I Don't Know Who Olly Murs Is, But He Wants You To Know That He's Got A Five Incher
If you asked me a couple of days ago who I thought Olly Murs was, I'd guess and say that Olly Murs is the accidental love child Hoops & Yoyo made during a night of awkward drunken cat and rabbit gay sex. (They don't like to talk about it.) But I would've been wrong (I think), because Olly Murs is a British pop singer type who was the runner-up on the sixth season of The X-Factor UK, and now he's known to me as the dude with five fully functional inches of love.
Olly Murs is apparently known for his bulge (see: pictures below of Olly Murs shooting a video in Venice, CA on September 21st. That's not an overfull diaper in Olly's skinny pants. That's his five inch carrot and two avocado seeds.) and so Heat World (via ONTD) asked him about it during an interview. Heat World not only asked him about his bulge, but they also reached new levels of TOO MUCH INFORMATION by asking him to get specific and shit. And Olly did get specific:
"Maybe 13 [cm]? That's what I'd go with - it's definitely not 20cm. It would be quite big. I think 13cm.
It [his bulge] doesn't bother me. I have never, honest to God, tried to emphasise it. It has always been other people. I have never thought of myself as someone who has a big bulge. But this is probably the first time I will be arrogant by saying I have never had a complaint...it's not about the size; it's what you can do with it that counts. It's not about quantity, it's about quality. And I am all about quality."
I love how Olly says "I think." Ho, please. You know he measures it daily. Olly slaps his peen against a ruler and tries to stretch it as far as it will go the same way Tommy Girl stands on his tippity, tippity tip toes when John Travolta's measuring him on a growth chart in the Scientology playroom. "I grew 0.00003 centimeters!" is a line both Tommy Girl and Olly's peen have screamed out recently.
And I bet that when you put all of Olly's 13 centimeters in your mouth, you can articulately say the name "Olly Murs." That's a selling point for 5 inch dicks! Think about that the next time you're about to roll your eyes when a trick on Craigslist tells you that he's only got 5 inches.
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I'd hit it.
Submitted by suckandfuck on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 3:26pm.
Many stinkfish think they know all about sizemeat when in fact, they know absolutely nothing!
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LOL, this is chop suey fallacy. Thank you for not propagating. ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Twatty, hi hi hi sweets! How are you? Won't ask about your friend, sounds grah-oss! ;)
Chick has nice gams - dude, no clue. Looks like too much milking.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Ahahahahaha!
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 3:14pm.
I'll be the John Holmes of Hobbiton :D
I use to play hockey with this guy and he'd always be walkin around the dressing room naked and grabbing his dick talking about bangin chick and stuff "typical locker room talk" anyway the dude dick didn't even hang...at ALL it barely even stuck out of his pubes, it looked like an acorn cap sitting on top of a bird's nest.
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What in the praying mantis crackhooker hell is this?! - MK 9/09
Submitted by tonicbitch on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 3:36pm.
For why is this on my screen?
Because the new version of IsAnyoneUp doesn't go live until next week? :)
Submitted by rovex on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 3:30pm.
Funny how if he isnt known in America he is a 'nobody'. Remember that the US is only 5% of the world folks!
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But in the entertainment world the US is BY FAR the most important country because we buy the most albums and singles, we spend more only on tours, we see the most movies in theaters, we buy the most dvds, etc.
For why is this on my screen?
Maybe he's intentionally lowballing (zing!j it so that all his future sex partners will be surprised/impressed? It's possible.
Also, fat.
GG -- I have a girlfriend who had a freak do that to her, too. She walked out on him. God only knows where the dude's mouth has been, right? He could have been sucking on some Lohan-type fungus-infected feet, or Shitney just-walked-barefoot-in-a-Port-a-Potty feet -- blrrrgghhhh!!!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
I am sorry, but i can`t with small penises. After 18 years of sex with the big dick husband, i m sure I wouldnt be much fun for a small dicked dude either. Give me GIRTH.
Funny how if he isnt known in America he is a 'nobody'. Remember that the US is only 5% of the world folks!
Like the thick thighs.
I like that little chick ass in those cut offs,
When I was 18 all the girls wore cut off and I LIKED IT!!! :P
Submitted by suckandfuck on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 3:26pm.
Many stinkfish think they know all about sizemeat when in fact, they know absolutely nothing!
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OMFG! LMAO!
I'm over this greasy nobody who I have never heard of. Yay you have a small one, want a cookie?
NEXT POST PLEASE.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Submitted by Lesbian Sourfruit on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 3:14pm.
English + penis= tiny dick.
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Many stinkfish think they know all about sizemeat when in fact, they know absolutely nothing!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
@ GG
http://www.blueberryforest.com/images/Images_art/acorn-caps-100x86.jpg
sitting on this...
http://factorydirectcraft.com/pimages/20050930110203-168567/4_natural_bi...
Little girls love him in Ireland. I always thought he was gay! He sucks! Hate his music!
Douche bag extraordinaire !
My friend and I at work were trying to determine what sound a douche would make... Any suggestions?
:O Acorn cap sitting on top of bird's nest...Guffaw!!!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Hey, he's English. Of he thinks he's carrying a night stick in his pants. English + penis= tiny dick.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:59pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:51pm.
Wanna bigger dick? Find a chick with smaller hands!!
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*hands Whamo a ticket to Hobbiton*
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I'll be the John Holmes of Hobbiton :D
I use to play hockey with this guy and he'd always be walkin around the dressing room naked and grabbing his dick talking about bangin chick and stuff "typical locker room talk" anyway the dude dick didn't even hang...at ALL it barely even stuck out of his pubes, it looked like an acorn cap sitting on top of a bird's nest.
BEST.HEADLINE.EVER.
His outfit is ugly and 5 inches isn't bad, but I don't know too many guys who would talk about it with pride.
he reminds me of perez hilton and no i don't want to hit it. not. ever. no.
God knows i love a bulge, i consider myself a bulge aficionado. this guys doesn't have a bulge and his jeans are 80s tight so it should be way more apparent.
p.s. i hate to break the bubble here but size DOES matter. that saying was made up by a man with a small dick.
He does nothing for me.
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What in the praying mantis crackhooker hell is this?! - MK 9/09
Oh Twatty I once had a freak do that to me!! Ahhhhhhhhh *rocks back and forth*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
I want to bang him. EXACTLY the body type I like, perfect penis size.... There's something about 4-5" that hits the spot like nothing else! You can all keep your huge wangs!
Butterfaced, though....
"This world is a whore."
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:59pm.
"...it's not about the size; it's what you can do with it that counts. It's not about quantity, it's about quality."
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All I can think of there is the female equivalent: "Sure, it's like fucking a glass of water, but I GIVE GOOD HEAD DAMMIT!"
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I have a 9" tongue and I can breath through my ears ;)
jack -- I don't blame you about the foot rubbing thing. When friends tell me they make their men rub their feet, I'm like "eeewwww." I would never make a man do that. And BTW, I keep my feet nicely pedicured all the time, and I do not want a man touching my feet. Well, if Jon Hamm insisted on touching them, I guess, but I do not want anyone putting their mouth on them -- that is a total deal-breaker -- I don't care WHO it is!!!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
WTF kind of pants are those? Lederhosen?
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:51pm.
Wanna bigger dick? Find a chick with smaller hands!!
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*hands Whamo a ticket to Hobbiton*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:54pm.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:50pm.
yes, first wife... the minute I walked in the door from work every.fucking.day. I hate feet and refuse to rub another damn one of em...
OT - what Whamo said hahahahahaaa!!! why do you think I date petite chicks!
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LOL! you must really hate feet because it's the one thing I for know SURE about you Jake,
Oh that and you miss that beautiful fridge you use to have! :) lol! Just bustin yer balls dude!
"...it's not about the size; it's what you can do with it that counts. It's not about quantity, it's about quality."
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All I can think of there is the female equivalent: "Sure, it's like fucking a glass of water, but I GIVE GOOD HEAD DAMMIT!"
Those are the single ugliest pants I've ever seen in my life. I don't even know what he sounds like but he needs to fuck off. I hate him by appearance.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:50pm.
yes, first wife... the minute I walked in the door from work every.fucking.day. I hate feet and refuse to rub another damn one of em...
OT - what Whamo said hahahahahaaa!!! why do you think I date petite chicks!
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"A Muppet and his money are soon parted." ~ Lu32Cy (aka Lucifer Sam)
"I'm back. You're Welcome." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by Bunnyman on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:50pm.
Looks like Pete Doherty and a Cabbage Patch doll had a love child. Keep it covered, pudge.
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LMAO!!!
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:34pm.
"it's not about the size; it's what you can do with it that counts. It's not about quantity, it's about quality. And I am all about quality."
In other words, you're a lousy lay.
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Any guy that say it ain't the size that matters is hung like a tic tac!
this person has a giant baby head...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
What's that matter Jack, some hos hold up their crusty corn ridden trotters up to you to rub? Dont worry I keep mine soft. No old lady heels here.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Wanna bigger dick? Find a chick with smaller hands!!
I'm dating a midget, she says I'm HUNG... like an average man, So...I got THAT goin for me!P
Looks like Pete Doherty and a Cabbage Patch doll had a love child. Keep it covered, pudge.
You're getting far too generous with the tags. "And you are..?" will suffice. Or can we expect more stories on this pasty Brit. I once thought One Direction was a weekend story. But still refuse to learn their names.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:46pm.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:37pm.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:34pm.
THERE ARE ALTERNATIVES, LU32CY, LIKE CUNNINNINLINGILINGUSSS YOU KNOW!!?!! *whispers* plus we can mow the yard, take out the trash, kill spiders.... *mumbles inaudible*
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If that is your defense then you better recite War and Peace into my vajayjay, and practice your braille on my twat. And dont forget to rub my feets!
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you lost me at rubbing you freakin FEET...
*stocks up on warm apple pie*
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"A Muppet and his money are soon parted." ~ Lu32Cy (aka Lucifer Sam)
"I'm back. You're Welcome." ~ Kenny Powers
They should be on roller skates.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:37pm.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:34pm.
THERE ARE ALTERNATIVES, LU32CY, LIKE CUNNINNINLINGILINGUSSS YOU KNOW!!?!! *whispers* plus we can mow the yard, take out the trash, kill spiders.... *mumbles inaudible*
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If that is your defense then you better recite War and Peace into my vajayjay, and practice your braille on my twat. And dont forget to rub my feets!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:26pm.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:23pm.
My speakers are broke (aka, I stole them from my office so I can crank up Korn at home while doing domesticated shit).
bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahah!
/pats my monitor from 3 jobs ago. what? they were sending them back to the state for salvage!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Even having a 20-incher wouldn't help when you're stuck with a gay baby face and stupid pants
Submitted by can be a pushy broad on Wed, 11/28/2012 - 2:42pm.
Like the santa hat too.
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thanks, I drew it free-hand... not one lesson!
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"A Muppet and his money are soon parted." ~ Lu32Cy (aka Lucifer Sam)
"I'm back. You're Welcome." ~ Kenny Powers