Okay…But What In The Hell Is Lisa Turtle Wearing?

October 25, 2012 / Posted by:

Lark Voorhies and her mom Tricia had opposite opinions on the state of her mental health in People Magazine earlier this month. Tricia said that Lark is bi-poplar, but doesn’t want to get help and doesn’t really take her meds. (In Lark’s defense, it’s kind of hard to take her meds when that junkie whore Jessie Spano keeps stealing them from her medicine cabinet.) Lark said that she isn’t bi-polar and yes, she’s a little hazy in the brains, but that’s just because she’s a very spiritual person who is thinking thoughts all the time. Well, as Lark and a man friend left some restaurant in L.A. last night TMZ asked her about her mom saying she’s bi-polar. Lark took a quick minute to meditate and let the spirits whisper a response into her brain before she said:

“Well I think it quite comical… I’ll put it to you like this, outside contract, everything is funny. Beautiful pictures though, don’t you think?”

Lisa Turtle went on to talk about other shit too including how we’re all spiritually in tune with an informant connection, or something like that. Lisa Turtle talks like me if I drank a whole bottle of absinthe and tried to do an impersonation of Audrey Hepburn in Always.

Yes, Lisa Turtle talks and carries herself like the pilled-up matriarch of a wealthy New England family who is about to tell her children that she’s cut all of them out of the will, but it really doesn’t matter if she’s bi-polar or not. I’m more concerned about that make-up and outfit. GUUURRRRRL. That’s an outfit that Dorothy Zbnorak would look at in the Memaw of the Bride section at Sears and quickly shoo it away because it’s TOO obvious.

Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

alt="drupal analytics" >