Getting Plastered On The Job: Diane Sawyer Is Just Like Us!
You weren't the only one drunkenly slurring out nonsense about exclamation points and music (Wurr's da muzak?!) during last night's 12-hour-long America's Next Top President season finale, so was Diane Sawyer. Maybe! Since the Food Network didn't air a special election night cocktail party hosted by Drunk Ass Sandra Lee and NBC made the wrong decision by not making Kathie Lee Gifford the star of their election night news coverage, somebody had to get drunk and deliver the news with a slur and that somebody was Diane Sawyer.
As George Stethoscopeolous sat there, dreading the moment when he'll have to hold back Diane's hair as she drunk barfs into a trash can in his dressing room later in the night, Diane asked who ever to play the music, rambled on about whatever and sometimes she looked like you when you're drunk as all shit in front of your parents and concentrating hard on trying to look sober.
Sure, it's possible that Diane Sawyer hasn't slept since the last election ended and was suffering from the chronic tireds, but it's more fun to think of her starting off her night right by buttchugging chardonnay and snorting whole Xanax pills.
The news should always look like this.
via Gawker
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SNot drunk, sounds more like on pain meds or flexeril. I am presently on flexeril for this nasty sciatica and it does make one a bit loopy. And she's sitting kinda funny. My guess is she's probably hurt but was like "Fuckit, the show must go on! Gimme some drugs!"
Hey, just noticed the clock is a bit off here, lol MK, it's spring forward, fall BACK, isn't it? ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Foxxy, that would explain it, IT WAS THE STRESS, the stress, I TELL YA! No wonder there's a hint smile on his face! lol
*please join me for another - chug chug chug -*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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@ Within -- lol, unless she's been born again and baptized in blue, Sawyer is a Republican (worked for nixon) so i don't think she was doing any celebrating last night...
*waves back like a drunken...well, me*
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Thu, 11/08/2012 - 4:25am.
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But Foxxy, it'd be SO much better if she WERE drunkards, OLOL compared to morning show hosts, she's toasted, err... totes ok, only a tad sedated is all. Maybe she had root canal work done just before this aired, we don't know!
*waves like a drank-assed anchor* ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by WithinReason... on Thu, 11/08/2012 - 4:20am.
Teee hee heee, George is the best co-host, he hardly blinked, haha.
George was spawned from the world of politics. he's long accustomed to working with drunks ;-)
/really don't think she was drunk, just exhausted. the NBC crew was getting a little loose by the end of the night too
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Teee hee heee, George is the best co-host, he hardly blinked, haha.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Ali Wentworth was the hot white chick on In Living Color 20 years ago...man, she aged HARRRRRD O.o
The best was watching George's face. He never let go of that tight lipped smirk. I think he was afraid to say anything.
Priceless.
Something's clearly wrong with her, but I refuse to believe she was drunk. Not my Diane, not on election night. #DENIAL
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Diane is the best of the best and she's 66 years old!!! She was probably exhausted after the unending election nonsense. There's no way she was drunk or loaded.
She looks and acts like I did when I had to take prescription narcotics for my neck. People made fun of me--it would have made me sad had I not been so stoned.
I heard this on The Bert Show this morning and I really hope that Diane wasn't high or drunk. She's too professional to go out like that. Sorry, but Team Diane on this one.
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Well, this day has turned to total butt-dust.
Submitted by bourgie on Wed, 11/07/2012 - 2:47pm.
Yeah, because the majority of politicians aren't white males or anything.
Here's what we won't see: a woman. Sure, the ol' boys club can handle the idea of a black man in office, since it makes them look so wonderfully tolerant and progressive. But a WOMAN, with her menses and uteri and whatnot? NEVER! Keep the women standing by smiling like idiots, supporting their menfolk as they should be.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
She didn't seem drunk to me.
Don't know what was going on with her. But she looks sooooo good. Isn't she like 65?
I couldn't think of a better night be sloppy drunk. OMG haven't heard about Jessica Savitch in years. She was a hot mess. Talk about suck and blow...
the game is we're supposed to take a drink every time she screws up, not the other way around! ;>
whata mess
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"I wanta see some character" - David Rocco making pesto
Foxxy -- if anyone is going to get DP'ed by Meloni & Harmon, it's me, ya hear? ME!!!
islandgirl -- I love this rendering of Giada.
http://www.galleryoftheabsurd.com/2010/05/celebrity-chef-dog-foods-giada...
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
That sounds like it's been slowed down.
yeah it's not real. but it's funny
WTF? She always sounds like that.
You guys make it sound like liking wienner is bad? So nature provided her with a mouth that can suck 8 dicks at once.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
She's not his well known in UK so Googled her.66? Wow.If you can look like that past retirement age you can do whatever you like ! By the way-congratulations US fine results all round.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 11/07/2012 - 3:45pm.
hey, Twat -- i hear Meloni and Harmon dp'ed Giada a couple of weeks ago. you got any strong feelings about that?
lmao
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Twat, LOL at the Giada hate. I can't stand her either! She's like a human Pez dispenser/bobble-headed hybrid.
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/file.php?40,file=39302,filename=...
NDNchief -- I know, isn't her head huge? And that big old mouth so she can shove more dicks in it. Yuck.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 11/07/2012 - 2:51pm.
Hekki -- I CANNOT STAND GIADA!!! That fucking slut will fuck anything that moves!!! Haven't you heard the stories? OMG, supposedly Rachael Ray calls her the Blowjob Queen. Giada thinks she's so sexy, hikes up whatever boobs she has to look like she's busty (she isn't that busty), and will screw anything. Slut. She probably has several STDs. I don't care that she's married with kid -- chick be a 'ho.
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Don't forget her big ole head that makes her arms look like T-rex arms.
How old is Diane? She is still beautiful.
I don't know. She always seems like she talks slow, slurred to me. I don't see a difference between this and any other time she talks.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Submitted by Anita Bidet on Wed, 11/07/2012 - 2:47pm.
nobody can top jeff goldblum drunk
http://youtu.be/dQmK1CnwOUI
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That sounds like it's been slowed down.
Lmao. Drunkay!
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"I think my butt looks too big in these jeans."
Yeah, watching her last night did make me like her again! She gets so smarmy... makes me cringe... but last night she was FUCKED UP! Fun times indeed!!!
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Back from vacation? Vacation from where? The Willy Wonka factory? The Al Jolson Resort? MERCURY? MK - 8/1/12
i think we all need to start writing the Food Network now and for the next three years to lobby for a Sandra Lee Election Night Party show for 2016. and i am quite serious about that.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Many were celebrating.
Hekki -- I CANNOT STAND GIADA!!! That fucking slut will fuck anything that moves!!! Haven't you heard the stories? OMG, supposedly Rachael Ray calls her the Blowjob Queen. Giada thinks she's so sexy, hikes up whatever boobs she has to look like she's busty (she isn't that busty), and will screw anything. Slut. She probably has several STDs. I don't care that she's married with kid -- chick be a 'ho.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
Good writing MK. You made me like Diane again!
nobody can top jeff goldblum drunk
http://youtu.be/dQmK1CnwOUI
Her husband's birthday was yesterday so maybe she had one too many glasses of wine over dinner? To me, she sounds just like she does every night on world news. No difference really.
I;m not sure..maybe I was drunk but George S had the comedy gold of the night.
they were breaking down the categories of who voted for whom and that even with all the "white" people voting, they still could not get Romney elected..George S said that this is a milestone no more will we see two white men fighting for the presidency..yes sir no more white men against each other in an election. He kept on with that, and I thought WTF? Then he caught himself and realized that it's been 8 years already since two white guys were running aganst each other for the presidency. Unless he considers Pres. Obama white.....
Submitted by Twat Muffin: "Stan Hooper -- yeah, Savannah is really dorky, I can't imagine her banging Matt, maybe some dorky accountant type, but I don't find Natalie particularly sexy either. She's okay, but not a sex bomb either. I'd like to see Matt with some va-va-va-voom type -- his head would probably be spinning!"
Do you guys remember when he was on location with Giada? ETA: They were in Barbados. Holy fuck, she looked like the cat that ate the canary. (Yeah, HIS canary, hahaha!) Maybe they did and maybe they didn't, but I totally got that vibe. He seemed all sheepish and she was gloaty.
I was watching a segment while making the bed and I had to sit down and watch, because something about those two set off my fuckdar. "Are those two... DOING IT?"
Again, I could be wrong, but I think he nailed it.
Submitted by Stan Hooper on Wed, 11/07/2012 - 2:33pm.
Oh, shit. I was getting her confused with that other whore, Natalie Morales. He's fucking Natalie, but I think he tried to nail Savannah or something.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Stan Hooper -- yeah, Savannah is really dorky, I can't imagine her banging Matt, maybe some dorky accountant type, but I don't find Natalie particularly sexy either. She's okay, but not a sex bomb either. I'd like to see Matt with some va-va-va-voom type -- his head would probably be spinning!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
You guys I am not a fan of Savannah either. Something about her rubs me the wrong way. I agree with Hekki - stealth slut.
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"Bye, Whore" -MK
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Wed, 11/07/2012 - 1:25pm.
Chris..did you see her this AM with those goofy glasses.Goes perfect with her goofy teeth and personality.Matt must be hard up if this is what he is banging?? His wife is a good looking woman...
But if Matt is banging Natalie..Whole different can of beans there! That lady is sexy!!
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
Submitted by Twat Muffin: "Hekki -- you think Savannah is a whore? She seems so dorky to me. She looks like one of those Kennedy women, big-boned, all teeth, not overly feminine at all."
She's a "stealth slut".
It's not that bad! Lol get your drunk on Diane!
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I like to smile, smiling's my favorite! : )
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
I think she was exhausted. Noone can fault her for one on-air buzz on election day. If anyone needs to pull the rehab card it's Kathy Lee. Me thinks she keeps her head in a fuzz to avoid acknowledging she is old and she's married to a corpse.
@kortni_thegreat I just met David Muir last night and he is the hotness...until he opens his mouth. I like it when he stands around furrowing his brow and looking zexy.
Submitted by paulapoo on Wed, 11/07/2012 - 1:11pm.
Jessica Savitch wants to know why this bitch gets away with being shitfaced for minutes on end, when she herself was only shitfaced for a piddly-poo 60-second news break.
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Probably because Savitch was a bit of a mean drunk.
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