Hot Slut Of The Day!

Datta Phuge, a rich ass 32-year-old money lender from the Indian city of Pimpri-Chinchwad who dazzles all the single ladies with his $22,000 custom-made sold gold shirt. Finally, India has its very own Mr. T.

You’re probably reading this while completely pantless, because just staring at Datta’s glorious Rezastache made your panties drop and that gurgling feeling in your pelvic area is your ovaries ovulating at record speed from looking at his sharp-as-fuck gold shirt. That’s exactly the reaction Datta wanted. Datta paid 15 of Rumpelstiltskin’s apprentices to weave him a short-sleeve, button down, pussy-summoning shirt. The shirt was made using gold thread, white velvet and Swarovski crystals. Rome might’ve been built in a day, but the epitome of luxury was built in 224 hours.

According to the esteemed literary journal The Daily Mail, Datta is looking for a wife and he believes that his Cooch4Gold shirt is going to get him one. Datta also put the pimp in Pimpri-Chinchwad by using some of the leftover gold to make matching cuffs and rings. Datta explained his priceless dream shirt like this to the Prune Mirror:

“I know I am not the best looking man in the world but surely no woman could fail to be dazzled by this shirt? The gold shirt has been one of my dreams. It will be an embellishment to my reputation as the ‘Gold man of Pimpri”‘

I’m dazzled, aren’t you? And a solid gold dick cozy would really complete this look.

I hope Datta hired a team of security guards, because that shirt is a gold digger magnet if I ever saw one. Somewhere high above Turkey, Heather Mills is flying through the clouds and her body is pulling her towards India. One of the cons of wearing a luxurious shirt of gold is that Datta will have to pry a gold digger off of it every now and again.

(For Marissa, John, Rohya and Megan)