If the one hundred percent truth trickled out of Wyclef Jean’s mouth and he told us that all donations to his Yele Haiti charity, go toward him buying more Speedos, body butter and Ducati bikes, I might open up my PayPal wallet to drop a quarter in (no, I wouldn’t), because then we’d get more priceless pictures of NAST like this one. The almost president of Haiti celebrated 43 years on Planet Earth by tweeting this messy portrait to his followers with the note:
TODAY I AM 43 YEARS OLD! I look And feel 26! U cant keep à good Man down! Keep à smile when they want you to frown!
Wyclef wants us to smile with our mouths, but yet he tweets a picture that’s making all three of my mouths frown? Okay. But seriously, this picture is making me want to drop a quarter into Yele Haiti’s donation cup (if it’s still open). Because obviously Wyclef only had enough money to oil up half of his body. The top of Wyclef is greasier than a power top’s dick at a butt orgy full of hungry bottoms, but his leg is as dry as my tongue when I look at this picture. We, as a people, can’t let this happen. For just 10 cents a day, you can keep ALL of Wyclef’s body oiled up.
(Thanks, Jon & Felicia)