Olivia Wilde Is Going To Marry The Dude Who Brought Her Vagina Back To Life With His Peen
Olivia Wilde's marriage to that Italian prince dude ended about a year ago and Jason Sudeikis' marriage to his first wife ended about two years ago, but I guess they're both ready to try that marriage thing again. Jason gave Olivia a hitchin' ring during the holidays and after she said yes, they celebrated by putting on their track suits (with holes cutout for their genitals), tying on their running shoes and then fucking like Kenyan marathon runners. Olivia and Jason have been fucking like Kenyan marathon runners for a little over a year now. Olivia went on Twitter this morning to confirm that Jason will be her second husband:
Thanks for all the sweet congratulatory love, friends! And may I compliment your savvy use of that nifty engagement ring emoticon.
It felt like Olivia's divorce from that Italian prince dude was only finalized six seconds ago. Don't hos know that it's okay to hump each other naked without being married? Don't let my abuelita's words get to you. You won't ride on an orgasm wave to hell if you let the dick in before marriage. But then again, Jason's EMT dick did give CPR to Olivia's coochie and brought it back to life. Oh well, he'll make a perfect, and brief, second husband.
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Submitted by WithinReason... on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:26pm.
Yeah, you see...THAT pisses me off..that nonsense takes all the spotlight. Swift and her bfs really aren't that important imo.
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
Jason is an obvious - and very cute - homosexual.
Are there any nude photos of Jason?
JessicaGiovanna Thank you. Back at you.
I'm sorry princess.. If they'd only told us how hard life was going to be :(
Sending you a warm hug..
He just had to tell me about six times he wanted to be alone before I finally get it like a stupid person.
JessicaGiovanna yes, therapy for a year. In 2010, we separated for a year. It was hell for the kids and me. We decided to try again and I've been very happy since we got back together. I also saw a therapist on my own and changed a lot for the better.
princesspoppy, my husband and I just had that exact same conversation. Its hard. I'm the one that told him that I didn't love him, but I do care, and its true. We are in it for the kids, but I dont think either of us would be here if there wasn't any hope and, yeah, also some love. Have you done therapy? We have and it helped a little; our therapist was a little kookoo :)
Submitted by JessicaGiovanna on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:37am.
I'm glad someone understands me, Mani6. Are you married too? 5 years here. It went dowhill on the wedding night and hasnt stopped since.
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Ouch. My husband just told me that he is only staying with me for the kids. He doesn't love me but he does 'care.' !0 years. Jesus christ I'm dense. I now realize he's been trying to tell me for one or two years.
I'm glad someone understands me, Mani6. Are you married too? 5 years here. It went dowhill on the wedding night and hasnt stopped since.
Submitted by Girl about town on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 7:17pm.
this stupid bitch dragged her ex hubby through the mud when she was telling anyone with an ear that she was not happy in the marriage and the sex was bad blah blah blah
who does that?
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Who does that? Pretty much every divorced woman I know! Even my mom talked about my dad's weak dick game when they divorced (I didn't ask, by the way). That's pretty standard but most people don't have a journalist and a mic in their face.
Submitted by JessicaGiovanna on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 11:20pm.
Love isn't real, the end.
It's about as real as joy, happiness and the feeling of not being alone.
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She was a dick about her former marriage. Srsly, now everyone knows that her ex-husband bored her cooch to death. Not cool. And, when they married, HE was the big deal - rich Italian nobility - and she was just a cute teen. Once she made a name for herself, she was off to fry bigger fish.
Why don't these two just date a few years before even thinking about engagement? They realise that people who already have one divorce under their belt are even more likely to divorce again, right? They think it's so roooomantic to have a frothy, expensive wedding with someone they're in a new flush of romantic love with... who cares what happens afterwards?
Love isn't real, the end.
She's pretty but not as much as she thinks she is. She'll unload him when someone more famous pays attention to her for five minutes.
Also, cheesy stage name. CockBURN
(no relation to Jennifer Lopez, she wishes)
Submitted by Haribo on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 9:13pm.
I want some news about Depp..
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I hear Amber may or may not have worn him right out. No idea where he is these days, the Swifter's bfs seem to hog all the spotlight, hahaha
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I just can't with some bitch who thinks its cute to say that all kids should go to boarding school at 7.
I want some news about Depp...haven't heard about Johnny in a while. What is the sexiest man up to I'm wondering.
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
That's terrific!
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Good for them. Does this mean we'll stop hearing about her?
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A Lannister always pays his debts.
He looks like her dad in that pic.
She's beautiful and he's the opposite of that. Not only is he ugly, but he has such a blah, boring face. Maybe when you're that good-looking it helps to oversee someone's obvious flaws.
Congrats to her on her fierce eyebrow game.
this stupid bitch dragged her ex hubby through the mud when she was telling anyone with an ear that she was not happy in the marriage and the sex was bad blah blah blah
who does that? She sounds like a selfish bitch who is impossible to keep happy, good luck to this guy hope he likes to beat his head against several walls.
Ok she is cute, so are many women out there, hell so am I. So what?
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Don't start none and the'll be none.
LOL, what the hell is Jason doing in that pic?
Olivia Wilde has a gorgeous face.
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"Bye, Whore" -MK
Not a clue who either one is. Should I know them?
Oliva Wilde is one very goodlooking woman.
I spend a copious amount of time analyzing her wide-jawed face at the expense of the movie. It is a fascinating face. I enjoy seeing it on my screen.
Too bad about the short fleshy legs and wide hips though, but they cover up well :)
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~~~ Woosah ~~~~
I think she has real pretty eyes. She's pretty inspite of her jaw.
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I like to smile, smiling's my favorite! : )
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 5:51pm.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 5:47pm.
*drowning sorrows over Seahawks*
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I know. Heartbreak City *hic*
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Sure this isn't a scene from a new Judd Apatow movie (ya know, his usual scenario - gorgeous girl falls for very-average looking guy)?
I liked him up until Hall Pass. And she's an idiot.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 5:47pm.
*drowning sorrows over Seahawks*
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 4:00pm.
Experts recommend rushing into your next serious relationship ASAP after the last one ends.
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Haha..or in the case of Hollywood before the previous one ends.
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He has become much more manicured-looking in the past couple of years. Nothing wrong with change, just an observation! Congrats to them. She is very, very lovely.
All I want to know is will Uncle NORM!! be at the wedding? Jason really resembles a slim down Norm here..
"It is better to have loved and lost dick than to have never had dick at all."
==Dick Solomon
Third Rock From the Sun
Congratulations to them! Gorge and funny is a great combination. Now maybe she'll amend her seven-year limit and Olivia universe comments to something more hopeful.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I guess Jason's all right with a seven-year marriage, since Olivia Jane Cockburn says that's the time limit for her.
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"Lord help us all! Jesus take the bedazzled wheel." ~~MK
It makes me happy to see her all decked out in Kansas gear at KU games.
She has a man jaw
sucky, warning: imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
That is a hilarious picture.
We ♥ Jason Suckdikis!
(Are there nudes of Jason presenting hole?)
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
What is the rush to get married among these celebs? I don't get it. I mean, I'm married but that's partly for practical reasons. Reasons rich folk don't have.
She's an overtalker (makes her sound like an idiot), though him I like. Well, liked. I lose a little shine when someone is dating a pretty dummy.
And dayum, girl -- second marriage by age 28? Unless you're hoping to pop out a bebe asap, that's a wee fast.
I think she is so pretty. Congrats to them. I think he is cute but he comes off as a skeeze to me for some reason.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
She needs eyeliner moderation boot camp.
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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK
I like him, I think he's cute and funny. Not in that photo, though. She bothers me. I just think she's very overrated.
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Douchechill!
Meh. I give him a couple of years before he's slippin' the Snausage to some other hO.
Experts recommend rushing into your next serious relationship ASAP after the last one ends.
Oh Olivia, I thought we had promised to stay single for each other until we found a way to cross paths! :(
Congratulations, Aliki!
And January Jones' scowl is extra big today, lol!