Hot Slut Of The Day!
The doctor from the #1 reason why most of us were in the emergency room last night for liver failure: Liz & Dick
My drunk ass left the TV on last night, so when I got up this morning and went into the living room, a still of a bloated Lindsay Lohan as Elizabeth Taylor was still on my screen. Walking to the remote to turn that shit off was the worst walk of shame I've ever taken. When I woke up, I didn't even remember watching that wreck, but my TV screen just had to remind me. Looking at LiLo as La Liz on my screen was as embarrassing and shameful as seeing a dirty condom on your floor after the worst drunken one night fuck ever. Liz & Dick wasn't even awful in a HAHA way, it was just awful. But for me, the best part was the doctor who delivered the line of the night.
Liz is in the hospital for a messed up back or some shit, and her doctor strolls in casually and says like nothing, "Listen, I'm not saying it's colon cancer, buuuuuuuut we need to run more tests."
The hell kind of doctor is that? Even the doctors in Liz & Dick were low-budget.
And HSOTD honorable mentions from this wreck go to: the "Slut on a Hot Tin Roof" sign, the "Shoplifting is a Crime" sign, the busted costumes which were all bought from a High School drama department, the wall sized travel posters from my 9th grade world history class which were used as backdrops for "international" locations and Theresa Russell of WHORE who deserves better than this!
I might have more to say later, but for now I leave you with this Emmy-worthy moment from LiLo:
(GIF via ONTD)
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Is that supposed to be fainting? Obviously this trick never learned the ART OF ACTING! Yes, to the hot slut doctor because that is some Oscah-worthy writing! The hair looks good too, hahaha. ;D
Wonder what ratings the re-broadcast will get? lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I might have to catch the rerun of this, just to see how much I can take before I get fed up with it.
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No escapin' when I start
Once I'm in, I own your heart.
I honestly tried...i was gonna try just to see how terrible...but it was too much! I got through minute 7 when Dick was trying to be witty at a restaurant and I said "Enough"
It was worse than I ever could have imagined....I feel for the souls that stuck with it.
I'm so glad I didn't watch this shitfest. I watched Blue Bloods instead.
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What in the praying mantis crackhooker hell is this?! - MK 9/09
Did anyone else notice Lifetime asking "Please keep watching Liz & Dick" when they broke for commercials half way through the crap fest? Even they knew people would tune out after being lulled into a stupor.
Submitted by cocoebert on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 11:51am.
"You are tearing me apart, Richard Burton!"
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by lilywhiteclass on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 11:57am.
Wait… Blohan has fans?
(slits wrists from despair over humanity's stupidity)
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
BEST Twitter comment hands down!!!
"The same peanut butter technique used to make Mr. Ed the talking horse's lips move is working just as well on Lindsay Lohan! #lizanddick"
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
Is it only me seeing a giant nipple in the right foreground of the pic of her lying down?
What tha...
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ha ha maybe lohan will now disappear 4-ever.
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Diz and Lick was Nothing more than a collection of scenes with people reciting lines. Of the core actors, only David Hunt as Richard's brother Ifor really emoted and made me believe it. I wonder how many takes it took Fuckface to get his name right?
"Oh, Eeyore, I...."
"CUT! Lindsay, darling, it's pronounced "EYE-for. OK, love? Action!"
"Oh, Igor, I...."
CUT!!!!!!!!!!
It wasn't just the writing, it was the acting and the makeup, I mentioned this on the other thread but I really think Crackhead told them that she didn't want to look old or fat when she was playing old Liz, they aged everyone else including Liz's mom and Dick, I just don't understand why they didn't do it to her
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I wish I had multiple Alts, that way I won't be so lonely when I'm talking to myself
OH DEAR GOD! According to Radar Online Blohan wants her own sitcom, a comedy. Apparently Charlie Sheen told her she should go for it.
Submitted by MissDior on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 3:52pm.
"she knew the script was weak", but she did her best with what she had!
hahaha. Dang writers, always holding her back. That's kind of a given, when you're reduced to doing crap TV on Lifetime.
And here we go! Article over on Huffington Post about how she's devastated that anyone is criticizing her acting. Also goes on to mention that "she knew the script was weak", but she did her best with what she had! Lol! This bitch is so predictable!
They could have hired a burnt strawberry Toaster Strudel and got a better acting and charisma.
Submitted by Winnyfranfran on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 3:02pm.
I was hungover this morning but that is from my normal Sunday night binge drinking. I didn't watch this mess. I watched The Walking Dead. Same thing, really.
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As was I. But the difference is that everyone on TWD can actually....y'know...act. Even the zombies have more personality than Cokehan.
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Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought that the doctor's lines were crazy, the whole script was just nuts! This entire movie was cheesy as hell
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I wish I had multiple Alts, that way I won't be so lonely when I'm talking to myself
I must have been the only one that was nervous when they were in Bulgari Rome......I am sure Lohan would have copped the Dollar Store costume jewelery just to "keep her hand in the game".
"If Drinks are not involved, then neither am I"
That faint must have been awful if they couldn't even follow her down to the floor. I bet that shitty wig fell off.
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If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it.
The fake faint was terrible. Clu plunk
Then one minute she's fine, then in hospital with 2 broken legs or something, and maybe with cancer then no cancer.
Similar to the great Kim Zolziak "I thought I had cancer, but I didn't"
The ratings for this mess won't be out for a few days. It'd be nice if they could track viewership minute by minute, showing a steep decline after the first 10 minutes, then flat-lining after 30 minutes when the novelty wore out.
I was hungover this morning but that is from my normal Sunday night binge drinking. I didn't watch this mess. I watched The Walking Dead. Same thing, really.
I prefer my Teresa Russell in 'Impulse',getting down with the yummy Jeff Fahey!
Seriously, where's the boooze?
TWD was on at 6pm here for me, so I was able to watch that, then at 9pm I started watching this and by 9:45 I was over it and headed to bed. It was so God awful I WANTED to go to bed.
The zombies on The Walking Dead are better actors than than Hohan, so I'm glad I totally forgot about this hot mess and watched them instead.
Enjoying the comments from Dlisters who took one for the team though :)
In the first half hour, the only half hour I watched, there was a close up of her face and the blue contacts were WONKY! It was a hoot!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
"I'M BORED! I AM SO BORED"
Yes Lindsay, that is exactly how I felt last night.
Hey, hey! Three cheers for the violet contact lenses!
THEY deserve the Emmy!
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Fair is foul and foul is fair..
Submitted by Ophelias evil twin on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:38pm.
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:34pm.
Submitted by purin:
Did she say, :"I ahsked them not to do the movie, I demahnd their soooouls"?
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Can I get a link to the doctor clip, please???? I've been hearing about it all morning, and I wish I'd seen it. But after 22 minutes, my bullshitometer was in the red and steaming, so I had to turn this mess off.
ROFL Hohan's The Faint is almost as bad as Keanu's The Sneeze!!
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Let's face it, Liz and Dick stank. *sprays Febreeze in thread*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
@ Danniee - OT but BE was great last night. Lots of Chalky White and a surprise at the end. You'll love it. I'm saving up to watch Homeland tonight!
On topic: Lindsay is merely a thesBian and not entirely responsible for this mess. BUT I just ran over to Gawker to watch the worst clips video and her face is on it and that is all we will remember. My old NY film-acting teacher, Bob Brady, would have called it "indicating" (Oh look, it's a plane) and that is not so good.
Hahaha Michael!! OMG there were so many bad lines like this.
Hey wife, now soon ex-wife kthxbai.
Oh so glad he didn't marry that girl he was engaged to, whew cool.
The only redeeming thing about this movie (besides Burton) was taking part in the delicious flaming of La Lo. Feel the burn, bitch.
<""Listen, I'm not saying it's colon cancer, buuuuuuuut we need to run more tests."">
I did a double take there, too. Five minutes later same doctor declares her the "healthiest person in the room!"
Thank you Thank you! The only moment I wanted to see again and captured was "Richard is dead". Do they give Oscars for two seconds of sheer brilliance on TV? White Oprah wants to know.
I survived 40 minutes of this shitfest, and had to change the channel.
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"Elizabeth was drunk on sets. I've never been drunk on set, ever. I did my time and I respect the law."
-Lindsay Lohan 11/2012
I watched it hoping it would be so cheesy bad it would be fun to watch. Instead it was so awful ugly it was embarrassing. I felt I had to turn my head away to be kind. No eye contact.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
X'D
Purin, you have got to be fuckin kidding me, an invisible, afterlife interview??? What the actual fuck, priceless!
And this movie isn't even of the so bad it's good Showgirls variety??? Well whats the fucking point? I guess my eyes will never grace this shitious facsimile of a film.
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe energy. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
I feel so bad for both Elizabeth and Richard's children. terrible terrible movie. How bloated can a young girl be???
Thanks, OET--- that was even more shitastic than I thought! Holy crap, she really does suck.
The ending was great
LIZ
KEPT RICHARD'S LETTERS
UNTIL
THE DAY
SH
E
D
I E
D
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
for the Dlisted lovelies that didn't get to see Hohan's fantabulous acting skills.... enjoy!
http://gawker.com/5963250/here-are-the-highlights-of-lindsay-loahns-atro...
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:34pm.
There are interview fragments through the movie, but by the end liz and grant are being interviewed but grant is already dead on the story
Submitted by purin on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:26pm.
I can't believe bitches ended the movie with Liz being interviewed in the afterlife, lmfaooo
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Ok, now a smidgen of me wishes I had watched the whole thing. I wanted my zombies to be entertaining though so I switched over to the Walking Dead.
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:34pm.
Submitted by purin: "I can't believe bitches ended the movie with Liz being interviewed in the afterlife, lmfaooo"
Hooker say what? Wow, "Diz and Lick" really was bad! LOL, they thought they were being profound!!
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They were talking to nobody and it was REDICK! Didn't they learn anything from Clint interviewing the empty chair?
Submitted by Persistent Cat on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:20pm.
I loved how they were trying to go for a subtle sub-text of the intrusion of the paparazzi. But nothing was subtle in that movie. It started off being hilariously awful and then became just awful and then became boringly awful.
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Boring is the worst of it. I thought I'd be laughing more.
Submitted by purin: "I can't believe bitches ended the movie with Liz being interviewed in the afterlife, lmfaooo"
Hooker say what? Wow, "Diz and Lick" really was bad! LOL, they thought they were being profound!!
I wish they actually COULD interview Liz in the afterlife to see what she would say about this fuckery! That would be a hoot.
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:20pm.
Submitted by Ophelias evil twin on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:09pm.
omg her profile in that pic. I imagine this is what she will look like in her coffin.
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She'll look more lifelike. She looks like a dollar store mannequin in that shot with the doctor.
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puffy face and lips. They found vodka and scripts after she crashed into that truck so the puffyness is understandable. So what is she gonna do now besides dodge the backlash? Isn't she supposed to be charged ? We have that to look forward to I suppose..