Hot Slut Of The Day!
Millions of years before Rihanna, Lil' Kim, Khia and Kenny Chesney (see: "Keg in the Closet," which is basically about a glory hole) were singing about sucking dick, classically trained composer, pianist (more like, "peenanist") and chanteuse Barbara Markay graced the musical world with her poetic lyrics of true romance. Barbara Markay makes New Age music now, but in the 80s she really made music that tingled the soul and other parts.
To fully understand Barbara's artistry, you have to read a small taste of her lyrics from her salsa disco masterpiece "Give Your Dick To Me." If William Shakespeare had a chance to re-write Cleopatra's Act I monologue from Antony & Cleopatra, it would read like this:
You can give your love to your mother
You can give your head to your coat
You can give your heart to your music
And honey that ain't no jokeBut since you sure know how to use it
Give your dick to me
Give it to me
And now for the full song:
The song that would later go on to become Scientology's official anthem wasn't the only ode to getting dicked aria in Barbara's heart. She also released this classic:
If you weren't ever planning on getting married, I'm sure you just changed your mind. Because "Give Your Dick To Me" is the song you must walk down the aisle to and "It's All Rite" must be your first dance with your piece.
Barbara graduated from the Juilliard School of Music, of course, and I'm sure she'll go back one day to teach a master class in singing about sucking dick. I'll sign Rihanna up now, because she needs a lesson or two.
(For suckandfuck)
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especially when it is for a luxury brand? "Pierre cardin" (we don't think it is a real luxury brand) was extended to wine, produced a "Pierre cardin" wine, but failed. If the "Nike" dare to do so, also must have good luck is not long. "Remy Martin" if successfully launched a shampoo, "p&g" must be the foam with rage.
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I think Barbara may already have a dick of her own.
i need this for my ringtone!!!!
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Next time I'm trynna get in my boyfriend's pants, I will be moonwalking across the bedroom to this song. FACT.
I love suckandfuck!
I love suckandfuck!
Submitted by Migraineuse on Sun, 11/18/2012 - 2:51am.
Person on the cover was definitely not born a female.
Because she doesn't conform to the standards of beauty set by the patriarchy? What an ugly misogynistic thing to say. When the fuck are you going to get your principles straight? Piss off, cunt.
If you listen to both songs sixty six times, your dick will be hers.
My aunt and uncle's 55th wedding anniversary is coming up, I wonder if they'd mind if I put the needle on the record with this gem....
@boredasfuckyo and salacious
As a Seattleite, I hate the fugliness that is Macklemore. He has zero personality, he looks like The Sherminator (the nerdy guy from American Pie), and his songs are stupid and boring. All he raps about is how great Seattle is and how he doesn't like to spend too much money on clothes. #RichWhitePersonProblems
And he's a 30-something white man trying to become a rapper. He doesn't even look young. You can tell Mackletard is an old white guy and it's just sad. (Thirties arent old but they are if you're a white rapper.) Time for him to stop trying to be Seattle's biggest embarrassment and get a real job.
Christina Aguilera is doing a cover of this on her new album.
Barbara is still awesome and talented, and she heals! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JF-Ru5dgldM
Submitted by mefunigirl on Sat, 11/17/2012 - 8:58pm.
it's always the least sexy people who are shoving it in your face.
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This.
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Submitted by Darknight on Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:27pm.
THE TRUTH. Making the world a better place.
Person on the cover was definitely not born a female.
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Submitted by Darknight on Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:27pm.
THE TRUTH. Making the world a better place.
bwahaaaa! I was so mesmerized by that godawful photo, that I JUST noticed there was a 2nd song.
Great use of your Juilliard edja-ma-cation, there, Barbara!
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=ruef7aYCEbc&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3Dru...
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RIMADYL KILLS
This reminds me of the classic hit "Let me smell yo Dick."
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I would so hit that
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Sat, 11/17/2012 - 11:51pm.
Just what every Carnival Cruise orgy needs!
LOL! Yes the Carnival Dancers would have a blast with this one right after cocktails!
Seriously I would LMAO if you sang this on the Captains Karaoke night!
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Who are we kidding...this is what pimp mama Kris and Deena play for their chirrun's before they go to kindergarten.
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The album cover is pure class.
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Drunks as skunks
Just what every Carnival Cruise orgy needs!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
"That's a mannn, baby!"
Love the total cheese/sleaze factor.
Keepin' it classy there...
That top photo is terrifying. Did she have masectomy?
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Sat, 11/17/2012 - 4:59pm.
Same. I was tempted to send him the masterpiece "thrift shop" by a rapper named Macklemore, but he would never make it hot slut, or even an open post, even though its fucking aweeesoooome!
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Oh LOL, I love that song and I've been listening to it non stop for two days. It's just one of those songs that's immediately catchy, but not in an annoying way like "Call Me Maybe" or "Gangnam Style". I bet MK would give it a seal of approval.
I discovered yesterday on KEXP, a Seattle based radio station. Mike would like it for sure.
The top photo looks like she previously had open heart surgery...
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...the end
a. she looks like she just sharted and b. wtf is going on w her cleavage?
Is she supposed to be sexy in that pic? Looks like an ad for Martha Stewart bed linens. Boooooring. Also mariachi music and those sexless lyrics definitely don't work together. Hayle no.
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"You wait. They gonna get everybody on twitter, facebook, doing everythin' online and then they gonna pull the PLUG and we all gonna be FUCKED!"
it's always the least sexy people who are shoving it in your face.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
YAAASSSS!!!
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There might have been a time when I would let you slip away
I wouldn't even try
But I think you could save my life
I love how this bitch has the nerve to look totally unfuckable with the champagne and everything like that classes her up! SHE IS AND FOREVER WILL BE A DLISTED GODDESS FOR THAT. Honestly I thought she was Linda LoveLace when I first laid eyes on her.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Dedicated to sucky! love it.
This is going to be my new ringtone. OH YEAH, can't wait till my phone gets off on this in Walmart
OMG! NO FAIR! SUCKY GETS HIS OWN DLISTED THEME SONG!
Oh
my
God
...
...
...
YYYYYEEEEEEESSSSSS!!!!
This song has made my entire life. I need a drag performance of this.
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Taking crazy things seriously is a serious waste of time."
— Haruki Murakami
How have I made it all these years and never heard "Give Your Dick to Me?" Damn, MK, that was awesome. You have made my day.
"Thank goodness I was able to pull out"
That's what he said!
THis is the most awesome shit ever- HILARIOUS! AND she a Julliard grad. I played this right at my boyfriend was getting up this morning- he didn't even hear the lyrics haha OMG I LOVE HER
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.
I only got through 18 seconds. Clearly, Juilliard doesn't prepare you for the rigors of writing disco anthems. Also, what the hell does "You can give your head to your coat" mean??
Phuck. This song has given me an insatiable culinary boner for a Brianno's Deli Italia hot sausage hoagie with peppers. *fires up sled and screams onto the interstate*
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I fucking love this bitch. Love.
$100 says Barbara used to be Brian.
Both these songs are suckandfuck's anthem. Too bad Kristen Wiig never got the chance to play this chick on SNL because she looks just like her.
Submitted by salacious on Sat, 11/17/2012 - 4:34pm.
And whose dick are yous'all slores giving to whom????
I have an equally trashtastic song recommendation for MK, but since he never reads my emails, I will hold off on sharing it for a while.
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Same. I was tempted to send him the masterpiece "thrift shop" by a rapper named Macklemore, but he would never make it hot slut, or even an open post, even though its fucking aweeesoooome!
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
I am TOTALLY switching this out at Christmas with my moms holiday CD!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Aw, sucky...:-)
I lasted until 37 seconds but only because the opening verses started putting me into a trance. Thank goodness I was able to pull out!
Lmao@ SuckandFuck got some recognition!
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
wow
She looks like Carrot Top in the first foto.
*vomits*