Night Crumbs

Allow me to put this as eloquently as possible: Chiiiiiiichiiiiiis!!! – Popoholic

Are we sure it was Johnny Depp and Amber Heard and not a Puerto Rican hippie lesbian and Amber Heard? – Lainey Gossip 

Someone on Twitter said that Joe Biden looks like one of Blanche’s boyfriends on the Golden Girls and ever since that was pointed out I’ve been wishing we could all go back in time so that could come true. But I guess he’ll be okay on Parks & Recreation – Towleroad

CaCa in a ‘kini – Hollywood Tuna 

An artist’s rendering of what Justin Bieber’s blow-up doll looks like with a wig on it – The Superficial 

If someone gave me a baby for every time a tabloid said Jennifer Aniston was knocked up, I’d almost have a child army big enough to take down Brangelina’s child army – IDLYITW

A Satanic cult orgy in a barn, just another weeknight for Ke$hit – Drunken Stepfather

Since Christmas music already blares in my ears when I go to CVS, I’ll give into these Charlie Brown Christmas posters – The Berry 

Reese Witherspoon’s baby friend likes the taste of denim. It’s delicious. – Popsugar

Vanessa Hudgens probably just gone done with wiping away the lipstick stains Zac Efron left on her cooze and now she’s trying to screw with Xtina? Those lipstick stains will take years to wipe off. – ICYDK

Fifty Shades of Chicken (sadly this doesn’t star Phoebe Price) – OMG Blog 

And just like that, a wave of side-eyes from Kirstie Alley, Mo’Nique, Melissa McCarthy and Rebel Wilson hit Jennifer Lawrence – Celebitchy

Somebody get a dictionary, put it front of Vh1 and point to the definition of DIVA. Or just get Aretha Franklin to slap them for thinking these tricks are diva status – Just Jared

White people mourning Romney. That is all. – Crunk + Disorderly 

I’m surprised Billy Ray Cyrus didn’t come out in a banana hammock – SOW

Charlie Sheen threatened to Kelly Preston a dude – Hollywood Rag  

Maybe Pippa is just on her period a lot – Cityrag

Pete Cambell likes to get fisted… in the face – Videogum

The incredibly shrinking JHud is done shrinking – I’m Not Obsessed