Would You Hit It?

August 25, 2012 / Posted by:

Here’s Victoria’s Secret angel collector Leonardo DiCatchAHo looking like you want to buy a vowel from his ass, because he looks like Pat Sajak if Pat Sajak’s toupee was made out of bloated guinea pigs. Leonardo drowned the top of his head in a bowl of Nice ‘N Easy and rubbed his face on a plate of Fashion Fair foundation to play a stockbroker in the 80s in Martin Scorsese’s The Wolf of Wall Street. No, The Wolf of Wall Street isn’t a sequel to Teen Wolf and isn’t about Scott Howard all grown up and working as a stockbroker. I wish.

Leo looks like either a roasted marshmallow in a Wink Martindale wig or like the real-life, freshly shaven version of that gorgeously restored Jesus Christ portrait.  So based on those descriptions alone, I’d hit it. Yes.

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