Golden Globes Open Post: Hosted By The Japanese Cojo
I am still seven kinds of sick, so there I won't be drunk blogging the Golden Globes (yes, I thought of Christina Hendricks while typing that and yes, I liked it) tonight. Although, I could down three jugs of NyQuil and just type "pleasefuckingtakemelordendmyaches" over and over again during my liveblog. That would be way more interesting that my past live blogs. Anyway, the Golden Globes are here and I was trying to find a picture of Cojo for this open post, but I couldn't find one. I don't even think Cojo is there. How can the Golden Globes happen without Cojo?!
In his place is Japanese musician type Yoshiki Hayashi who wrote the Golden Globes theme song, or something like that. I know, he's no Cojo, but if you put your nose to your screen, you will smell the faint scent of honey-infused unicorn farts just like Cojo! So his ass will do.
Happy Golden Globe-ing, everyone! Have a few dozen drinks for me. If Anne Hathaway doesn't win, I'll see you in the safe house since she'll make all of us pay if she doesn't have her hands around that golden dome butt plug trophy tonight.
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Anne No Panties Hackaway still might have to give more head for an Oscar...nothing is guarenteed.
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Submitted by sugar free on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:46pm.
WTF is blerg??? Sorry, but i thought her speech to Sally Field was patronizing.
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me too
Hey Quint tmi LOL hes so weird and grateful
LOVE
EWEN McG :)
~O..+~
"Have you met Howard?"
Lithium alert! QT needs some.
Quentin is the second drunky of the night, after Adele's drunk azz.
So glad the resst of the free world will realize tonight what we Dlisters have been screaming about for years; Swifty is a phony. Her ungracious, barely concealed rage at losing to Adele will be a turning point when it is mentioned in tomorrow's blogs/ entertainment shows.
Surprised to see that she has a kindred sour-pussed spirit in Tommy Lee Jones of all people. Dude, it's a foreign press bowling trophy, for fuck's sake. I was more honored getting gold stars forty years ago in public school for perfect attendance.
Hey Quentin! ~ SHOW US HOW DRUNK YOU ARE!!!
Awful dress on this actress. I don't know her name but her eyes are on the side of her head.
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Dark-sided!
Tarantino's bref smell like toes ! eww!!!!
oh god no
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
LOL QT !!
Congtats Ann.
*voms*
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Dark-sided!
WTF is blerg??? Sorry, but i thought her speech to Sally Field was patronizing.
Did anyone notice that in AnnEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE's acceptance speech, she kept trying to make the audience laugh but no one did? bhaahahahaha!
and how she wouldn't shut up so the music started playing?
I can't believe she won, now she's going to be more unbearable until she gets that oscar
Sans Fards and Twatty-- I just don't get her. I hated Bridesmaids with the white hot intensity of a thousand burning suns. I expected something so different, and all I saw was her fucking pity party and being a whiny cunt.
Ann is going to be insufferable from here on in. And I'm not talking about this year-- FOREVER. gaaahh.
Lord let the Oscar campaign keep churning out choice quotes at least.
Hathaway won? Argh!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Hockey fan on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:37pm.
Tommy Lee Jones prolly just swigged his drink and left. He's a honey badger.
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lolol
If this had been Anne Hathaway of a few years ago, winning the Oscar for Brokeback Mountain or Devil Wears Prada or one of her other movies, I would not have given a shit (okay, she doesn't give award-winning performances in those movies, but just using those to make a point). But she's been such a hoity-toity arrogant beyotch lately that everyone just wants her to lose, me included. Even though she did a good job in Les Miz, I'll admit it.
I'm still calling Sally Field for the best supporting actress Oscar.
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A Lannister always pays his debts.
Submitted by stefystef on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:40pm.
Submitted by cocoebert on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:30pm.
Jennifer Lawrence was great in the movie, but I felt like she was too young to carry the role.
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Funny you should say that because Jennifer got the role over Angelina. So it would make sense that an older woman play the role, but Jennifer did a really good job.
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She did a god job but she didn't get the role of Angelina, that's PR. Angelina was one of many actresses who were interested in the project initially but director/producer already had someone in mind. That's not getting a role over anyone.
Ann with an E must read the D.. She quoted the comments.. Emu rat walker..
Barffff..
Cadillac has the best commercials
~O..+~
"Have you met Howard?"
who talks like that??? what a geek, hahaha. Oh AnnEEE Hathaway tries so fucking hard she is insufferable.
I had to mute the TV. I can put up with a lot, but listening to this insufferable twat act like she was SOOO surprised by the win was making me want to vomit.
Oh WHO CARES! Ann trying to act all nice and ass kissy tonight so everyone forgets what a cunt she is.
Also this same diet coke commercial being played during every break is driving me crazy.
Are they going to be playing this Sofia Vergara commercial at every break?
Fuck. My. Life.
Submitted by stefystef on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:40pm.
Submitted by cocoebert on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:30pm.
Jennifer Lawrence was great in the movie, but I felt like she was too young to carry the role.
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Funny you should say that because Jennifer got the role over Angelina. So it would make sense that an older woman play the role, but Jennifer did a really good job.
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Really? Interesting. Angelina's almost too big of a star for that role anyway. But age-wise it would have made more sense. That character was super-jaded in a way people in the early 20s don't tend to be.
Sorry, DP, I was so mad I hit the post comment button too hard.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Two eyes, two eyebrows."
Hey, Hattaway ~ stop trying to out "meee? really meee?" Taylor Swift, it looks like shit on both of you overrated delusional twats
BARF Have-a-seat won. UGH! She said 'Blergh'. Don't ruin that word for me, you hag.
I hate her, but I do like her dress.
Also is that her singing? Because it sounds off-key to me, but I'm no music expert.
Bitch 'Wrap it up' doesn't mean talk for two more minutes.
I have an early start tomorrow so I'm off to bed. Good night everyone.
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It hurts because you let your black heart beat for an asshole who can't even send you a "P.S. I'm about to fuck a hole that doesn't belong to you" text before fucking said hole that doesn't belong to you.
bring up the music!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Her mouth and teeth are so large.
OH, FUCK, ME!!! That ugly twat won. Just listening to a few seconds of that song made me want to vomit. I was hoping this would be a practice run for her not winning the Oscar. Shut yer fricking trap you goofy-looking cunt.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Two eyes, two eyebrows."
OH, FUCK, ME!!! That ugly twat won. Just listening to a few seconds of that song made me want to vomit. I was hoping this would be a practice run for her not winning the Oscar. Shut yer fricking trap you goofy-looking cunt.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Two eyes, two eyebrows."
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:35pm.
Hockey fan -- I hear ya on Kristen Wiig. I've been hating on her since I heard that she shacked up with Jon Hamm. Even though his gf is ugly, did he have to have a sidepiece who is ugly, too? What is wrong with my man???
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I find Kristen Wiig to be hit or miss. She was dead on as Pimp Mama Kris in that SNL skit spoofing Kim Kartrashian's divorce, but the Gilly character is SO. ANNOYING. *grits teeth* I finally saw Bridesmaids last week and really did not get the hype.
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A Lannister always pays his debts.
``quite trying so hard Hatth
~O..+~
"Have you met Howard?"
Ok the shout-out to Sally Field was sweet.
Oh stop it Ann.
Blurgh indeed. Go away.
Submitted by cocoebert on Sun, 01/13/2013 - 10:30pm.
Jennifer Lawrence was great in the movie, but I felt like she was too young to carry the role.
*************************************************************
Funny you should say that because Jennifer got the role over Angelina. So it would make sense that an older woman play the role, but Jennifer did a really good job.
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"That shit was more staged and choreographed than Paul Ryan's soup kitchen visit."- MK, 10/16/12
BLERG?!!
Oh my dear God.
Done, over, we are finished professionally.
fuck - Hathaway just won her GG - now let's watch her try her hardest to be funny and charmingly witty. Barf.
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Did anyone order me a plain cheese?
She is so fake this bish.
Whatever, Ann, e purposely left off.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU... *breaths* -UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK, NOOOOOOO!!
Ugh, this annoying bitch.
How are you going to fight for some dick if you don't even know whether or not the dick is good? The dick might not even be worth getting into a Rock-Paper-Scissors fight over, let alone a fist fight. - MK
Aw, fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. AnnE Crappedherpants won.
@ Bigbendy -- aaaaand now we know who's been going out to those extra meals with Jack Black, lol
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gd it. frack.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
ugh
Mandy Patinkin, don't worry daddy, come here, rest your head in my chest... there, there, everything is going to be fine, shhhh, shhhh.... *slowly moving right hand to cup a feel of little Patinkin*