LeAnn Rimes Blames Her Wreck Of A Performance On A 13-Year-Old (UPDATE)

LeAnn Rimes wasn’t drunk and she wasn’t in the middle of a diarrhea attack brought on by a laxative overdose during her awkward duet with Carly Rose Sonenclar on The X-Factor last night. LeAnn is supposedly suffering from the sicks, but that’s not the excuse her lawyer gave to TMZ. LeAnn’s lawyer Larry Stein says that LeAnn wasn’t giving the superstar performance (insert eye roll here) she usually gives, because she was sharing the stage with a little girl who couldn’t really handle the song. Oh, Falcor, I like your jokes!

The X-Factor isn’t Carly Rose’s first time singing in front of a bunch of people. She’s performed in a couple of Broadway shows including Les Miserables and has yodeled out the National Anthem at several sporting events. So it’s not like Carly Rose’s only performance experience was singing in front of her stuffed animals in her bedroom. But LeAnn is still saying that Carly was really nervous and “she was trying to help this 13-year-old girl who was having some trouble with the song.” Larry wants to make it clear that LeAnn wasn’t drunk or on anything at all, “LeAnn was not performing the way she would normally perform, because she was on stage with a young girl.”

Judging by Carly Rose’s side-eyes and death glares, she wasn’t as nervous as she was annoyed that a slurring hyena was trying to sabotage her. LeAnn Rimes thought she was back in her Star Search days when she used to sabotage her competitors by sprinkling shards of glass in their Kool-Aid.

You stick with that excuse, LeAnn. But I would like LeAnn a whole lot more if she kept it truthful by saying, “Of course I was drunk! The only way I can get on TV is if I sing with a damn child on a two-bit talent show. You’d be drunk too!”

UPDATE: LeAnn Rimes went on Twitter and said she never said anything to TMZ and she hopes Carly Rose wins tonight. You don’t remember saying it, because you were drunk, LeAnn! Give me that bottle and go to bed.