ICYMI: Tina Fey & Amy Poehler Putting A Burn On James Cameron
We're halfway through the Golden Globes and if you're playing the Amy & Tina drinking game, then you're probably doing a steady 55mph on the booze highway while making you're way to Drinkville. And you're probably shaped like a giant meatball sub, because you swallowed one giant meatball sub whole after hearing someone thank Harvey Weinstein. Make room for another, because I'm sure somebody else is going to thank his ass. If you're playing your own drinking game, then there's probably fifteen empty bottles of Strawberry Hill and a comatose hooker on the floor, because I know how you are. You drunk!
Here's Amy and Tina busting out poses on the red carpet earlier tonight and I'm sure they totally planned to look like a lesbian couple going to a daytime wedding in a backyard garden in 1956. And if you missed Amy and Tina's opening monologue, it's below these block of words. Wait, there's two of them saying words, so I can't call it a monologue. Do I call it a DOSologue? Yeah, I guess so. Anyway, if you missed their opening DOSologue, it's below these block of words:
And they should each get a Golden Globe for yanking James Franco's taint and James Cameron's droopy taint in the same monologue....I mean DOSologue.
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Why all the hate for Girls?? Girls is the anti-Sex and the City, it is real not rich fashion victims flaunting their fabulousness, I LOVE the fact that the lead character is no sex symbol but still gets a lot of sex, the other chicks are quirky and nutty, I love the crack spirit guide episode when the funny virgin thought she smoked a clear glass cigarette amd ended up running down a street and somehow lost her skirt, and COULD not stop talking to herself....that shit was classic....after she found out she accidentally smoked crack the first thing she says is please don't tell my mother!! That is as close to real as it gets! You slutz are too jaded here, it is a fucking comedy for Gods sake!!!
Never been a big Tina Fey fan but she had 2 LOL moments for me. 1) The crack at T. Swift about Michael J. Fox's son and 2) the middle school comment to that Girls girl. Don't know that girl but her whining bugged me.
tina fey has NEVER been funny to me. i also hate her butchiness
These two are just a natural pair, the chemistry between them is amazing. I found myself with a big grin on my face the entire monologue.
I don't think Amy gets near the attention she should for being funny, she is one stone cold funny slut.
The should indeed host everything!
P.S..I know you're reading this Tina so...you know..call me:D
These ladies killed it. They made a great team and took no prisoners.
Right on Sucky!
*chanting as always*
Shut the fuck up kid, you're in my closet now.
honey these two truck driving lesbianas are really funny and make me lol
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
didn't watch one ounce of the gg, but i'm all about girl power, so kadooze to tina and amy for hosting this thing...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Wow, that is one ugly dress on Tina. For an event like this you should go either short or long -- not something in the middle. Blech.
I liked her until I read Bossypants. She comes off as full of herself.
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"Brows should not look like a condiment!" -MK
Tina and Amy did a fantastic job hosting!
I adore them both!(especially Tina)
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Shout out Tina Fey! I know from bossypants that you read shit here as well as another source where you said so.
I just want you to know that I have adored you from the start! I totally would have recognized your ass on the cruise ship and would have totally made you super uncomfortable in a stalker type way because I think you're amazing.
That all being said I just want to say that I will miss 30 Rock but look forward to your future endeavors.(am excited for Admission)
I really want you to do another TV show though so I can watch you be funny on a weekly basis.(by the way...WOMEN are funnier then Men!)
I just want you to know that even though I'm a gay guy and you're a "LIZbean" that I adore you!
Submitted by Cat Scratch on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 3:22am.
Best hosts in YEARS. So tired of men hosting awards shows, it's the same tired old bit where they flirt with hot actresses. These two were interesting, edgy, everything...like, really you wanted to see so much more of them.
But James Cameron had it coming.
People were so dumb about Avatar "IT LOOKS AMAZING!"...but was there a story? Was it well-written? No. So who gives a fuck?
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I thought that joke was funny as fuck because I'd bet someone like James Cameron is insufferable to live with but Avatar(while simplistic on story) is the highest grossing film ever and revolutionized the film industry.(furthermore James Cameron wrote the original draft of Avatar before he did Titanic and held onto it for technology advances and didn't make the film until the right time which I think is commendable.)
It's not like James Cameron is like Michael Bay!
I'm totally going to see Avatar 2 and 3 when they come out in 3-D in theaters.
Best hosts in YEARS. So tired of men hosting awards shows, it's the same tired old bit where they flirt with hot actresses. These two were interesting, edgy, everything...like, really you wanted to see so much more of them.
But James Cameron had it coming.
People were so dumb about Avatar "IT LOOKS AMAZING!"...but was there a story? Was it well-written? No. So who gives a fuck?
WildBee,
you remind me of a bitchfriend , I once had, who was as boring as fuck and dumb as shit. She found nothing funny. I'm not saying you're boring as fuck or dumb as shit, but you just reminded me of that friend. Thanks.
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Submitted by WildBee on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 2:18am.
I've never found Tina Fey or Amy Poehler particularly funny or talented and often wondered how many dicks they had to suck to get where they are. It would probably make a porn star blush.
Lena Dunham and Melissa McCartney are two good examples of heavy women who stylist's cannot dress well without draping them in an excess amount of fabric. Her make-up was awful.
Tina and Amy did a fantastic job hosting!
I adore them both!(especially Tina)
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Shout out Tina Fey!(I know from bossypants that you read shit here)
I just want you to know that I have adored you from the start! I totally would have recognized your ass on the cruise ship and would have totally made you super uncomfortable in a stalker type way because I think you're amazing.
That all being said I just want to say that I will miss 30 Rock but look forward to your future endeavors.(am excited for Admission)
I've never found Tina Fey or Amy Poehler particularly funny or talented and often wondered how many dicks they had to suck to get where they are. It would probably make a porn star blush.
lmao at this -- yep, she's just a regular girl:
http://gawker.com/5966563/here-is-lena-dunhams-37-million-book-proposal
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Tatiana on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:27am.
Lena Dunham is a heinous pig. In case anyone needs another reason to loathe her, she once made a " joke" on Twitter about how she and her friends should go out on Halloween dressed as Canadian serial killers Paul Bernardo and Karla Homolka, and Karla's little sister, whom Paul and Karla murdered. She seriously thought this was hilarious.
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She's a piece of shit.
Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:47am.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:33am.
no. she doesn't scream at waiters. she'd rather just steal their tips then laugh with her friends about it.
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Really? Was that from the show? I thought it was supposed to highlight that the character IS a spoiled, self-centered little bitch, and she's told so frequently on the show.
the character represents her view of herself. she writes it. so using your logic i guess that means she agrees with us that she is a "spoiled, self-centered little bitch" and should be told so frequently
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:31am.
Submitted by babybunny on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 11:51pm.
I think Howard Stern recently complained about her being "a little fat girl" and how it's so gross that a plain fat girl could be successful and famous,
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Howard Stern is mean, mean, mean. I hate him. Once he was playing an audiotape of a porn star who was suicidal. He and his goons played it over and over again and laughed at her, and they even said she should quit talking about it and just do it.
Hateful. Sick. Exploiting the weak for monetary gain. Howard Stern.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:33am.
no. she doesn't scream at waiters. she'd rather just steal their tips then laugh with her friends about it.
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Really? Was that from the show? I thought it was supposed to highlight that the character IS a spoiled, self-centered little bitch, and she's told so frequently on the show.
*shrugs* For me it's not that important for a female character be completely sweet or likable. I thought with "Sex and the City" they were really overloading the cuteness factor on Carrie. It was a great show but you could see SJP's desperate need to be loveable and adorable all the time written all over it.
Tina & Amy were pretty good but I don't get all the over-the-top adulation for them.
Daniel Day Lewis gave his usual incredibly classy and eloquent acceptance speech. Couldn't admire this guy as an actor or a man more. LOVE HIM.
Tina Fey looked stunning, wow I never realized how pretty she is.
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Don't start none and the'll be none.
Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:31am.
Submitted by babybunny on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 11:51pm.
no. she doesn't scream at waiters. she'd rather just steal their tips then laugh with her friends about it.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by babybunny on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 11:51pm.
Sorry I adored Girls,from them jump, it was my life when I was in my 20's looking for love, trying to survive in a new city, what is not to love about Girls???
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Yayy! I also love "Girls" because it brings me funny memories of my dumbass 20-something self and the girlfriends I had then. I can understand if it's not your cup of tea, but I don't get the rage and vitriol that people hurl at Lena Dunham. I haven't heard of her abusing kittens or screaming at waiters or anything. Yeah, she comes from a connected family, but so have many people in Hollywood. I think part of it is rage and envy that a young, unknown, homely and sometimes kinda ugly gal can become a media darling, and (gasp) dare present herself as a sexual, nekkid person on TV, whereas many people might say, "I don't wanna see that shit!" (i.e., I don't wanna see a chubby, plain girl naked, only hot skinny women please.) I think Howard Stern recently complained about her being "a little fat girl" and how it's so gross that a plain fat girl could be successful and famous, I guess. And Lena just shrugged it off and made some joke about putting "little fat girl" on her gravestone or something. I'm sure it's shitty for any girl to hear but she took it in stride. Anyway, on my end I say go on Lena with your smart, frumpy self.
Submitted by Naughychimp on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:17am.
Am I the only one sick of Poehler and Fey? I guess so.
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I still don't get why everyone goes Apeshit over Tina Fey like she's the funniest comedienne to ever grace the planet. I'm guessing because she is someone famous who gives Dlisted a shoutout, I really don't know. I honestly don't find her all that funny, and I didn't find her funny on SNL when she was on it. Amy Poehler is in the same vein for me, except I think she has a little more edge, comedywise than Tina, but I did find their opening act amusing, like I said, for once.
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
Lena Dunham is a heinous pig. In case anyone needs another reason to loathe her, she once made a " joke" on Twitter about how she and her friends should go out on Halloween dressed as Canadian serial killers Paul Bernardo and Karla Homolka, and Karla's little sister, whom Paul and Karla murdered. She seriously thought this was hilarious.
Tina's dress looks like it's covered with squashed spiders.
I posted earlier that Lena the linebacker wore a dress designed by her good friend Zac Posen.. He either isn't such a "good friend" or there's not much to work with there. Takr your pick. :-)
Am I the only one sick of Poehler and Fey? I guess so.
Girls is a show for people who are boring and are way too fascinated by themselves, and people who watch can be like "yes I am totally fascinating as well! This show is about me!" Just swirling around in an endless vortex of insipid-ness (maybe not an actual word). It is super gross and I'm not into it.
Why would David Mamet not get his daughter's teefs fixed?
Michael J. Fox's son looks like a nerdgeek.
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
Everybody sing, "Mamas, don't let your babies get hooked by ol' Swifty."
Submitted by carefreea
Girls/Lena Dunham give me such rage. Whoever her stylist is needs shooting as does her awful tattooist. Not a one of them is well done. Also, her show is shit.
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THIS!!!^^^^^^^^ I do NOT get the hype around that show. The writer girl is writing a memoir on her life; gag me.
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"Somewhere, Jennifer Love Hewitt is vagazzling the words "FUCK MY LIFE" onto her crotch while deep throating a Pillsbury cookie dough roll".--MK
No shit..she's David Mamet's daughter. Like that linebacker-esque bitch ever had to earn anything before. Thinking that it would ever be acceptable to write that scene as something funny shows what an entitled, spoiled little cunt she is. That, and that show is not even close to being funny.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
What was Pimp Mama Kris going to say? That Daniel Craig worked to get the career he has while the Kardashians' fame was handed to them on a glove that didn't fit?--MK
Zosia Mamet is David's daughter, not Lena. The two look nothing alike.
Submitted by crazyinjapan on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:36am.
I totally missed the Swifty dis. Anybody care to give me a quick summary of what it was? :)
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Tina told taylor to stay away from M.J.Fox's son (who looks like a 15 year old McFly), but that Taylor probably wouldn't do that anyway because she needs some "me" time.
Submitted by crazyinjapan on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:36am.
I totally missed the Swifty dis. Anybody care to give me a quick summary of what it was? :)
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She told Taylor Swift to stay away from Michael J. Fox's son.
Submitted by crazyinjapan on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:36am.
I totally missed the Swifty dis. Anybody care to give me a quick summary of what it was? :)
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Tina Fey told her to stay away from Michael J. Fox's son...(who was Mr. Golden Globes tonight)
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"low self esteem is a bitch"...
I agree with you idiots drive me loco, it boils my blood to hear these grown adults who were raised by nannies and such talking about having to struggle in the real world, they really are clueless. The likes of that linebacker Lena & Lady Caca are all the damn same mentality.
I'm betting that a lot of people are going to regret the stupid tattoo fad.
Amy's shoes made my evening alone but she was definitely the funnier of the two.
Girls/Lena Dunham give me such rage. Whoever her stylist is needs shooting as does her awful tattooist. Not a one of them is well done. Also, her show is shit.
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"In other news, the University of Color Me Surprised released a report today which states that water is indeed wet. Mind. Boggled" - Michael K, who else?
I totally missed the Swifty dis. Anybody care to give me a quick summary of what it was? :)
Hilarious!! Love them both!!
Submitted by idiots drive me loco on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:30am.
Warning...anti Lena Dunham rant ahead...
I loathe when privildged trust fund babies attempt to pretend they understand what its like to struggle. That linebacker bitch wrote in stealing tips since her parents cut her off.
just the idea that stealing tips is ok or funny should be enough to keep anyone from admiring this over indulged hideous [inner and outer] woman.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Tina Fey ripping Taylor Swift a new ass for "Hot Slut Of The Day", please!!
I loved Jodie Foster's speech. "I don't have to come out, I don't have to go in, I'm not telling you bitches anything because it's none of your damn business, and chew on that".
Someone tell Lena Dunham, its okay to wear flats!!!
she held up the show!!
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"low self esteem is a bitch"...
Damn, Amy looks great. The girls mostly killed it.
"None of us PLANS to do porn, Tina .. " - best line ever
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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK
Warning...anti Lena Dunham rant ahead...
I loathe when privildged trust fund babies attempt to pretend they understand what its like to struggle. That linebacker bitch wrote in stealing tips since her parents cut her off. What an entitled whore.☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
What was Pimp Mama Kris going to say? That Daniel Craig worked to get the career he has while the Kardashians' fame was handed to them on a glove that didn't fit?--MK