Katy, Get Your Paw Away From That KKKock, It's Too Early For That
Seen here looking like a sad couple leaving the free clinic after learning some devastating news (the devastating news being that she's knocked up, because even they know a MayKat baby is not what humanity needs EVER), Katy Perry and John Mayer left a restaurant in NYC last night. While Mitt Romney was quickly losing the highly important and coveted Trapper Keeper vote, Katy and John were out celebrating the 35th anniversary of the day David Duke's used butt enema fertilized a pine cone tampon and made John Mayer.
For his very special day, John Mayer dressed up as a half-assed Canadian groomsman and used globs of pussy lube to style his hair like a douche bag cockatoo who thinks he's the shit. Dude's douche hair matches his smug face.
And all morning hate aside, that picture above is sort of sweet. I mean, obviously there's a non-whitey standing in front of them, so Katy is covering the one eye on John Mayer's white power peen, because it doesn't want to see that. That's real love.
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He looks soooooo old. Is he 41? She must have herp 10 times over....if one in five people have it, think about the total between Travie, Russell and MayWhore....what is 1500 divided by 5......ick!
Jeez, Katy and Ri Ri are so fucking bored. What would those two do if they didn't have d-bag boyfriends and constant drama? They'd probably curl up and die without all that negative attention.
...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...
What the fuck is she thinking? She's supposed to get an upgrade after Brand! I'm not a huge fan of her music and she's harmless to me, but I wouldn't wish the Mayer plague upon anyone, except for a Turdashian.
He isn't even handsome... he has the complexion of Pete Doherty. I don't know why he continues to date pretty girls. When was the last time he had a hit record anyway?
the day David Duke's used butt enema fertilized a pine cone tampon and made John Mayer
the day David Duke's used butt enema fertilized a pine cone tampon and made John Mayer
the day David Duke's used butt enema fertilized a pine cone tampon and made John Mayer
so funny it needs repeating.
also isn't he wearing a canadian tuxedo, or do his jeans have to be the same wash as his jacket?
Tigerlilly, LOL at his grammy dressing him. It's probably his "good guy" outfit too. Can't see his appeal but he's seems less scruffy than Brand.
Look at Katy copping a feel, haha ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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thats the BOX. Hardly a "Restaurant".
John Mayer looks like a speshul Piggly Wilggly bag boy whose grammy dressed him for a pity date with the Homecoming Queen who will be praised Sunday in church for her 'charity' after making fun of him Saturday night over cheap beers, pilfered cigarettes and ditch weed with her friends in the parking lot behind the town's fanciest restaurant (aka Shoney's).
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
That's the ugliest dress I've ever seen.
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No escapin' when I start
Once I'm in, I own your heart.
I think they belong together. I don't feel sorry for kateshit either. This dumbass exploited gays for initial fame and then uses child porn imagery to sell to little kids. Squirting whip cream out of your tits in a magical candy land for a video is just disgusting and disturbing considering her fans' demographic. Glad she's sticking to him. And I also wish gay clubs would stop playing her music.
They look so ugly together. How nice for them.
They're on their way back to her place to play a rousing game of "Who's a Bigger Whore."
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Why is Katy Perry dating a valet parking attendant?
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"When in doubt, freak 'em out" -- Sharon Needles
grody to the max!! You could seriously not PAY me enough $ to hang out with that Mayer turd.
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"If French is the language of love, then Spanish is the language of badassery!" -MK
Cat >^,,^<
Submitted by catfight357 on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 1:35pm.
Ok so we all agree he's like painfully ugly right? This isn't just a case of being not photogenic.
Ok... he looks awful here. but there are some pics where he looks amazing... but it's been awhile. The guy fascinates me for some reason.. don't flame me.. i know... the issues I have! Say what you will.. he has great hair and he can play that guitar! I do agree the best comments are the John Mayer comments... hysterically funny.
Nothing but nothing says Gigantic Douche like John Mayer.
In addition, I agree with the others who say that there is something up with this chick and this douche. I believe she is nothing like her kid-friendly image.
I call in to question any celebrity who only bangs other celebrities. Some seems fake about the whole deal.
Katy might as well be doing an ad for PMS meds.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by MissAnnThrope on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 1:17pm.
Whatayamean he's all over the map? He likes big boobs and fat butts, check his conquests. Of course he doesn't like 'em dark but that's okay, he likes the same type girl I do.
*cues up Sir Mix a Lot*
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
little_rascal, you and me both!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Cat >^,,^<
He should sue whoever cut his hair. How awful! Looks like the beginnings of a Mohawk! Regardless of what you think about him, the guy has gorgeous hair. What is that stupid bow tie all about? Katy must have dressed him. childish.
Submitted by Deb on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 2:15pm.
Submitted by little_rascal on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 1:52pm.
Oh I hope we're talking Michael Bolton's version! LOl!
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The one and only! That song gives me seizures! Hahahaha
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Submitted by Migraineuse on Fri, 09/14/2012 - 6:22pm.
All females belong to the sex class; they are subhuman buckets for male incontinence.
Submitted by little_rascal on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 1:52pm.
Oh I hope we're talking Michael Bolton's version! LOl!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
I love Mayer posts because y'all come up with the most hilarious jabs at him! LOL all the way down the thread.
Katy my lady, why oh why do you have to get with smarmy losers? And this one is the worst! A douchebag turdburglar who writes whiny easy listening music. Jeez, Katy, it's time for a dick diet until a GOOD surprise pops up. Rev up your vibrator; you'll be OK.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 1:47pm.
How the fuck does this guy ever get laid? Standards have hit a rock bottom low... (not that I'm complaining)
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Just watching this guy glom all over the microphone when he sings is just so repulsive to me. He must have some sort of magical golden dick. There can be no other explanation.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 12:46pm.
Deb -- muzak Barry White is a bit better, but still an offense to the memory of Mr. White. I'm thinking something super cheesey, like Neil Sedaka.
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♫ when a man loves a woman.... ♫
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Submitted by Migraineuse on Fri, 09/14/2012 - 6:22pm.
All females belong to the sex class; they are subhuman buckets for male incontinence.
How the fuck does this guy ever get laid? Standards have hit a rock bottom low... (not that I'm complaining)
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"Shitty relationships mystify me." ~ mike 09/22/2012
"I'm back. You're Welcome." ~ Kenny Powers
With her marriage and dating record so far we know she likes the UGGGly mens. She also seems to like them douchie so my guess for her next hook-up is either Lance Armstrong or Chris Brown.
Submitted by MissAnnThrope on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 1:17pm.
John Mayer strikes me as a guy who doesn't really know who he is. The people he dates -- he's all over the map. His personal style--- all over the map. He strikes me as having no stick-to-it-ness. Ok as a friend but not anything serious.
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Nah, he made it pretty clear that his dating-field doesn`t include areas with higher Melanin levels....He is a racist asshole.
Submitted by FreakyGeek:
"The reason they ended up together isn't rocket science. They're both known coke heads. Mayer wrecked his voice with coke...Russell broke up w/ Katy because he's sober & all she wanted to do is party."
While that may make sense, when you look at the facts it doesn't add up. No one in NA or AA would start or continue a relationshiop with someone with a drug and/or alcohol problem. I know for a fact Russell (as annoying as he sometimes is) is 100% clean and sober now for years. I don't think that's why they broke up. It was probably more due to her singing.
Ok so we all agree he's like painfully ugly right? This isn't just a case of being not photogenic.
He's a "taker" not a "giver" for sure.
John Mayer strikes me as a guy who doesn't really know who he is. The people he dates -- he's all over the map. His personal style--- all over the map. He strikes me as having no stick-to-it-ness. Ok as a friend but not anything serious.
I can't believe some people are still fooled by Katy Perry.. She is no innocent bee here. She loves drugged up bad boys.
Everyone thought whitney was a church going goody goody but we all know she was into drugs and other bad behavior...
The only positive thing I have to say is Katy found an AMAZING makeup artist to make her look good in the face.. Sans makeup is a hot mess.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 12:46pm.
Twatty, how about "The Pina Colada Song"?
edit:
Keep it in the toilet, indeed! lol!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Deb -- muzak Barry White is a bit better, but still an offense to the memory of Mr. White. I'm thinking something super cheesey, like Neil Sedaka.
I AM Afraid -- wow, John Mayer is into water & skat sports? I did not know that. I don't know how any person could let someone pee or crap on them -- I just don't get it. Keep it in the toilet, people!!!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
The reason they ended up together isn't rocket science. They're both known coke heads. Mayer wrecked his voice with coke...Russell broke up w/ Katy because he's sober & all she wanted to do is party. There were half a dozen blind items about Katy's habit around the time they divorced.
The last I heard, Russell is supposedly with Geri Halliwell now.
They're both plain as day talentless douchebags so they fit each other perfectly.
B!i!i!iD~
For your health.
I thought these twits were broken up? I dont really give a fuck.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
They look pretty miserable (especially Katy) in these pics.
He must have just given her the old "It's not you, it's me" speech.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
He must have a talking, rainbow -flavored cock, 'cause I just don't get it...
John Mayer is into poop play?
Wow.
He is disgusting.
She is disgusting.
Why y'all hatin? They're perfect.
I would rather do Russell Brand. So this is actually a downgrade. Strange twist of events that she goes after someone who makes Brand look like the winner.
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Worrying is using your imagination
to create something you don’t want.
Whoever hops on John Mayer`s dick at this point, knowing his track-record, deserves every puss-filled sore and genital-wart she gets...
I wouldnt fuck that dude with somebody else`s Vagina.
GAH.
How the fuck can any woman with the skinniest shed of pride be caught out and about with this loser? Doesn't she care that the whole world knows he's into the nasty water sports in the bedroom and that when they get home from their special dinner he's going to shit that special dinner out of his ass all over her!!!!! Gee, Katy . . . you couldn't make it with a sober Russell Brand but you flaunt THIS nastiness and don't care that people get a whiff of Meyer's fecal fluids when you pass by? Niiiiiiice . . .
He looks like he has bad breath
This: "half-assed Canadian groomsman" made me HOWL.
Made my morning. Which I needed.
John Mayer is an anomaly. I don't get it.
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Worrying is using your imagination
to create something you don’t want.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 10/17/2012 - 11:42am.
OK, Twatty. How about musak Barry White?
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson