Hillary Clinton can cancel her trip to the Middle East, because future Secretary of State Kim Kartrashian is on her way there (sort of, not really) and will make everything better.
A few days ago, Pimp Mama Kris’ prized pig got a bunch of death threats after she tweeted her support for Israel, and later Palestine, while not knowing what in the hell she was talking about. Kim is going to Kuwait and Bahrain to show her plastic face at the openings of several Millions of Milkshakes and while she’s there she plans to get educumacateded on the conflict in the Middle East.
A source tells TMZ that Kim has already set up meetings with local leaders, because “she wants to be as informed as possible … so she can use her celebrity to help those in need and raise awareness about important issues in the area.”
Oh, to be a fly on Kim’s ass when the local leaders try to keep her attention by acting out the history of the Israeli–Palestinian conflict using dick puppets. I mean, Kim Kuntrashian is not one to look away from dick puppets. You know, I’ll give Kim a break this time. Bitch is so dumb that I’m surprised she didn’t go to the Morocco Pavilion at Epcot Center to try to learn about the conflict between Israel and Palestine. (“She already did.” – a cast member at the Morocco Pavilion)
Here’s Kim and the slower one getting the Key to Miami at some ceremony the other day. When Kim’s off trying to bring peace to the Middle East, Miami should change the locks.