The Hell Is Kim Kartrashian Wearing, Part 1,674,923

This is your up-to-the-second update (that you didn't want or ask for) of Kim Kardashian's ever-growing knocked up body. Although, some konspiracy theorists think Kim is Beyonce-ing it and will cover her body with the best baby pillows that Kanye West's money can buy while a surrogate (SPOILER ALERT: Bruce Jenner, the surrogate is Bruce Jenner) carries the Illuminati's golden child. Whatever the case may be, the smog above France has been infested with the stank scent of fishy dick queefs and bronzer and it's all because Kim and Kanye are in Paris right now for some reason.

Don't ask me why they're there, but Kanye is of course using their daily walks down the ho stroll to display some fugged up shit on Kim's body. I don't even know how to explain that thing. Is it a cape barfing up a jacket? Is it a re-worked Snuggie? Is it a Land's End fleece jacket? Is it a fupa-hiding poncho? The only thing I do know is that it's a wreck and Kanye would've looked better in it. Kanye would've worked that cape thing and put the gay in gay Paree by giving everyone a twirlie show.

Splash, Wenn.com, Bauer Griffin

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by amarx on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:45pm.

Kim and Kanye are still auctioning off the baby naming rights to the highest bidder: http://hollywoodandswine.com/kim-kardashian-and-kanye-west-to-sell-namin...

Andy Marx

Submitted by Dog on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:42pm.

I really detest those boots.

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Submitted by modelspiceboi on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:42pm.

Does this bitch think she is Storm or something?

Submitted by Sarah Smile on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:40pm.

Ugh - I hate that look where somebody is all bundled-up with an open-toed shoe.

Sarah Smile

Submitted by VaniDadez on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 8:10pm.

Amen!

Submitted by bambam on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:40pm.

@ Mike,

Did ya see the shoes Gosling wore with that suit? They showed them on TMZ. Fuuuuugly.

As for Kim K, where's her sword and mask and flamenco hat? Bitch looks like Zorro.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1zJeGf-gpc

Submitted by mike on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:34pm.

Something that disproves once and for all the old adage that black is slimming.

Submitted by BaconSlut on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:32pm.

Danka, Poppy! It put a big smile on my face (not my crotch) this morning! ;)

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Submitted by QuweenJillian on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:31pm.

I honestly wish that everyone would completely ignore these assholes. TMZ is the worst with their nonstop "stories" about them. I wonder what they would do if everyone stopped talking about them, or stopped taking their pic...

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I'm not a slut, I'm sexually liberated. There's a difference.
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Submitted by Gardening Girl on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:31pm.

Yes, that helps. I totally cant see that your ass is expanding at the speed of light.

"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012

Submitted by princesspoppy on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:31pm.

Maybe if there are never any comments on trashians posts he'll stop?

Submitted by princesspoppy on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:30pm.

congrats baconslut on your win. :)

Submitted by chlyn on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:30pm.

She'd better not have a 15-month pregnancy like Jessica Simpson. Come to think of it, we *are* coming in at the very beginning of this story; 12 weeks, right? Ugh!

Princesspoppy has the right solution: stop giving her the attention.

Submitted by BaconSlut on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:27pm.

@MK

*sits with Poppy and others who are WELL past saturation point*

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Submitted by princesspoppy on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:25pm.

Michael K for the love of god please stop posting about this cunt.

Submitted by TOPANGA on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:25pm.

B*tch is 12 weeks and wearing a tent like she's 9 months. This chick is going to milk this pregnancy for all its worth. Either that or she's trying to hide her sagging @ss since she can't get butt injections for the next 6 months.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"

-Mean Girl,Regina George

Submitted by AgentBrittany on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 7:24pm.

I'm really not okay with the fact that Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are in Paris right now. There is just no reason to skank up the City of Love.