As expected, American Idol has taken the dawg out back and he won’t be at the judge’s table to hold down Mimi when she tries to butterfly punch Nicki Minaj’s wig off. TMZ is hearing that Randy Jackson’s judge’s chair has been pulled out from under his ass and the producers are giving him the mentor role instead. The producers don’t really want to give Randy the mentor role, but they’re afraid that the world will stop spinning if he doesn’t have someone to say “yo dawg, yo dawn, yo dawg, I wasn’t feeling it, yo dawg, yo dawg” to all the time.
The producers are looking to get the ass cheeks of a country star, like Keith Urban, in the third judge’s chair and they also want to cast a fourth judge. Kanye West was talking to the producers at one point about having a seat at the judge’s table, but that’s not going to happen. So sadly, Ryan Gaycrest won’t get a natural tan when Mimi and Kanye’s egos rub together and sparks a wall of flames that shoots toward the stage.
TMZ’s source says that the producers aren’t sure who should get the fourth seat, but I have two suggestions. Since they’re just throwing piles of money at Mimi and Nicki, they should save a few coins by casting a plastic Randy Jackson bobble head doll that says “YO DAWG!” on a loop or they should try to get the empty RNC chair. If that empty chair can handle getting yelled at by Dirty Harry, it can totally handle those tone-deaf singing kids.