I See What You Did There, Madge

Goat-footed, wheezy, old queen Elton John kept his elder bitch fight with Madge going earlier this month when he called her a fairground stripper who needs to put it away for good. Madge didn’t really respond at the time, and I just figured she was keeping her mouth shut, because she was busy learning the scent of Elton’s first born so that she can get revenge on him in 18 years by swallowing that boy whole with her crotch of doom. But Madge couldn’t wait that long and she responded to Elton at her show in Nice, France on Tuesday night by dedicating her song “Masterpiece” to him. While sort of dressed like a French fairground stripper in mourning, Madge served this speech to Elton on a bed of sticky sweet sarcasm:

“I’d like to dedicate this next song to a Mr. Elton John. I know he’s a big fan of it and I know he’s a big fan of mine. And you know what? I forgive him. You’ve gotta start somewhere.”

Fun fact: “Masterpiece” is the song that won the Golden Globe over Elton’s song and really put a fresh crack in his culo lips. So dedicating that song to Elton is like pouring salt on that culo crack and rubbing it in with vinegar.

This is like watching two asshole toddlers fight over a plastic bucket in the sandbox. It’s stupid and you’re not on either of their teams, but you can’t stop watching and secretly can’t wait until one of them finally hits the other in the head with the bucket.

And Elton hasn’t responded yet, but when he does, I’m sure it’ll look something like this:

via TMZ (click there if the video above isn’t working for your ass)