Amber Heard Is Just Not That Into Johnny Depp's Peen
Johnny Depp and Amber Heard started getting naked together either right before or right after his relationship with Vanessa Paradis ended, and there are rumors that shit is getting so serious that they are about to move in together. But Radar says that while Johnny is ready to get monogamous with Amber, she's not really feeling it. Even though current day Johnny Depp looks like a beautiful butch lesbian, he doesn't have a 'gina and that's what Amber really wants.
A source tells Radar that Johnny wants to be with Amber all the time, but she keeps telling him that she only wants his dick part-time and she just can't have a full-on relationship with a dude. The source says Amber is breaking Johnny's greasy lil' heart:
“Johnny and Amber have been having a lot of fun spending time with one another, but Amber keeps telling him she’s not interested in being with him in a monogamous relationship. She says she feels she's too young for him, but the main factor is Amber prefers dating women over men and has no interest in committing to a guy -- even if he is Johnny Depp! Amber is a free spirit when it comes to love, and refuses to label herself as gay, or even bi-sexual, but it's a fact that she is more attracted to women than men and the most meaningful relationships she has had to date have been with same sex partners."
What a cruel, Depp-eating she-devil that Amber Heard is. Johnny is already humiliating himself by dressing like an old west english teacher who works in the mornings as a newsboy, and she's humiliating him even more by toying with his innocent heart! Did I ever tell you that you're my hero, Amber Heard?
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ooppppppps
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
@bambam - Prude
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Now take off your shoes...
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by bambam on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 11:15pm.
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What are you wearing BamBam? Can you describe it... slowly? lol ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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hoff -- to me, this is one of the hottest men on the planet, and his voice just kills me, Sam Elliott.
http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=sam+elliot&qpvt=sam+elliot&FORM=IGRE...
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:55pm.
Submitted by Madam Pince on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:52pm.
Submitted by christine the hoff on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:43pm.
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Y'all are disgusting. How can you just sit back and objectify the man like that? Like he's some thick, sweaty, swarthy, maybe a little musky, big veined piece of meat to be used like your sexual property, your bitch. You ladies disgust me, just a bunch of insensitive neanderthal vajajay heads.
I'm leaving and y'all better not be looking at my ass either.
*pulls up saggy pants to show off butt melons, slowwwwwly walks away*
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HTTR
I would have let him hit it in his Master and Commander outfit! And yeah to Joaquin as the psycho Emperor...crazy sex is nice too...just sayin'
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
I agree about SVU being porn during the Stabler years.
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 11:07pm.
He looks so fucking ridiculous anymore. I'd rather bang women than have sex with him.
So would Amber Heard, apparently.
I agree with Within - never believed that this relationship was real. We've only seen pics of them together on the red carpet and this over-explanation for Radar just confirms it.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 11:06pm.
and Chris Cornell......... sigh..........
http://www.google.com/search?q=chris+cornell+pictures&rls=com.microsoft:...
WHORE I WILL FIGHT FOR CHRIS CORNELL!!! Hee! One of my best girlfriends sends me the same b-day wish every year: 'I hope your love Chris Cornell finds you and you have many black haired, green-gray eyed tall, lanky Irish-catholic babies.' some day, Chris, some day.
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It hurts because you let your black heart beat for an asshole who can't even send you a "P.S. I'm about to fuck a hole that doesn't belong to you" text before fucking said hole that doesn't belong to you.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:55pm.
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I hear ya about loving Gladiator, and the chains, but you'd let the Crowe do the dirty birdie down below EVEN with his pudgy love rolls peeking out of his warrior costume? Back then yes, today, no thanks. I'll be over here with JOAQUIN! hehehe
MK, you are right, Depp is looking lezzie Beaver.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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He looks so fucking ridiculous anymore. I'd rather bang women than have sex with him.
ethang, elmo533 & hoff -- I totally agree about Depp; while he seems to be a nice guy, I find nothing about him attractive. He's no Meloni, Jon Hamm or Mark Harmon. For me, "SVU," "Mad Men" and "NCIS" marathons are porn.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
http://www.google.com/search?q=russell+crowe+in+gladiator+pictures&rls=c...
The scene where crowe is chained up by the wrists.
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ERMAHGERD! *faints*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by jalynne on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:56pm.
Deal!
GG and Madame. omg. seriously. My husband never minds me watching that he knew he's gonna get LAID.
The scene where crowe is chained up by the wrists.
Submitted by mike on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 9:39pm.
I'll be in L.A. starting the 26th, Amber. Call me!
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I'll be getting there a day ahead of you. She'll be all yours after I snag one of Nicki Minaj's blonde wigs and jump Johnny.
Ladies, this is one guy's appeal that I never got. He's short, lacks muscle tone and always looks unkempt. What am I not seeing?
RE: Gladiator
I would like RC to do me dirty wearing his gladiator tunic...*eyes roll back*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
I first read this as "old wet english teacher"
Whatever that means
(no relation to Jennifer Lopez, she wishes)
I second everything Christine the H said.
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"I don't know how to argue my existence with someone who has reviewed a gas station." ~~Laurie Notaro
Am I the only person who doesn't see what the big deal about Johnny is. He was hot in his 21 Jump Street Days, but now? With his faux accent and dumb facial hair? Um, no.
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"Somewhere, Jennifer Love Hewitt is vagazzling the words "FUCK MY LIFE" onto her crotch while deep throating a Pillsbury cookie dough roll".--MK
She is hot.
Depp never rang my bell. if I was so hot I could have anyone, I'd go after Russell Crowe....
ever see Gladiator? Jesus, that movie's porn to me.
Submitted by saltydog on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:16pm.
not to mention who ever wants to be with somebody with 4 kids....
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yeah, honest. Nothing against divorced people with kids, you're not doomed, but does it ever complicate the equation and matters. Plus the kids will probably hate you, the other spouse will be involved. What a nightmare.
DUDE! you're Johnny mother fn Depp!
1. bitch see curb
2. find new bitch
"Just look at all the fucks I give!"
"Faith means not wanting to know what is true." — Friedrich Nietzsche
"Is your name Michael Diamond?" "Naw, mine's Clarence..."
blather999 -- OMG, smegma, one of my most hated words, but it is the technical word for dick cheese. LOL!!!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
This does not surprise me.
Jersey Strong
Submitted by mike on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:11pm.
I think she's pretty, but I don't get how people just seem to go nuts for her. She reminds me of Kelly Cukoo or whatever her name is, the girl on Big Bang Theory.
Submitted by saltydog on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:16pm.
not to mention who ever wants to be with somebody with 4 kids...
Fixed it for ya. :)
Submitted by lalamaria on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 9:58pm.
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Hey Lalamaria, how are you? Ooooh, I like the new Mads avie, lol. <3
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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not to mention who ever wants to be with somebody with 4 kids who is like 6 months out of a 15 year relationship...run girl run.
I also think it shows class that she doesn't really seem to be trying to trade on his fame for publicity since they've never really been photographed together except for at events for a movie they're both in.
Well, good for her. :)
she's purty.
the radar story sounds completely made up, it's laughable.
so they're not in it for the long haul. Must they come up with fabricated reasons or speculations?
Submitted by louise_brooks on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 9:55pm.
I just don't see the hot with her. Is it because she's slutty?
She was perfection in The Informers (the movie itself sucked):
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xeflt1_amber-heard-the-informers_sexy#....
NSFW
I think she's very pretty. Not in that photo, but generally.
Her ex girlfriend Tasya Van Ree? I find her sexy as hell.
Am I gayelle?
Submitted by boredashell on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 10:08pm.
So Johnny is SINGLE??? *puts on lipstick*
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Yes but so are many other lesbians.
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
So Johnny is SINGLE??? *puts on lipstick*
Well he sure has the butch lez look down, bulky tatas with a scarf and everything. I guess she likes em younger.
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"I don't think anything can separate anything that's super-connected. "
-LeAnn Rimes
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Thu, 12/20/2012 - 9:53pm.
@Tigerlilly, but the question is...does he even remember who the real Johnny Depp is?
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TROOF FINDA!!!
GG be findin' some TROOF up in here.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
I just don't see the hot with her. Is it because she's slutty?
Meh. Neither of them is hot enough for me to care.
So it goes.
This just means he has little man's disease.
@Tigerlilly, but the question is...does he even remember who the real Johnny Depp is?
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
I'm sorry louise_brooks, I should have added compared to when he is "rocking out" with some band wearing that horrible black hat with the feathers...gags.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Johnny darling, the fighting the hot look only sorta works while you still got the hot. You are losing the hot and getting a bit middle aged puffy, so it's time to bust out the hot. Lose the hipster French pirate douche look, and just be Johnny Depp.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Depp is a few years away from looking like Keith Richards at the Sandy Hurricane Benefit. Peen must be a smegma delight.
Mike I hear ya. Amber is ridiculously gorge. I liked Johnny in the olden days but I don't believe for a minute that hot ass Amber would be into Depp peen at all. I'm sorry. I call hoax. ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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