Shia LaDouche On Why He And Carey Mulligan Broke Up
Since Shia LaDouche is really method, he's forever farting out douche dingles from his mouth to prepare himself for the day he plays the title role in The Summer's Eve That Never Ends: The Shia LaDouche Story. That explains what came out of Shia's mouth when he talked to The Sunday Times (via The Daily Mail) about why he stopped humping on Carey Mulligan. Carey didn't dump Shia because she was sick of spraying RAID on her chocha every time they bumped parts. Carey also didn't dump Shia because she woke up one day, smelled the dirty douche water and realized that's not what she wanted to do with her life anymore. Shia says that they broke up, because Carey wanted a wedding ring on her finger and babies in her belly.
"Carey is not just an actress, she is a great human being, a sweet girl and super intelligent. Our thing came down to not having compatible work/lifestyles. We were always travelling, and had sensibility differences that weren't conducive to living with one another. I'm harder on myself and my surroundings than she is, and we had a culture shock in terms of meeting her parents and vice versa. Sensibilities, cultures, histories. There were differences, that's all.
She's happy as hell right now, and we wouldn't have been able to make it like that. She was chasing marriage, family, kids more than I was. I'm not opposed to marriage. I just think I'm quite young. I come from divorce. I'm only doing marriage once. It's not a game for me. I'm not a religious person, but I have ethics."
Okay, okay, I take back what I said about that quote being just another dehydrated menstrual berry spat out by Shia. Shia actually did a good thing for Carey. It's always nice when you don't have to stretch your muscles by dodging a greasy bullet because the greasy bullet did you a major favor by dodging you instead. A real act of kindness.
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wow he is so deep and meaningful
The only time this douche is interesting is when he won't leave a Walgreen's. He needs to shut-up. Carey got lucky missing this mess.
I have no interest in what this douche hippie has to say about ANYTHING.
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Visit The Freckle on Lindsay Lohan's Lip on Facebook.
Your father was a hamster and your mother smells
Of elderberries***************
Certified Slore
UGH, just can't with Shia, sorry Evil_Shoe ;) but I have zero interest in his love life. It's in the past, different priorities... I think Carey is a good actress.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by snowball on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 7:12pm.
Whatever minor bit of hot he had left him right along with her. She also took his comb, deodorant, laundry detergent and desire to keep his genitals clean judging by recent pictures.
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Lol, truer words...whenever I see a recent pic of his greasy pony-tailed head I get a flash of a magnifying glass on the crabs crawling on his crotch hair. /shiver
Whatever minor bit of hot he had left him right along with her. She also took his comb, deodorant, laundry detergent and desire to keep his genitals clean judging by recent pictures.
Translation:
She met my folks and coded then I met her uppity folks. My mom is far too glamorous for her.
Submitted by can be a pushy broad on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 1:54pm.
Tomohawk,(OT: Good for him and her, but it would've been fine if he hadn't told us)
That's why I think he's a prick.
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Of course he is, I think someone should send him Jack's comment as it is a pretty good characteristic of who Shia is.
Though I have to defend Megan (yeah, I have a soft spot for her), she maybe thought that appearance isn't everything and tried him out, cause you know, not so beautiful people are SOOO much nicer ;)
I hope she learned her lesson.
Carey Mulligan was so brilliant in An Education that you could show me video of her skinning puppies and I'd probably excuse it.
He is SUCH an asshole pisher, second only to John Mayer. I think Mulligan dodged a huge bullet there.
After reading this I predict that if there's an Oscar in his future then there's a wife he'll neglect to give thanks to for putting up with his pretentious ass.
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You can't be pregnant. That rape was legitimate.
"meeting the parents" should have been a red flag.
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"‘OK, I’m really famous,"- KStew
ty- *iconzicons*
ubmitted by jerseygirl17 on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 1:03pm.
Kind of passive-aggressive. Say some nice things about her, then imply she just wanted a ring and her marriage won't last (that's how I read the last paragraph "I'm only getting married once. I have ethics" blah blah)
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That's exactly how I read it jerseygirl.
And the super snarky 'I'm harder on myself and my surroundings than she is' & 'She was chasing marriage, family, kids more than I was.' Suggesting he's a serious thespian and she's just a comfort loving part time actress and soon to be baby factory.
This shister is a top-shelf, grade A, all-round, WANKER!
Ferme la bouche!!!!!!
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Certified Slore
I guess he isn't keeping it a private matter because everybody assumes she left him over alleged drug and alcohol addiction.
She sure jumped into marriage very quickly with that Mumford & Sons dude.
Yes, but did he use the word epitome?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5j3jypUCo8
That's the old, "it's not you, it's me", breakup speach with too many words...
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...the end
Submitted by MissAnnThrope on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 1:57pm.
( her family was probably middle America while his was super weird dysfunctional).
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She's British.....
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"Shut up, brain! "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun." "Did he participate in the actual Olympics or Special Olympics?" Evil_Cupcake
Ok, who the fuck is PIP , and why I did get accused of being them?
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 12:43pm.
snowy, I do not think gl is PIP. But I am pretty sure "Esteem" is.
yeah, I said it
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I am the poster that had the name spider3tattoo and changed my name due to a stalker. I told a couple of people this when I changed my name.
I don't know how being the FIRST person to befend Hekki against gladyslove and then report her got me labeled as some troll or whatever. Seriously.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 1:39pm.
... shit, tell her you've got a variety pack of unfrozen ice pops back at the grounds keeper's shed.
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Groundskeeper Willie!!?
"Now, the kilt was only for day-to-day wear. In battle, we donned a full-length ball gown covered in sequins. The idea was to blind your opponent with luxury."
He alludes to/ admits he is a child of divorce and it was painful. He admits he was too young and he was honest about differences in how they grew up ( her family was probably middle America while his was super weird dysfunctional). He was also very complimentary toward her. This makes me like him a smudge more. Maybe he's young and one day will grow into a good man.
EC: you've got to see Drive. Got to. Never Let Me Go was a downer but worth it.
Tomohawk,(OT: Good for him and her, but it would've been fine if he hadn't told us)
That's why I think he's a prick.
Submitted by CokeyBloke on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 1:42pm.
Yes, I liked Never Let Me Go, and I liked her in An Education as well. Have not seen Drive.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 1:39pm.
... shit, tell her you've got a variety pack of unfrozen ice pops back at the grounds keeper's shed you live in on the public golf course and POW!! you just got laid.....
*blink* *blink*
Steve, is that you??
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
i hate myself for saying this outloud, but douche looks sorta hot...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
She's lovely and understated. Was excellent in "Drive" and "Never Let Me Go."
This fucking midget thinks he's God's gift to everything because he fucked that annoying ass mouth breather Megan Fox... like it would be difficult to get her in to your bed... shit, tell her you've got a variety pack of unfrozen ice pops back at the grounds keeper's shed you live in on the public golf course and POW!! you just got laid and now you're watching some mentally deficient fuckhole gnaw at the one last nerve you have because she wants to "pillow talk" and nothing short of tossing a ball out in to the street will get rid of her... get over yourself, chief.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rly1ZZ076G8&feature=related ~ Kenny Powers
He made a lot of sense, but the appropriate response when asked about the breakup was, "that's really a private matter."
Can't snark on him. Don't know why, but there's just something about this kid I like.
"Okay, okay, I take back what I said about that quote being just another dehydrated menstrual berry spat out by Shia."
lol!!! This guy is a prick--im my humble opinion.
Napoleon complex. Yeah, he's got it.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
off-topic @ guest ... I laugh every time I see your avi. What was it MK called it *KK's 9th planet ass*
I love his outspokenness, but Carey dodged a bullet when they broke up.
Submitted by Themba on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 1:26pm.
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When I was 19-22 I had a boyfriend who abused me
When I was 23-25 I had a boyfriend who was practically impotent
I would have killed myself by now if I had married one of them.
I stuck way too long with them and I won't do that again. That's the benefit of being older and then commit.
Also after a long and complicated struggle I know who I am, most people in their 20s don't know or maybe most people never learn who they are, they just try to be someone they're not or they pretend they're someone they're not, just like Shia Laboeuf.
(OT: Good for him and her, but it would've been fine if he hadn't told us)
How could she even have been with him @ all ever?! *shudders*
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"I think my butt looks too big in these jeans."
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 1:15pm.
Why is anyone quoting him to begin with.
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Are you KIDDING LS!!?
Because he's the GREAT Shia Labeouf, this generation's Peter O'Toole, world leaders and scholars alike hang on his every word if only to glean perhaps just a little wisdom from his intellectual oratories
HOW DARE YOU!!
I still don't really know who these people are but he is annoying me with his words.
Why does getting married once always go hand in hand with waiting until you're older? Who's to say that waiting isn't going to be a worse marriage than had you stuck it out with someone you loved at a younger age? With that "too young" mentality, you may just miss out on the best thing that you'll ever get :) If you're madly in love, you'll want to get married...end of story. Unless you're opposed to marriage, which is entirely different.
Huge ego on that guy.
I like Carey...she rocks the pixie cut and she's a good actress (see her disturbing performance opposite Fassy in "Shame"). She's too good for LaDouchenozzle.
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SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
Like his Mrs. Mark Zuckerberg part II doesn't have the same sort of designs on him down the road? She's not with him because he's so darn hot, she's with him for his fame & money. Wake up, la Douche. Just when I thought I couldn't dislike him anymore . . .
Where's his movie with mads mikkelsen?! Damn that's all I care about this douchety douche
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 09/05/2012 - 12:56pm.
Why does he have a 7 on the side of his head?
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not a 7. it's an upside down "L". for loser.
I'd dump a stinky douche too.
Why is anyone quoting him to begin with.
Putting the cart before the horse there, eh Shia?
Something tells me he's going to get divorced no less than three times during his life.
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SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
"Carey is not just an actress, she is a great human being, a sweet girl and super intelligent. Our thing came down to not having compatible work/lifestyles."
That's where you end the discussion, if you're not an asshole.
Sarah Smile
I actually find him hot. Douchyness attracts me.
I truly believe that you haven't begun to scoop up all of life's beautiful moments until you've heard the line "Watch the wig!" from a piece while sitting on their face. - MK