Rosie O’Donnell announced on Instagram today that she and her trophy wife Michelle Rounds are moms to their first cutie patootie (never 4get The Rosie O’Donnell Show 1996-2002) together. Rosie posted this picture of their baby friend along with this note written in text talk:
“we r thrilled to announce the arrival of r daughter Dakota – #withloveandthanks – AMEN”
Rosie didn’t say anything else. Did they used a surrogate? I don’t know. Did they adopt Baby Dakota? I don’t know. Was Michelle Rounds knocked up with Baby Dakota? I don’t know. Was Rosie O knocked up with Baby Dakota (note: I’d be pissed if Rosie O was pregnant and didn’t let us know, because that means we missed out on pictures of her knocked up body in CROCs and a wet swimming t-shirt)? Probably not. Did they secretly grow Baby Dakota O’Donnell in the nest on Donald Trump’s head without him knowing? Probably so. The only thing we do know is that Rosie is a mother for the fifth time and she and her wife gave their daughter an Irish stripper’s name.
And did you know Rosie’s oldest kid, Parker, is 17? We’re all old! Reading that Parker is 17 made a grey hair grow out of my ear.