It’s an old lez as Old Liz! Thanks to a luscious nest of black polyester hair and a whole lot of prosthetics to make the weathered and meth-damaged leather mask she calls a face look younger, Lindsay Lohan actually looks glamorous as a 1980s era Elizabeth Taylor. Lifetime released a few more stills from Liz & Dick (or as future historians will call it, the biggest disaster of 2012) and the make-up team should go ahead and collect their Emmy now for making a haggard mess look like a glamorous blossom from the 1980s. Yes, LiLo looks like Larry Fortensky in La Liz drag, but she’s still never looked hotter. Bitch actually looks younger.
In other LiLo news, the owner of the trailer Elizabeth Taylor used while filming Cleopatra tells CNN that she is not happy with the producers of Liz & Dick, because when she lent it to them, it was in pristine condition and it came back to her looking like a freckled tornado of crack smoke hit it hard. Angel Alger spent $58,000, her entire life savings, to buy the trailer in June. Two days after she bought it, she let the producers of Liz & Dick borrow it for a week. The producers wanted to use it, because it’s where Elizabeth and Richard Burton humped on each other between shooting scenes for Cleopatra.
When Angel got the trailer back, it looked like the inside of LiLo’s nostrils: cracked, burned and jacked up. There were cigarette burns everywhere, dishes were cracked and even a rocking chair was missing. Angel estimates that the damage totals around $100,000. An insurance type from the studio met with Angel and toured the trailer earlier this month, but so far they haven’t compensated her at all.
You’ll never guess whose name burped out of Angel’s mouth when CNN asked her who she thinks trashed her trailer:
“Only a psychotic and rebellious person or people would steal irreplaceable museum belongings and leave it in this vandalized condition.”
In other words: You know who. Blow out a coke booger if you need a clue. Angel thinks it’s LiLo, because DUH, and also because an employee from the studio told her that LiLo and her friends had access to it after shooting each night. But LiLo’s rep, who earns credits toward getting his PhD in lie-telling with each statement he releases, denies it was her.
Hopefully, Angel gets some money out of this (she won’t), but in the meantime, if she needs to calm her tattered nerves, she should just walk into the trailer, hold down one of her nostrils and snort real deep, because I’m sure there’s a huge cloud of coke dust in there.
And here’s more stills from Liz & Dick including one with Richard Burton (played by Grant Bowler) and one of LiLo as Kleptopatra.