick, sometimes you get kicked
-INXS
Submitted by Gigaboob on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:38pm.
doesn't the show award go to the executives and staff, talent are just on stage as [obvious] contributors? if so, it truly was gauche for her to be the first at the mic ;-)
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:45pm.
AGREED. That was such a crap win. Decent movie maybe (I actually hated it) but Best Picture?! Hardly.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
AnnE, Uma was a BETTER Fantine.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by kiwikim on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:28pm.
It is silly. You've got to play in a movie about the Holocaust to win anything. Or be a battered woman. A raped woman. A dying woman. Something involving starving yourself for your role. Anne chose this as "oscar" material for sure.
Just don't be in a movie about two men in a loving relationship a 'la Brokeback because Tony Curtis and all the other old hacks that vote in Hollywood for these ridiculous awards don't like that shit. They want crap that speaks to their generation. Playing in that lost Anne an award.
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Brokeback Mountain's loss to "Crash" for best picture Oscar is one of the worst Oscar upsets of all time. Terrible.
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A Lannister always pays his debts.
Submitted by lislop on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:07pm.
How is she going to deal when she loses at the Oscars?
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to Amanda! :D or was she even nominated? WTFever...
I'd just love to know what Amanda is thinking during that photo shoot....
I don't know why everyone is hating on her for (supposedly) wanting an Oscar.
Even if that's the case, so what?
After all, as people we all strive to be the best at what we do, which means working hard to get a promotion, a raise, a better job, and there's nothing shameful about that... So why should she be any different? She's an actress, an Oscar is the ultimate reward, there you go.
Besides, I keep hearing that she really rocked that part.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:26pm.
I think she is beautiful, and very talented. However, she was so damn annoying last night, I wanted to punch her.
I am pretty sure Les Mis started in the 80's on Broadway. Hardly making it "one of the oldest Broadway shows of all time".
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I read something saying it was one of the longest running shows of all time. It was written in France in the the 1800s and has been adapted to Broadway. Anyway, the story (it was a book before it was a play) is really old. This article says it's the 4th longest running Broadway show of all time (out of a list of 100):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_the_longest-running_Broadway_shows
Submitted by vsminimoose on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:03pm.
She's jumping around back there and hugging people as if it's her movie....as if she created, wrote, produced, and directed the fucking thing.
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LOL, yes she was.
In most acceptance speeches where the honoree runs out of time, it's because the honoree spent most of the allotted time talking about him- or herself and left no time for the people who really matter, like the author or the honoree's spouse, kids, etc.
Am I the only one who hated Les Miz?
God send a bolt of lightning and take this bitch out! It was one thing when she won her award but when she went on after Les Miz won best musical...ugh...too fucking much. And I'm uncomfortable knowing she freebushed it last night.
*unwraps Werthers*