Lohan's Sea Jasper Dealer Might Not Have To Go On The Dole After All
It's sort of infuriating and depressing at the same time that an insane fuckup like Lindsay Lohan is going to make 2 million dollars this year. If any of us were out maniacally rear-ending every vehicle we could and trying to commute to work in an ambulance, we would probably be sans employment. Let alone freedom. But no, Lohan lives with her head firmly lodged in her own ass (sorry, it's DListed - "culo") and tells the law to eat her snatch on a continual basis and still gets paid.
This is the reason that kid abandoned society and traveled through the country and finally starved beside a bus in the wilderness. That was still a better alternative than trying to make it in a world where pinheads like Lohan are successful.
TMZ added up all the money she's going to make from various projects this year, and yep - she's a millionaire. Witness:
-- Playboy (December issue but she was paid in 2012) $1 Million
-- "Liz and Dick" Lifetime movie -- $300,000
-- "The Canyons" -- $6,480 (scale)
-- "Scary Movie" (Lindsay is about to sign on) -- $200,000
That isn't counting all of her alleged endorsement deals. Wear our jeans and you too can be a pathologically lie-telling cokehead who can't drive.
Take heart in the fact that she probably owes her dealer a huge sum for all the yay he gave her on IOU, and her insurance deductibles must be through the damn roof with the way she operates motor vehicles. Headless people drive better.
Dina Lohan should really open up some sort of school wherein she teaches asshole children that they can be assholes and still get paid. #getmoneydespitebeingadickheadbitch
Check out more pics of Lohan on the set of The Canyons in the gallery below.
Splash
• 
OMG! I love that hair color on her! Remember when she was a platinum blonde? She looks so much better like this! Yes she's lost some of her beauty, but the hair color is so much more natural.
am i the only one that thinks she looks pregnant? that is some serious bloat.
----------------------------------------
"It's called a party bus! Not a punch-a-titty bus. And put your MetroCard away, Chris Brown, no such bus exists." MK
I call bullshit on this story. They hire her because they are getting a cheap deal. I am willing to bet Playboy paid her about half or a quarter of a million.
Fattie
Playboy doesn't have a million to give-- I think that's why they chose Lohan in the first place.
Then there are her investments: I don't think the leggings worked out, neither did "Shoe Han" and she ended up getting sued over that Seven Nine spray-tan crap.
And she's had to pay her lawyer-- unless she just decided not to, which wouldn't surprise me. She settled on that reckless driving episode, which must've cost her something though it was cheaper than fighting it out in court.
Drugs, drink, rent, traveling, bodyguards-- that's an expensive lifestyle. Remember that story about a tanning salon suing her for forty grand?
She's fronting as an A-lister but making D-list money and I wonder how long that can last.
I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.
She has queef face.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 08/13/2012 - 10:52am.
Get Serious: "TMZ claims she's "rolling in the money" because she's supposed to have made (or will make) $2 million this year. However, what the TMZ 3rd grade dropouts forgot to mention is this is a GROSS figure, not net."
They're only just silently taking into consideration the cash she's making a
*****************************************
Yep! I'm sure she got a lot of "tips" this year!
I'm looking at the pics and from what I see she's barely hanging on to her youth. Seriously sometimes she looks OK but really other times she looks like a hag! One day the hag will take over completely.
Submitted by what do i know on Mon, 08/13/2012 - 1:58pm.
Why aren't my comments showing up?
-----------
I have no idea... weird, I can't see them either.
_____________________________________________
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rly1ZZ076G8&feature=related ~ Kenny Powers
quelle tache. What a stain.
never disappears, does she.
Lohan is looking healthier than before. But in net worth she's below EVEN Vanessa Hudgens and Minka Kelly and in earnings she's WAY behind KimK ($18M) and even KhloeK ($11M). For someone with her name recognition, Lohan is doing abysmally... One plus is that she is doing much better than Tonya Harding. She can be proud of that. smdh
•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠░░░░
Yeah, she looks great for a 40-year-old first-time mom just getting out of the hospital.
*************
"When in doubt, freak 'em out" -- Sharon Needles
Haters gunna hate, but I think this is the best/healthiest/freshest she's looked in YEARS. This is honestly the first time since like 2006 where she looks like what you'd expect the girl from Mean Girls to look like 8 years later
She looks horrible.
Her chins may be due to bulimia, her saggy boobs are due to not ever wearing a bra and probably insisting on too big implants.
Her bloated and sagging face is down to filler and botox. Why did they do that to her at such a young age?
lindsay looks good in that pic.having a bath does wonders.
She should always smile ALL THE TIME because, when she smiles, it lifts up that saggy double chin and jowls and is a big improvement.
Why aren't my comments showing up?
I just find her pasty and gross. She is going to look horrible in a few years--as she ages. Because she already looks torn up and she's still in her 20's.
Looks like she's walking out the back door of some place with that sweater on a hanger.
Is someone missing a sweater?
she may make all that money, but most of it, if not all is going to her legal fees.
***********************************************
And there you got me, that's how you got me, you taught me to be mean
What is with that one short piece of hair pointing down? I guess that's the real hair?
Twatty - no shit re the "scent"! I hate how she always has a lit cigarette wafting around in every damn pic...
_____________________________________________
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rly1ZZ076G8&feature=related ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 08/13/2012 - 12:20pm.
Snowy: that link convinces me they're real. I think they're okay, actually. Way nicer than bolt-ons.
-------------------
Agreed... I've always thought they were real...
_____________________________________________
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rly1ZZ076G8&feature=related ~ Kenny Powers
snowpiece -- I don't even know why the bitch was wearing a bikini, it's clear she wasn't going swimming, just an opportunity to show off her nasty, sagging udders. I wonder if her friends are immune to her nasty scent.
Snowy: that link convinces me they're real. I think they're okay, actually. Way nicer than bolt-ons.
Submitted by MissDior on Mon, 08/13/2012 - 12:07pm.
I hate to disagree, but Lohan does not have the talent of a Jennifer Lawrence. That girl was great in Winter's Bone, and Lohan, IMO has never been a good actress, nor could she pull off a dramatic role like that now or back then.
Oh yeah, I should have added that due to lack of talent, it was impossible as well! Thanks for the reminder! I'll edit it to add she could have been making Kate Hudson money. Lol!
Complete and total trash. They aren't going to get serious with her until she kills someone with her vehicle, and even then, they'll believe her when she uses the "I was drinking Kombucha and high on essential oils for my holistic healing plan!" excuse.
Fuck.
_______________________________________________
SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
Is she stealing that sweater? Looks like she's walking out the back door of some place with it.
If she had stayed on the "star" trajectory she was on in 2004 she *could* have been making 20 million dollars a movie! Seriously, she could be making K-Stew, Emma Stone or Jennifer Lawrence money, but really she's making scale! I mean 2 million is good in real life, but in Hollywood, it ain't shit. *Ok, she's also lacking in the talent of the above mentioned ladies, but she could have been making Kate Hudson money at least... On a good day...maybe.*
Seriously? Fake boobs can sag? Then what's the damned point?
************************************
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.Kravitz on August 19, 2008
"We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard
♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Bitch will be broke in 5 seconds. IF she pays any of her lawyer bills, the deductable on her car insurance (for recent accidents), she'll use what is left for more plastic surgery.
She's proven over and over she's a spendaholic. Plus her coke habit can't be cheap.
Fuck this bitch.
after she pays off coke dealer, agent & lawyers homegirl brings home 50 cents.
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
smug cunt:
here are more pics of her swaying udders
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2187563/Lindsay-Lohan-shows...
**************************
"Shut up, brain!" I replied. "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun."
it doesn't matter how much she makes. hohan appears to have endless credit everywhere. she's looking rather smug here. i'd like to slap her.
"Headless people drive better."
That had me laffin. Also, I enjoyed the social relevance angle of this story. MK usually just goes straight for the silly, but I think Blohan's kind of silly is utterly worn out.
*______________________________________*
I'm a heretic. Feel free to drive me from your midst.
Submitted by Get Serious on Mon, 08/13/2012 - 10:53am.
I'm calling complete & total bullshit on this story.
Dang, that was good.
That's two mill too many for her, she will fuck up and be broke again, she just can't help it
OK, say something nice: her hair is a much flattering color, her lips have calmed down a little and she looks far better without the pounds of makeup. And that weight looks good on her.
I am feeling so charitable today! :)
Also I keep thinking about that BI about the rich guy having this dirty slob on retainer for fuck movies and other filth. Or at least that's who we guessed.
The only reason I think it might not be her is that she is so damn defiant of any kind of contract or rules. Remember when she was supposed to appear in Europe somewhere (some rich Austrian dude'a party?) for $350k and she never showed up?
Oh, that face...
GetSerious: sounds like you've got a good handle on it. She has no assets, does she? Did she sell her beach condo, or whatever it was? Does she even own a home?
Hopefully Dina is putting a little by for a rainy day. I
After the obligatory, THIS BITCH AGAIN, I have to say that no matter how much money she makes her mug is still all sorts of fucked up.
Monay ain't gonna fix that.
It's never too late to be who you might have been.
~George Eliot~
Imma guess they're implants & due to her no bra ever rule they've dropped. She needs a lift.
Get Serious: "TMZ claims she's "rolling in the money" because she's supposed to have made (or will make) $2 million this year. However, what the TMZ 3rd grade dropouts forgot to mention is this is a GROSS figure, not net."
They're only just silently taking into consideration the cash she's making as a hooker.
boredasfuckyo -- "saggy-titted hambeast" -- LMAO!!!
If I were out dining and were seated near this twat, I'd demand to be seated somewhere else. I wouldn't need to smell the fumes eminating from her nasty crotch & pits, the ugly, smelly, disgusting whore. And just check out that shit-eating grin on her face -- oooh, she just pisses me off so bad!!!
I keep coming back to the Lifetime stuff and I apologize. Probably because I shamefully spend an inordinate amount of my wknd watching their movies (at least I laugh at them, though!) And I can't figure out for the life of me, how the hell did they get that kind of budget for this shit show?!?
Again, all of their movies look like they were shot over a 3 day wknd at some house in Toronto. I don't even think they can afford to rent the person's house. I think they show up at an open house and film until they get booted by the realtor.
I'm calling complete & total bullshit on this story.
TMZ claims she's "rolling in the money" because she's supposed to have made (or will make) $2 million this year. However, what the TMZ 3rd grade dropouts forgot to mention is this is a GROSS figure, not net, and is higly debatable to begin with. Playboy has confirmed that they paid her only $400,000 for her titty flash pics; NOT $1 million. Also, most lifetime movies have budgets that don't exceed $200,000, so I find her supposed $200,000 salary highly suspect. But, let's not quibble; let's assume the TMZ chimpanzees are correct at $2 million gross just for the sake of arguement. Pay 10% off the top to her enabling mom-ager, White Oprah. Then, pay an additional 5% to her other business managers. That leaves her with $1,700,000. Pay 50% to the state & federal governments for taxes; that leaves her with $850,000. She owes $200,000 for a tax lien; she owes her attornies over $200,000 for representing her drunk/drugged up ass in court. She still owes over $100,000 to a bail bond company for bonding her out & then defaulting on the bond. She owes over $600,000 in credit card debts. She's staying at the Chateu Marmont (minimum of $600+/night, depending on which room she's selected). She's leasing a Porsche Panamera (over $1,500/month in lease). And this doesn't even factor in how much booze she sucks up or nose candy she hoovers up on a daily basis, not to mention the other lawsuits she has to settle or daily expenditures for food/insundries.
Bottom line? She's broke; she's spent way more than she has. This story is complete & total bullshit.
--------------------------------------------
"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
Ho needs to stop renting porsches, clubbing, and pumping her face with shit in her lame attempt to erase the years she's added to her face due to her habits. I think that's one reason her face is bloated.