Hot Slut Of The Day!
Ms. Besse Cooper was already a HSOTD two Marches ago when Guinness crowned her as The Queen of The Mega Memaws by certifying her as the world's oldest living person, but she's made it through another year, so she's getting her second HSOTD title. On Sunday, Ms. Besse celebrated her sweet 116th birthday at her nursing home in Monroe, Georgia and became a member of an elite group of eight super centenarians who have lived to see 116. Screw the Avengers! I want to see an IMAX 3D movie starring the 8 Super Olds.
Ms. Besse was born in 1896, married her husband Luther in 1924, buried him in 1964 and her four children gave her 12 grandchildren and her 12 grandchildren gave her a ton of great-grandchildren and her tons of great-grandchildren gave her a bunch of great-great grandchildren. Ms. Besse is also the head of the vampire authority in Monroe.
On her 116th birthday, Ms. Besse not only got a very special sheet cake from Walmart, but Guinness says Walton County honored her old ass by naming a bridge after her. Walton County also honored all memaws everywhere by making young brats ask "Great grandma, may I?" before crossing the bridge. If they don't, they get two belt whips to the knuckles.
When reporters at her birthday party asked her what the secret to outliving us all is, she said the same thing she said at her Guinness crowning in 2011: "I mind my own business and I don't eat junk food." What I think she really means by that is, "Stop asking me that stupid fucking question and let me eat this cake!"
If I ever make it to 116 and reporters ask me what my secret is, I hope I say, "Eating pork rinds, filling my insides with booze and weed smoke, pooping wherever I want and not giving a fuck."
via People (For Roy and Peggy)
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Born in 1896? That means she saw a whole century! I wonder about stuff like that. Going from buggies, to cars, to the Internet. I still marvel at cable television!
She's 116 and all she got by way of a cake was that shitty number with the store bought candles! FUCK! They must want rid of her like herpes, after all she's already spent all of their inherantence so what use is she?
HEY!!! My GREAT GREAT GRANNY Lived to 116 as well...FIRST!!! and she outlived 3 husbands! so suck it Cooper!!!
....Never mind....You Rock Ms Besse Cooper.....you deserve all the love....you're amazing!!!
.....but my Gran was FIRST!!!
*slam*
Yeah, I don't know about pork rinds MK but everything else, yes! She must be doing something right to live that long, lol Kudos to great great great memaw Besse! ;)
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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My grandmother smoked like a chimney and drank like a fish- lived to 98 years old.
I think longevity has less to do with how you live and more with genetics/attitude.
"The 8 Super Olds" HAHA!
If I'm in good health, I want every day the Lord blesses me with. But if *I* get to be her age, I will be that old crazy ass man cussing out people for no reason other than the fact that I *can*.
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Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 12:10pm.
LMAO!!!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:56am.
Thanks! I am so excited!! I will give you a full report after the show, I promise. It's not until 11/30, so I have time to get in shape and get a haircut, so when he tells me from the stage how much he loves me and begs me to come on tour with him, I'll look nice. ;-)
Submitted by Kizzy: "...Plus, I'm sure I'll have Sicilian Alzheimer's, I'll only remember the grudges."
HAHAHAHAHAHA!
My mother has that, but she's not Sicilian.
When reporters at her birthday party asked her what the secret to outliving us all is, she said... "I mind my own business and I don't eat junk food."
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LOL yes, no Dlister is going to live to be an old oldie.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:13am.
"I'm up in everyone's bidness and eat like shit, so I guess I'll make to around 46."
if Besse right about the rules, i think i'm already dead and just don't know it yet.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
This story has got to give the bikini duchesses husband pause for thought.
Same as my nan. She is "only" 80 but dayum she remembers what she ate on the 8th of august 1948! No messing about with her. Ger sight is crap but if I spill so much as a crumb on her immaculate carpet she gets her hoover out.
wait a minute. Ms. Besse wasn't married until she was 28 in 1924. My nana was 28 when she got married in 1947 and she told me how it was embarrassing that she wasn't married. Everyone called her an old maid or spinster (old-timey term for les) and always asked her why she wasn't married yet. But the 20s were the first feminist movement, so i guess its understandable for Ms. Besse. If you are busy dancing, drinking, and fucking why would you want to get married. I'm not sure there was even an expectation of work for young women back then.
"I want to see an IMAX 3D movie starring the 8 Super Olds."
They could put Sylvester Stallone in it and call it the Dependsables.
I love birthdays. If I make it to 116 I might actually die. People live long as fuck in my fam. My Memaw is 96. My great-great-memaw was 99 (1985) when she died. Just a side note.... her and my great grandfather were married for 75 years (1981), then he died. Yes they were 12 & 14 but hey it was like that back then. Back to birthdays....My great-aunt is going to be 99 next month. My uncle and I figured out that my great grandparents have 400+ descendants present day (they had 10 out of 15 make it to adulthood). I hope Ms. Besse's kids kids kids kids kids were there to help her celebrate. Cause thats what my old ass would want.
One time this old woman told me it was her 85th birthday. I said how awesome or some shit and scowled at me and said something akin to being pissed that she hadn't died yet.
"Eating pork rinds, filling my insides with booze and weed smoke, pooping wherever I want and not giving a fuck."
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In my case one would have to change the pork rinds into chocolate, booze into coffee and cola, weed into plain smoke and otherwise that would be my quote - though hands down; I won't grow that old.
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Submitted by Nanners on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:15am.
My memaw is 87 and is sharp as a tack. She'll tell you how some bitch did her wrong in 1957.
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That's actually the sign for alzheimers, even if your gran (?) doesn't have to have it. The brain starts to delete itself, beginning at the most recent point and then erasing until "only" childhood memories are left. My gran used to tell me about how my grandfather died (15 years ago), then how my father grew up, then what she saw during WW2. That doesn't mean that she doesn't remember anything that happened recently, she may or she may not, or she may one day and forget it the next or the other way around. The brain is funny. My other grandmother acted the same way, and I only knew her with alzheimers.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:13am.
I didn't get to tell you yesterday how jealous AND excited I am for you getting to see Ray LaMontagne! Can't wait to hear how the performance was! Lucky! I would love to see him live!
On another note, I do not believe for one minute MK eats pork rinds!
Congratulations Miss Besse! I also think one of the reasons she lived so long was her kids didn't kill her, which means she isn't rich and is probably stress-free.
La Duquesa de Alba is looking hotter and hotter.
Submitted by guest on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:29am.
Wonder if she had to have help blowing out her candles?
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No, the fire dept. was already there.
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Submitted by louise_brooks on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:13am.
I'm up in everyone's bidness and eat like shit, so I guess I'll make to around 46.
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Me, too. I'm 40, and I think I have another 10-15 years left, but that's about it. Plus, I'm sure I'll have Sicilian Alzheimer's, I'll only remember the grudges.
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Wonder if she had to have help blowing out her candles?
boredasfuckyo yeah, when I was your age I felt that about being in my 40's and yet here I am! ;p
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"Shut up, brain! "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun." "Did he participate in the actual Olympics or Special Olympics?" Evil_Cupcake
LOL boredasfuck
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SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
Damn, that's old. Congrats, memaw!
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SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
I never understood how growing old as balls was ever considered a blessing. The only perk I hear anyone ever have about getting old is not giving a fuck. I'm 27, and I don't give a fuck NOW! I don't need to be 86, decrepit, a million and one aches, wearing a diaper, having skin like a Chinese sharp pei, and not remembering the names of my own family members to do that. Why would anyone wanna live to be this old? I mean I don't wanna die, but I sure as fuck don't wanna get to an age where I'm wheelchair bound and look like a California raisin.
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"What if all you understand could fit into the center of a hand? And then you found it wasn't you, who held the sum of everything you knew?"
PLEASE POST HER BIKINI PICS, MK
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"Shut up, brain! "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun." "Did he participate in the actual Olympics or Special Olympics?" Evil_Cupcake
Unless you have all your mental faculties and are fairly mobile it must be a bitch to live past 90.
My memaw is 87 and is sharp as a tack. She'll tell you how some bitch did her wrong in 1957.
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What the fuck dude? And being European is NOT an excuse. - IHateCharityChic 05/10/2012
I'm up in everyone's bidness and eat like shit, so I guess I'll make to around 46.
If I live that long, I want to be fucked up as a 9-eyed bat every day.
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Well good for her but no thanks.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Honestly, she doesn't even look older than 90.
Sarah Smile
"pooping wherever I want and not giving a fuck."
AMEN!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Welllp, looks like none of US will live as long as this memaw.