Every White Cockatoo Is Not Amused By This
As UsWeekly pointed out last night, Miley Cyrus showed up to the VMAs last night with Pink's signature butch bitch mohawk on her head. Pink clearly has this, because she's had a white cockatoo on the top of her dome for what feels like years and she really went hardcore by wearing a hair clip that looks parking lot spikes. Don't back up! Miley clearly doesn't have this, because (maybe it's the lighting) but that Jedward mop is almost the exact shade of an old urinal cake and it makes her look a Top Chef reject (because you know, they only accept a certain number of blond mohawks every season).
Yes, Miley looks like if Mad Max took place on top of Honey Boo Boo's dumpster boutique, but she can easily save this look. All she has to do is get a nose-to-ear chain and add a long fall of microbraids to the back of her heard. The world of glamour just hasn't been the same since Jane Child disappeared and Miley's hillbilly chipmunk ass can feel that void.
And since I have other highly important CNN-worthy news stories to get to today, I'm just going throw up a bunch of pictures from last night. Here those bitches are:
Taylor Swift looking like an American Girl doll as a pharmaceutical sales rep (Pro tip of the day: Do not watch Taylor's high school musical theater performance. Watch Bye, Bye Birdie instead).
Emma Watson serving up some Scooby Snack realness. It's like something you'd see on Project Runway if the designers had to make a dress out of old Scooby Doo Gang costumes.
Jessica Szohr looking like a miniaturized and deflated Big Ang.
Amber Roast and Wiz Khalifa told anybody with a mic that she's knocked up. They said it on the red carpet and then he said it on stage. It was annoying when Beyonce did it last year and it was extra annoying when these two bitches did it last night. I guarantee you that if Amber and Wiz announced she's pregnant in an empty Piggy Wiggly parking lot, they'd get the same reaction they got while announcing it to millions of people last night.
And here's the rest: Zoe Saldana, Alicia Keys, Green Day, One Direction and Katy Perry.
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Submitted by IrishFury on Fri, 09/07/2012 - 2:26pm.
And greenday - I do think you are talented but your time has come to stop dressing like you're still 22. You're not. The spikey hair and "guy-liner" is joke worthy.
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That was my first thought. Mike Dirnt needs to stop with the peek-a-boo belly, Billie Joe's eyeliner is lost in his crow's feet and that hairstyle has always looked idiotic on him, and Tre Cool (ugh) looks like he should sidestep a few feel over to that ridiculous One Direction wreck.
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The girl wearing the headband is Jessica Szor. She's gorgeous, but she's not consistently photogenic.
Katy looks beautiful. Love that she went back to black hair.
Taylor trying to look more like a Kennedy. Where are the girly dresses she normally wears?
Emma's dress is SO cute.
Zoe is one of those girls whose face does not look good when she's too skinny.
who is the fug skinny skank in the leopard headband. jeez...she looks like the type who would suck it behind the bleachers.
And miley, oh please...you are NOT edgey. your face is too fat for the angular cut. Pink and the guy look like tatooed beef jerky. Katey looks surprising cleaned up.
And when are bitches gonna stop doing that crossed leg I gotta piss pose?
Miley's face!!! Not good in that cut... Not good.
Taylor looks like she breafs through her mouf all creepy status.. I wanna punch her teeth in.
I had no idea Miley's ears stuck out that much. Yeesh.
I like Pink, she seems cool, but omg why not get those moles cut off your face?
Carmen Carrera did it better :D
Pink has a dick, right? Ir at least s/he was born with a weenus?
Yaddah yaddah yaddah... Robyn and Emeli Sandé still did it best.
Carey is the hotness. Oh I so fucking would.
YUM Carey is looking HOT. He makes me feel warm inside.
Dannii, maybe it's because Pink's older, who knows. But for this crowd, Pink and Green Day seem the edgiest to me, lol I get the impression Miley will move on to something else soon as she gets bored with it.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I like this on Pink, but not on Miley. The cut is cute, but looks better when she wears it slicked down and to one side.
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
I guess i am the only one who thinks this hairstyle is good on miley (i think it suits her more than her other hairstyles)
but still totally agree with fredfred
"pink, miley, and green day are about as edgy as bowling balls."
i really dont get this adoration for pink like shes alternative-shes as alternative as avril lavigne. (yeah i said it-but someone had to at some point!)
Katy Perry is one gorgeous bytach...
Pink has edge. "Miley's hillbilly chipmunk ass" has NONE! What a twat, lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Chipmunk Punk.
i despise miley. fug faced skank
Cyrus looks like a low rent Brigitte Nielsen and I have to say, that takes some doing!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
The sad thing is that Miley had started to look decent just before she cut/died her hair.
Nope.
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Pink looks good. Miley looks like an idiot.
Submitted by Dog on Fri, 09/07/2012 - 5:16pm.
Um...there's a straight one? *scratches head*
So which is the straight one in that boy band?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Maggie69 & jackie -- thank you, both of you! Miley is an ugly little hillbilly. Like I said earlier, you either have to be beautiful or edgy with lots of attitude to pull off this look; she's neither.
This hairdo is a cry for help. Looks like Miley wants out of her engagement and is hoping to make Liam think the break up is his idea.
I like Alecia Keys. Saw her in concert and she was great. 2 hours of music, no gimmicks.
Half the audience were Mom/Daughters and Mom/Daughters/Grandma. I'm thinking she doesn't appeal to men much. I just like her music.
Lady Gaga might have died her hair LV brown but Miley went with LiLo's meth grill yellow!!
Stay classy my friends!!
pink, miley, and green day are about as edgy as bowling balls.
and can someone send miley some proactive?
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watching hardcore ufos
Miley does not have the face ... and I mean DOES. NOT. HAVE. THE. FACE to pull that look off.
Miley just doesn't have the face to pull off that hairstyle. She is the definition of butterface.
I saw the pre-show. Wiz and Amber seemed genuinely happy. When asked how she was feeling (standing there in that long-sleeved black gown in the sun) she said, "I'm hot, my feet hurt, and I'm gonna go sit down" or something close to that. At least she's keeping it real.
Pink and Carey seem happy too. Thumb #2 - the smile around his eyes when he's kissing her says a ton to me. And as someone said down thread...she's bi or pan. She's never denied it, she dated a chick when she and Carey broke up the first time, I think.
Taylor Swift. 400 lbs of make-up. My first thought when I saw a close-up (on tv) of her face was that she looked like a mannequin, and not in a good way.
Green Day. Dress a decade older please. BJA - it's time to let go of the eyeliner. I thought they cancelled a show a few days ago because he had lost his voice, taken to the hospital even? I missed if they said something anout this, but he didn't seem to be straining or lip-syncing?
The show itself was horrid. That stage manager needs to be fired, and never hired again. Terrible lighting, terrible sound, terrible camera angles. Just awful.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Fri, 09/07/2012 - 3:36pm.
luvsmekitty -- LOL! You're like me. I TRY to think, okay, is there something nice I can say? And then I'm like, fuck it!
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They make it too hard! The hair, the makeup, the smugness, the redick outfits, they're rich, I'm poor, FUCK!
I like Pink. I always have liked her. She rocks to her own beat.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Fri, 09/07/2012 - 3:39pm.
Please sell tickets. i would like the concessions contract, please. we can agree to disagree re: excluding Amber Rose
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Hey, no prob, in the line she goes! The more the merrier. After all, we're just slapping faces. I really don't know who the hell she is anyway.
Submitted by Jeanneee on Fri, 09/07/2012 - 2:09pm.
The VMA's are always such a smorgasbord of ridiculousness. Nowadays it just makes me feel old and out-of-touch to watch anything on MTV, especially the VMA's, because I have no idea who anyone is.
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Me too. I kept asking "who is that?" over and over. I even said when I was growing up we had real rappers. I am official getting old. *sigh*
Something about that Jessica sore chick pisses me off. She's always making that stupid face and I really can't stand her.
Submitted by luvsmekitty on Fri, 09/07/2012 - 3:01pm.
"All of these folks need to stand in a line so I can run back and forth, slapping each one across the face. Green Day and that nauseating boy band twerps need to head up the line. Hermione and Pink/husband are excluded. The pregnant person too, I guess."
Please sell tickets. i would like the concessions contract, please. we can agree to disagree re: excluding Amber Rose
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
luvsmekitty -- LOL! You're like me. I TRY to think, okay, is there something nice I can say? And then I'm like, fuck it!
Paper Bag, meet Miley.
Miley, meet Paper Bag.
I'm sure you'll get on famously.
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What the fuck dude? And being European is NOT an excuse. - IHateCharityChic 05/10/2012
Another reason why I hate MTV...fuckers dont even play good music anymores.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
So long as she isn't a Lohan about it, I don't mind "Edgey Miley." But yeah, her head wasn't made for a fauxhawk.
I just figured out who Miley reminds me of:
http://images.search.yahoo.com/images/view;_ylt=A2KJkPoQQEpQFDUAB6OJzbkF...
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Fri, 09/07/2012 - 2:11pm.
NOT IMPRESSED -- and the bf wants to see that movie with Jeremy Irons, Bradley Cooper & Zoe Saldana in it, "The Words." Now I love Jeremy Irons, but Bradley Cooper looks like an emu and Saldana looks like an ugly, emaciated bitch. Will watch when it comes on cable.
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Sounds like a plan! Even Jeremy Irons couldn't convince to pay to see anything starring those two ugly, overrated bags of blah. I'll just wait til it streams on Netflix...in like 2014. LOL!
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Douchechill!
snowy, yeeesh! Alicia Key's has such ugly thick stump legs!!!
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Nothing, nothing is manageable
So can't we skip the valedictories
I can see the door there
Shut it and forget my number
why is Miley even there? When was the last time she recorded any "music"?
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Nothing, nothing is manageable
So can't we skip the valedictories
I can see the door there
Shut it and forget my number
Snowy: Right? Haha as soon as they came on stage the camera would switch to TL getting his reaction. Had a twinkle in his eye and smile every time.
How stupid did Lil Wayne look with them damn headphones on? I'm starting to think his spechul.
I am so full of negative, rude comments after looking at these pics so I will try to focus on the posi...aw fuck it!
All of these folks need to stand in a line so I can run back and forth, slapping each one across the face. Green Day and that nauseating boy band twerps need to head up the line. Hermione and Pink/husband are excluded. The pregnant person too, I guess.