Lindsay Lohan Wants You To Think That She's Laughing WITH You
Here's the trailer for the movie where Lindsay Lohan refused to put her mouth on Charlie Sheen's mouth, because if their saliva mixed together, a super-resistant monster STD strain would be born and bitch is already in enough trouble with the CDC. In LiLo's last movie, she pretty much made fun of Elizabeth Taylor by playing her and in Scary Movie 5 she makes fun of herself. While parodying Paranormal Activity, LiLo and Charlie try to make a sex tape, but can't, because her sobriety monitor, tracking anklet and dog shock collar are in the way. TMZ says that (SPOILER ALERT if you care) LiLo ends up running Charlie Sheen over with her car and blames it on somebody else. Only LiLo can collect a check for making fun of how she constantly butt fucks the California Justice System without lube.
And it was a nice touch putting a half-melted, bronzer-covered Scream mask over LiLo's face for all her scenes.
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It prob was n/a. Lindsay puts her booze in water bottles so she can cry "sober!"
"This world is a whore."
"Lindsay was pictured at a family dinner on Saturday with a glass with a salted rim in front of her, but sources told TMZ the drink was a non-alcoholic strawberry margarita that her grandmother was sipping on." (DM)
I'm so sure her grandmother drinks non-alcoholic anything. hahaha
Ashley Tisdale is one pug-fugly bitch...she already had a nose job and it is still a huge honking schnoz.
I still totally would with Simone Rex, and that Leo lookalike is way cuter than the actual Leo
Which one of you whores is responsible for my fave comment re: LieBlow?
"My favorite picture of Lindsay. It's her 3am been ho'in all night JUST jumped outta a car dude tried to KILL ME now I don't know where I am my buzz is gone I need another fiddy for an 8 ball you wanna date? you a cop? you ain't a crazy fucker are you? where am I? look."
Liz and Dick was scary enough.
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Abbynormal activity at best.
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wtf was that?
i rather watch 24 hrs of hoity toity masterpiece theatre w/ a corn cob shoved up my starfish.
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♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
This is the antethesis of funny.
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Submitted by Darknight on Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:27pm.
THE TRUTH. Making the world a better place.
i remember the very first scary movie. the first half of the movie was a lot of fun, the other half was weaker. luckily there was a good twist at the end.
then i've seen scary movie 2 which was a try-hard piece of shit.
i haven't seen no.3, didn't know there was no.4... and now there's no.5? and there's not a single good joke in that trailer. it looks like a total crap
Submitted by PrettyHateMachine on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 9:37pm.
I'd rather sit through a double feature of Crossroads and Glitter than watch any movie Lindsay has been part of lately
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lol
I am amazed by the plastic surgeons who make women look like Jigsaw and think they have improved their looks. Do they ( or their patients) genuinely think they are making people look better?? What types of mirrors are in their offices? And these women are paying thousands of dollars for the privilege of being virtually unrecognizable?
These movies don't look even half entertaining.
I'd rather sit through a double feature of Crossroads and Glitter than watch any movie Lindsay has been part of lately
Heather Locklear should do public service announcements warning all young women of the danger in putting your entire sense of self in your looks. Scary scary Madonna Muppet Mug.
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"Look at this lamb, I'm going to make condoms out of it so that you can ride me until your pussy says 'baaaaaah.'"
~ASkars as channeled by Michael K
Submitted by oceanlover998 on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 8:18pm.
...poor Heather Locklear...it isn't just the botox that's alarming, it looks like all the drinking has finally caught up with her...
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So sad that the drinking caught up with her. Heather was the girl that many men wanted and had the look that many girls dreamed of: girl-next-door-fresh-scrubbed. Alcohol and cigarettes can undue healthy eating, facials, botox, mini-lifts...ugly is the mouth of a woman who has inhaled for years and ends up with a puss that looks like a bung hole.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 7:53pm.Yeah when he was a MTV star he was more famous for even earlier work.
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Isn't "MTV Star" an oxymoron? Jenny McCarthy made it big but that was for showing her tits and bush in a Playboy spread. And no one cares about her now except friends and family.
Anna Faris today also is unrecognizable from her earlier Scary Movie self. She did some great naive deadpan back then.
I typically do not wish death on anyone, but whorehan & kim whoretrashian both need to die immediately; they're both a complete waste of skin...
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
Simon Rex is one degree of separation from Amanda Bynes. He was on that show with her and Jennie Garth: "What I Like About You".
...poor Heather Locklear...it isn't just the botox that's alarming, it looks like all the drinking has finally caught up with her...
...ironically, she started hitting the bottle hard about the time she was staring down middle age...
...she actually looks and sounds about as bad as poor Lohan here...
...I actually thought Scary Movie 3 had its moments...but then again it had that delightful Anna Faris onboard...
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...'Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason '...
I'm not watching the clip but is Anna Faris in it or has her career taken away from having to do these movies?
Wow, that looks worse than the last 2 SM's .. Scary movie & scary movie 2 were the only good ones. After that they seemed try hard n were just plain whack. I will not ne seein this shitfest.
Heather Locklear looks like she is ill because her face is so plumped up in the cheeks, and yet you can tell she isn't ill. She's just overdone the botox or something. SHE is scary, so I guess it is appropriate she is in a Scary Movie. Lindsay looks almost unrecognizable, too.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
I'll wait for it to come out on PPV, 1) to not deal with the fucktards that decide to have an important conversation DURING A MOVIE and 2) I have the option of imbibing to possibly think it's funny.
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SOMEONE SAID COCK, can we say COCK? I didn't know we could say COCK, and still be classy! AHAHAHAHAHAH - WithinReason
Anything Could Happen
<"Submitted by Sayonara on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 6:40pm.
I believe that Simon Rex used to be a host on MTV many moons ago."
Yeah when he was a MTV star he was more famous for even earlier work.
http://gayporngossip.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Simon-rex007.jpg
Where is Jeremy London nowadays ? Have a major crush on him since I saw him in Jason And the Argonauts. Love me those London twins Jeremy & less hotter bro Jason. Jeremy is the trouble maker of the two. Yes heather looks ruffffff !!!! Ewww!
"If it were socially acceptable I would esconce myself in velvet. " George Costanza
Wow that is a FLOP
Don't start none and the'll be none.
Submitted by salacious on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 6:33pm.
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lol Heya Sal! You tell me, was he? Cuz he sure looks somethin' tasty! mmm mmm haha Good to see ya too! <3
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Holy shit, that is not funny in the slightest. Furthermore, if YOU think it's funny, there is something seriously wrong with you.
Aww man,
Charlie used to be SO HOT. Talking 'Platoon','Wall Street' days.
WTF Charlie? Why?????
DiCaprio lookalike kinda looks like a washed out Eric Dane. Simon has done fap porn. Now, he is the rapper Dirt Nasty!
ok i had to look it up ... the DiCaprio lookalike is Ben Cornish.
For all you youngins....Yes Simon Rex was an MTV Veejay...around the time of Kennedy, when MTV was spiraling into a death knell...pre Jersey Whores. His solo tape is all over the web if you know where to look for it. _______________________________________________
If you ever need someone to drink with, I'll drink with you. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, I'll drink with you. I guess what I'm trying to say is: I love to drink!!!
--Karen Walker
Submitted by M.E. on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 6:36pm.
Wait. Was that really DiCaprio???
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No, but we're supposed to think it is.
What a piece of shit.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
On TMZ the other night they said Simon Rex did a fap porn.
ETA: Okay, I looked it up on Wikipedia and I guess he did 3 fap porn movies when he was 19.
But this part on his Wiki page made me laugh:
In 2011, Rex performed at The Piano Room, a Kings Cross nightclub in Sydney, New South Wales, Australia. Rex was involved in a minor incident at the nightclub, jointly owned by John Ibrahim and investors, including Kyle Sandilands, where a customer allegedly took a microphone from Rex and assaulted him. It was alleged that Rex, in self-defense, punched the man, and was defended by associates of the Bra Boys.
I'm a woman, but if I were a man, I think I would start to question my manhood and life choices if I needed guys who call themselves, "The Bra Boys" to defend me.
I believe that Simon Rex used to be a host on MTV many moons ago.
Jersey Strong
Oh God please make it stop!
Wait. Was that really DiCaprio???
Submitted by WithinReason... on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 6:27pm.
Clearly Charlie and Lindsay are highlights in this film. For serious. lol Honestly, everyone else looks like yesterday's refried leftovers.
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ITA Within (hi!), I don't know what else Simon Rex has worked on besides the Scary Movie series. Wasn't he in gay porn?
Clearly Charlie and Lindsay are highlights in this film. For serious. lol Honestly, everyone else looks like yesterday's refried leftovers.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 5:49pm.
Submitted by mike on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 5:47pm.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 5:43pm.
did Nick Stahl do a cameo?
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It would've been nice to see Jeremy London in it too.
Lucie & Foxxy -- hey, loves!!! <3
Okay, Ashley Tisdale is the star, Katt Williams has a supporting role and Blohan has a bit in this hot mess. Will. Not. See.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
Heather looks horrible. These days she looks like she's made of wax plus steroids mixed with Botox. She's frightening. Looks like Joan Rivers in DRAG
Nah. Don't do it. Don't click play unless you have a hazmat suit
Her. Fucking. Face. She just keeps doing more shit to it instead of getting a doctor to UNdo what she did in the first place.
Thanks Mike. The other movies were too damn silly.
Jersey Strong
Submitted by mike on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 5:47pm.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 5:43pm.
did Nick Stahl do a cameo?
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 5:43pm.
Bwhaha! This movie also stars Katt Williams? The crackhead trifecta is complete!
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All it needs is Amanda Bynes.
What's going on with Heather Locklear's face? Parts of it seem to be lacking mobility.
Bwhaha! This movie also stars Katt Williams? The crackhead trifecta is complete!
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Douchechill!
Submitted by Sayonara on Sat, 12/22/2012 - 5:28pm.
The first Scary Movie was the best one. I will pass on this.
Exactly.