When the piece who you were married to for five whole seconds shows up at the same Lakers game as you, let him know all the wonderful goodness his CDC enemy #1 dick is missing out on by miming a hot, sloppy hand job (or maybe she’s a miming a hot, sloppy beej, which explains why her mouth isn’t opened that wide). Katy Perry should’ve really made this totally realistic by wearing the same safety goggles she wore every time she got down to get Russell off. A trick has to protect her eyes from falling crabs.
Katy and her really hot dad, who is always serving up some Uncle Fester as a biker bartender realness, went to the Lakers vs. Mavericks game at the Staples Center in L.A. and sat near her ex-husband Russell Brand who was there with two boys. Katy proved to Russell that she’s happy by acting really, really, really happy. Bitch put on a real “SEE! I’m happier without you because I’m laughing REALLY hard” show. If John Mayer was there with her, all the black people would have to get up and leave, because she would’ve really shown Russell that she’s moved on by canoodling with John’s David Duke Dick out in the open. I wish John Mayer was there. A piece of human tampon lint (who’s always dressed like the douche bag character in an Archie comic) getting into a slap fight with a human Fem-V pantyliner (who’s always dressed like a Thunderdome go-go dancer) would’ve made for the perfect Halloween time show.