That’s a trick question.
The King of Thailand’s 85th birthday was celebrated during the Muay Thai Championship Fights in L.A. over the weekend, and the King of Thailand couldn’t make it because he didn’t have enough miles, so they invited the closest thing they could get to Thai royalty: Courtney Stodden! Doug Hutchison, who looks like if a zombie Efren Ramirez played Aileen Wuornos in Monster, escorted his child bride to the fights and he stood back while his wife showed the people how a true lady of elegance does it.
A true lady wears fake eyelashes made from a dust brush’s dirty bristles. A true lady wears every padded bra in her drawer so that her tits look like two Cornish game hens wearing full diapers. A true lady makes a luxurious stole from Ikea sheepskin rugs. A true lady wears exquisite lucite heels ALWAYS and a gorgeous $12 gown from Joyce Leslie. Those bra straps just top the whole look off.
And I’m pretty sure Doug is trying hard to get an audition for The Walking Dead.