White Oprah Never Disappoints

September 13, 2012 / Posted by:

The last time the drunk leach on Lindsay Lohan’s wallet and Cookie Puss’ arch rival White Oprah tore her mouth away from an economy-sized bottle of Popov vodka to proudly represent the definition of delusion in an interview, it was a stuttering disaster of a magical mess. White Oprah’s legendary trainwreck interview with Matt Lauer became AA’s 13th step: DO NOT LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU.

Well, for her encore, White Oprah sat down with the real Oprah’s humanized hemorrhoid, Dr. Phil, to talk about how she’s an enabling piece of raggedy trash and has the parenting skills of a cracked meth pipe. The full interview airs on Monday, but because nothing will get eyes on your show like the promise of a showdown between a testicle with a stache and a drunken, giggling pile of weave hair, a 60-second teaser has been released. It’s 60 seconds of YES and I love it when an exploiter exploits an exploiter.

Somewhere, the doctor who delivered LiLo is tearing up his medical license as punishment for not giving her to a pack of hobos in the hospital alleyway so she could stand some kind of chance at living a normal life.

And “You’re in your little tie and your little shoes….” is now my favorite line to spit at a ho who is judging me for being a boozed-up disaster.

via Lainey Gossip 

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