Open Post: Hosted By Val Chmerkovskiy’s Bulge

November 20, 2012 / Posted by:

I haven’t watched Dancing with the Has-Beens and Never Wases since Nancy Grace’s Frisbee nipple flopped right out of her dress, so I only found out recently that Val Chmerkovskiy is a bona fide asshole who’s got douche syrup running through his veins just like his brother. But what I want to know is, when Val gets all mad and throws a dance floor hissy fit, does he puff his bulge as well as his chest? I bet his bulge looks so cute when it gets mad. And yes, this clip from last night’s show has proven to me that ABC should cancel this wreck and put all their money (and rolled-up tennis socks) into Dancing with the Hard Bulges.

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