And here I go again writing “And Here We Go Again” for a headline, because it feels like we’re always going again with this bitch.
The Santa Monica City Attorney’s Office is supposed to hit the darling of the California justice system, Lindsay Lohan, with a criminal charge of telling lies to the police, because she denied driving the Porsche that butt fucked an 18-wheeler hard on PCH. LiLo told police she was only a passenger, but a bunch of witnesses say she was the one behind the wheel. Charges will be filed any second now and as soon as they are, TMZ says that her probation will be yanked away and she could be escorted to the nearest jail cell.
Judge Stephanie, who put LiLo on probation in the stolen necklace case, won’t be involved in this next messy chapter and the probation case has been handed to a new judge. Judge Jane Godfrey is expected to revoke LiLo’s probation and everybody including LiLo’s dumb ass will be dragged back into court for another hearing.
Lying to the cops while you’re on probation is a dumb bitch movie, but Lindsay Lohan has perfected and trademarked the art of the dumb bitch move. We shouldn’t be surprised, and once again the Santa Monica City Attorney’s Office is wasting everyone’s time. Nothing’s going to happen to LiLo and in fact, she’s going to sue them for robbing thousands of dollars of coke from her nose. Because as soon as they charge her with criminal lie-telling, she’s going to laugh so hard that all the coke she snorted up that morning is going to blow out of her nostrils and mouth. The Judge will sentence everyone in the Santa Monica City Attorney’s Office to jail and force them to replace LiLo’s lost coke. And that’s how this is going to end.
LiLo: 2 new 8-balls
The CA Justice System: ZERO!